11-27-2010, 06:53 PM
Join Date: Jul 2010
| | Re: Emotional affair recovery
My husband did this to me yet, I felt he did not tell me the truth at the time as I had already had dealt with firtation issues with him that had gotten out of hand. The last one was the hardest blow as we had children involved and I felt/continued to feel like he had dishonored notonly me but our family as well. I found this site as I have let his emotional affair eat at me for years.
Every fight,I would bring up how he had hurt our family,every time things got rough, I worried if he was going to do it again. It seemed no matter what job he got, there was always a woman he found to talk to.it has driven me nuts. He always says,it was in the past. We need to forget to move on. Would it be better if he just lied and said he slept with her even though he says he didn't?
What I have come to realize there are lots of reasons in our marraige that contributed to him looking for attention from another woman. However it did not make it right.
All I can tell you, is you have to make a true choice of whether you are able to forgive and mean it. You have to be willing to let go. There are going to be really bad days and you need to express to your husband how he can help you feel better. Maybe it means more hugs,listening to you or making you feel like you are the one he wants to be with. Spend more time together so you become more confident in your relationship with your hubby. Don't let yourself become a victim.as soon as you give in to that mentality, it goes downhill from there.
If you believe your hubby and trust him then find out what caused him to go into an EA and fix it.,work on it and continue to work on it. Let yourself grieve but do not keep holding resentment or it will eat at your love andtrust for your hubby.
I feel for you,but don't let it waste precious years that you can be happy. It is hard work but once you set your mind to dealing with the issue and not blaming yourself,hubby,OW.you. can and will survive it!
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