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On Beating Up The OM (or even the OW)

31K views 262 replies 53 participants last post by  movin on 
#1 ·
My ex had 3 bertayals that I was aware of.

The first was with a wealthy man who she chased to have a lavish lifestyle. He, literally, threw out his wife and 2 kids to move mine in. I was totally unaware. Because she was more chasing him (as I was told) I had no real thoughts of taking after him.

The second was a rebound betrayal after she was thrown out of the wealthy man's house and came crawling back begging forgiveness. That guy was simply pouncing on a weak woman. When I caught him at my house I lit into him. Not like it appears on TV (a lot of missed or blocked punches and pushing really), but I knocked him down good with a punch (I used to box) and wrestled/threw him out of the house.

The third was with some POS and she was taking off her wedding ring and told him she wasn't married. I can forgive that as he had no idea of her marriage.

But beat downs, to me, can be a right response. Not in every case, but in some.
 
#200 ·
Of course there's the flip side where the WS doesn't give a flying f**k that you are harassing the piece of excrement OM. My ex Ws didn't care. In fact she accused me of stalking him and his wife!

When it came to the attempted restraining order court date my ex WS refused to stand side by side with me and said he & I were like two children. She wanted nothing to do with the very thing she helped create.

The restraining order application failed. I had some satisfaction that the coward didn't show but like others here I feel there is unfinished business - I can wait.
 
#201 ·
She wanted nothing to do with the very thing she helped create. .
All of this anger and wanting to get even with the OM or OW, while justified, is pretty misdirected. The OM / OW should always be the secondary target. The WH / WW should be harshly delt with first ... they are the main criminals, the OM / OW are just accomplices to the crime. Why the fear of going after WH / WW? (Reconciliation is really not an excuse)
 
#223 ·
"If I was the OM and got beaten up for taking advantage of what was offered I would most certainly be contacting the police with a view to ruining the attackers life.

Failing that I would be plotting my own revenge................ "

Well, then we think very differently.

I would think that I just f*cked with a man's life who had never done anything to me, and if I was honest about it, I deserved what was done.

Plus, I would feel like a total douche running, crying to the police saying, "I f*cked this guy's wife and he beat me up."

Of course, I think that way cause I'm not a POS...I'm sure most scumbags who would be a POSOM would indeed be angry that they got some payback for screwing with another man.

I have no problems with a man getting his 'pound of flesh' from someone who has done him one of the worst wrongs another man can inflict.

IMO, at a certain level, there is an issue between two men that has nothing to do with the WW.

I would NEVER allow another man to wrong me unjustly and unprovoked without retaliating.

This f*cker would have just destroyed my entire life, and if I had kids, he would have destroyed their family and happy childhood.

I don't care that he had my WW as a partner in doing this, POS does NOT get a free pass in my book.

I would absolutely destroy his reputation and life in any way possible, and if I could figure out a way to avoid jail, he would be getting a physical beat down as well.

A man who injures another man should EXPECT to be retaliated on.

All giving a free pass to a sh*tbag like this does is give him no pause or consideration before he goes on to do it to another guy.

One poster here on TAM, I believe it is Flood, admits he was often an OM when he was wild and younger...but he got a REAL eyeopener (if I recall right) when he found himself with a gun in his mouth begging the man whose life he had just destroyed to let him disappear.

Now guns and killing are wrong and over the top for payback...but I don't think a black eye or busted lip are.
 
#224 ·
Well, then we think very differently.

I would think that I just f*cked with a man's life who had never done anything to me, and if I was honest about it, I deserved what was done.

Plus, I would feel like a total douche running, crying to the police saying, "I f*cked this guy's wife and he beat me up."

Of course, I think that way cause I'm not a POS...I'm sure most scumbags who would be a POSOM would indeed be angry that they got some payback for screwing with another man.

I have no problems with a man getting his 'pound of flesh' from someone who has done him one of the worst wrongs another man can inflict.

IMO, at a certain level, there is an issue between two men that has nothing to do with the WW.

I would NEVER allow another man to wrong me unjustly and unprovoked without retaliating.

This f*cker would have just destroyed my entire life, and if I had kids, he would have destroyed their family and happy childhood.

I don't care that he had my WW as a partner in doing this, POS does NOT get a free pass in my book.

I would absolutely destroy his reputation and life in any way possible, and if I could figure out a way to avoid jail, he would be getting a physical beat down as well.
How to Say Yes in Different Languages

Pick the first ten -- one for each of the notions presented in the above.

A man who injures another man should EXPECT to be retaliated on.
Yes! This is one of the points that I've been trying to make all along. You can't stick your hand into a beehive and not expect to bee stung (Ha ha!). Well, actually, you could, but you'd be a f*cking idiot.

All giving a free pass to a sh*tbag like this does is give him no pause or consideration before he goes on to do it to another guy.
Amen! Testify, brother!

One poster here on TAM, I believe it is Flood, admits he was often an OM when he was wild and younger...but he got a REAL eyeopener (if I recall right) when he found himself with a gun in his mouth begging the man whose life he had just destroyed to let him disappear.
Ah, Mr. Flood. What a character. I thoroughly enjoy reading his posts as, if nothing else, they are certain entertaining. But even still, I can't help but think that his wife's infidelity was (though 110% on her) the Universe's way of delivering a very highly-customized Karma Bus to his front door.

Haven't seen him post regularly in a while, hope he's doing well.

Now guns and killing are wrong and over the top for payback...but I don't think a black eye or busted lip are.
Agreed, though mostly due to the precedent and principle put forth here.
 
#235 ·
"When we decided to live in communities, we decided to give up on individual justice and settle for rules of law."

This is absolutely true...under the social contract theory of government (on which our society and civilization are based), we have given up our NATURAL RIGHT for retaliation against those who wrong us BECAUSE the government will get justice for us on those individuals.

So what to do when the government REFUSES to get justice for the wrongs inflicted on you? (and this actually applies to far more than just infidelity, as even a cursory review of the actions of Wall Street bankers will demonstrate)

Well at that point, IMO, the contract is voided...the government failed to deliver on its DUTIES under it, and my natural right is returned...it did not disappear.

I view any retaliation on the POS to be obtaining justice that the government has failed to provide...not only failed but (in our current system) REFUSED to provide.

So, under these circumstances,I see nothing MORALLY wrong with retaliation/revenge.

I'm enough of a realist to admit, however, that the government will undoubtedly refuse to admit their failures under the social contract and will aim to punish anyone who attempts to gain justice themselves for the injuries inflicted...in other words, you might/probably will face legal ramifications if you go after someone.

Now, many people might disagree with what I have written, and that's fine, but I think anyone disagreeing would have to concede that 238 years ago they would have said that any man who signed the Declaration of Independence was a criminal and a traitor deserving of the harshest punishment by the British.

Because the argument I just made is essentially the same one put into the Declaration by Jefferson and his collaborators.
 
#238 ·
Wow!!!

Gents, we now have an absolute mandate -- backed by Jeffersonian principles -- to seek out tangible satisfaction in the face of the horrendous and egregious injustices perpetrated against us by the "Other Men" constituency!

Well played, Dyokemm. :smthumbup:
 
#236 ·
Wysh, looking back at some of your replies in this thread, I get the sense that what you're trying to do here is to advise everyone involved of the potential pitfalls that may arise from seeking some sort of physical revenge against an OM. Honestly, that's fair enough.

After all, the "mess w/ the bull, get the horns", "play w/ fire, get burned", "can't take the heat, stay out of the kitchen" principle applies both ways.

Point taken. Having said that, I stand by mine as well.
 
#239 ·
Wysh, looking back at some of your replies here, I get the sense that what you're trying to do here is to advise everyone involved of the potential pitfalls that may arise from seeking some sort of physical revenge against an OM. Honestly, that's fair enough.

After all, "mess w/ the bull, get the horns", "play w/ fire, get burned", "can't take the heat, stay out of the kitchen" principle applies both ways.

Point taken. Having said that, I stand by mine as well.
Just exactly that Gus!

And as I've said I'm a hypocrite although I never hit the guy, just threatened him. However if I knew (I wish I knew) that he definitely had I'm not sure I wouldn't have hit him. I'm glad I didn't.
 
#250 ·
Are you still with this woman?!?!??


On beating up OM/OW. When I fooled around with married woman back in the day, I didn't really get beat up. But I did get "handled" one time by a Husband that was kinda, what's the word. Gangsteresque I guess you could say.

After that experience I stopped bangin' married woman. And haven't and will not since.

But I think, you reap what you sow. So if you bang married chicks then you know, you gotta pay the piper.

And in some instances that means an a$$ whoopin' or worse.
 
#251 ·
But I think, you reap what you sow. So if you bang married chicks then you know, you gotta pay the piper.

And in some instances that means an a$$ whoopin' or worse.
If only all the APs out there shared this philosophy, there would not necessarily be less infidelity, but there would be less judicial involvement.

All of my WW's OMs are pu$$ies and have proven it by spouting out sh!t but then hiding behind the law when called out on their actions and comments (lets see the same set of state laws that says adultery is illegal is not a good enough law for you to obey or care about, but assault and battery are perfectly legitimate laws to support and uphold??). It is amazing how they can selectively justify their thoughts and situations based upon their ideals of the laws that are legitimate and come into play and how they would affect them directly.
 
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#252 ·
Squeakr,

Well put.

These POSs are the ultimate in contemptible cowards.

There is NOTHING more chickensh*t in this world then committing an unprovoked injury on another person, then running to get the law to protect you from the justly deserved retaliation.

And the fact POSs are so contemptible also makes the WSs equally contemptible in my book,

Anyone who would be interested in 'THAT' gets zero respect in my book.
 
#253 ·
My x-wife feared I'd, at the very least, confront the OM.

I remember telling her something along the lines of "He is a POS, but you are the one that willingly spread your legs for him. You are who I really need to deal with"

Besides that, I knew if they got together that getting her is punishment enough for him. And it was. He is in hell, and so is she:D
 
#254 · (Edited)
Life has a way of punishing wrongs (not always though). Think about the WS and the OM/OW who get such an ego boost but then realize they've won the prize shiny turd.

Sometimes affair partners hook up for long term relationships but the odds are like 2% of long term success. Even then so many of that 98% who flop will not openly admit it was because of a tainted foundation. They just keep on blame shifting. But I have to believe they know down deep.
 
#255 ·
My ex had 3 bertayals that I was aware of.

The first was with a wealthy man who she chased to have a lavish lifestyle. He, literally, threw out his wife and 2 kids to move mine in. I was totally unaware. Because she was more chasing him (as I was told) I had no real thoughts of taking after him.
This doesn't make any sense to me.

You were married. Your wife moved in with another man. You were unaware of what? That he had been married? Why did being unaware of whatever it was make a difference?



The second was a rebound betrayal after she was thrown out of the wealthy man's house and came crawling back begging forgiveness. That guy was simply pouncing on a weak woman. When I caught him at my house I lit into him. Not like it appears on TV (a lot of missed or blocked punches and pushing really), but I knocked him down good with a punch (I used to box) and wrestled/threw him out of the house.
in every case, but in some.

I don't have a problem with defending the home. I'm just not sure of the logic being used here, nor do I think we actually have a story. Like what actually happened. Sequence of events. That matters a great deal. "pouncing on a weak woman" is figurative, not literal, and makes it sound like you interrupted him beating her.

My husband killed a burglar before I met him. I could tell the story in a number of different ways and depending on what I leave out it would very much change how people felt about my husband. Before I do, I want to hear yours.
 
#257 ·
My POS called and texted me for over a year,he would threaten to come over to my house
and rape my wife.He set up fights with me then would run,I'd see him in traffic and he would run again.
He kept telling me he was going to kick my azz,started talking sh!t about my kids.
His long term GF told me he was thinging about going to the cops because he was afraind
of me.
I was the one that went to the cops,they called him and told him to knock t off,
he did for awhile then started up again.
It was only when I got ahold of his work and threatend to sue them and him that his calls and
text to me stopped.
God have mercy on him when I finally to run into him and he can't get away because I won't.
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#259 ·
Old bf from hs,it was a EA on facebook,they did'nt get physical then ether.
Nothing but a coward.
Wife even outed herself after she came to her senses.
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