How do you track text messages?
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Coping with Infidelity Relationship recovery from the destructiveness of infidelity.

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Old 03-21-2011, 04:41 PM   #1 (permalink)
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Default How do you track text messages?

My wife is having the very beginnings of interaction with an ex boyfriend...probably her greatest love before me (and without question her greatest source of hurt). I'm in the military and overseas and I've seen on her facebook account some activity where she's liked a couple posts of his and he's liked a couple posts of hers. Unless she's using a different email address (I doubt...she's not tech savvy at all) I know she hasn't sent him or received any email messages. But I wonder if she texts him. Probably not but I want to know and nip it in the bud if it happens or is happening.
How can I see her texts? She has an LG enV3 so it's not like you can download apps to it...and I couldn't anyway because I'm half way around the world. When I get on to our wireless carrier's website (Verizon) there's nothing there...just the phone numbers she's texting (and I have no idea what his phone # would be but none of the numbers she's texted raise any red flags but again, I don't know what I don't know right now).
Is it possible for me to do this without her knowing?
It's probably nothing, but I want to know right away if anything begins to flourish with her ex.

Last edited by IH8theFriendZone; 03-21-2011 at 05:09 PM.
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Old 03-21-2011, 05:08 PM   #2 (permalink)
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Default Re: How do you track text messages?

I once asked our carrier if it were possible to obtain texts from their system, and was told that it's not...for privacy purposes, they don't keep copies of those transmissions. What you should be able to do, at the very least, is see the date, time and phone number of all texts, incoming and outgoing, on your bill. Our carrier allows us to log in and view bill details for both phone and data (text) transmissions.
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Old 03-21-2011, 05:14 PM   #3 (permalink)
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Default Re: How do you track text messages?

Yeah, I can do that. I can see a list of every number she's texted and every number who has texted her. Trouble is, I have no idea what this guy's cell phone number is, so if I could skim the messages I'd be able to pick out if she's getting in touch with him. I'm sure it's probably nothing, but as Pres Reagan said, "Trust, but verify." If something starts to go down, I want to know about it immediately.

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I once asked our carrier if it were possible to obtain texts from their system, and was told that it's not...for privacy purposes, they don't keep copies of those transmissions. What you should be able to do, at the very least, is see the date, time and phone number of all texts, incoming and outgoing, on your bill. Our carrier allows us to log in and view bill details for both phone and data (text) transmissions.
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Old 03-21-2011, 05:31 PM   #4 (permalink)
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Default Re: How do you track text messages?

You can't get the text message itself, but you can get a list of numbers that have been text.
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Old 03-21-2011, 06:05 PM   #5 (permalink)
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Default Re: How do you track text messages?

you can do a cell lookup and pay for the name of the owner of a cell number, I hate to admit that, as I have encouraged my husband to take a look at this site, and I am damn sure he would look at all of my posts and threads, generally it's about 10 bucks.
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Old 03-21-2011, 06:57 PM   #6 (permalink)
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Default Re: How do you track text messages?

Verizon has the ability to retrieve all text messages that have been sent and received. You need someone to subpoena them. They are used alot in divorce cases or when being harrassed.
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Old 03-21-2011, 07:20 PM   #7 (permalink)
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Default Re: How do you track text messages?

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Originally Posted by kgregory1011 View Post
Verizon has the ability to retrieve all text messages that have been sent and received. You need someone to subpoena them. They are used alot in divorce cases or when being harrassed.
Yes this is correct. All cell phone carriers in the US, after Sep 11 are mandated to keep a copy of the content of the text messages. But if the messages are sent via Blackberry email then you cannot get the content and you need a subpoena to do that.
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Old 03-22-2011, 07:45 AM   #8 (permalink)
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Default Re: How do you track text messages?

Do you know the numbers of people that she would regularly text? If so, you may be able to see if she is texting somebody you don't know. Also, look at past month's statements and see if she is texting a new number all of a sudden.
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Old 03-17-2012, 07:54 PM   #9 (permalink)
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Default Re: How do you track text messages?

Hey Buddy,
All you have to do is talk to your wife...
Let her know what you know and how you feel about it. Sneaking around to find out secrets is an option. But an open communication with your loved one is always the best way. If she is truely giving this other guy serious consideration, then there is the possibility that you guys are not meant to last. You married here because you love her, she married you because she loves you. You have to trust in that until otherwise proven wrong. If you talk to her about your issues,
and she doesn't support concerns, then you may have a problem. I hope you get your piece of mind, you have my utmost respect. If you don't get the response from her that you want, then you will know.... There are sooo many women out there, so don't let it get you down, if you don't like what she has to say. The fact is though.... "Open and Honest"... is truely the only way to find your happiness.... Don't hide from who your are, and don't hide from what you fear.... No matter what the outcome... look life in the eye and keep moving forward...
Good luck to ya.... And thanks for doing what you do....
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Old 03-17-2012, 08:05 PM   #10 (permalink)
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Default Re: How do you track text messages?

Talking to my wife would have been great if she would have told the truth.

Protect your marriage and do the work in trusting but verifing that trust.
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Old 03-18-2012, 10:37 AM   #11 (permalink)
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Default Re: How do you track text messages?

Quote:
Originally Posted by IH8theFriendZone View Post
My wife is having the very beginnings of interaction with an ex boyfriend...probably her greatest love before me (and without question her greatest source of hurt). I'm in the military and overseas and I've seen on her facebook account some activity where she's liked a couple posts of his and he's liked a couple posts of hers. Unless she's using a different email address (I doubt...she's not tech savvy at all) I know she hasn't sent him or received any email messages. But I wonder if she texts him. Probably not but I want to know and nip it in the bud if it happens or is happening.
How can I see her texts? She has an LG enV3 so it's not like you can download apps to it...and I couldn't anyway because I'm half way around the world. When I get on to our wireless carrier's website (Verizon) there's nothing there...just the phone numbers she's texting (and I have no idea what his phone # would be but none of the numbers she's texted raise any red flags but again, I don't know what I don't know right now).
Is it possible for me to do this without her knowing?
It's probably nothing, but I want to know right away if anything begins to flourish with her ex.
You do need to let her know that facebooking exs is way out of line NO ONE should do that. It seems like half the affairs here nave a facebook componet to them. Don't be hostile but ask her to defriend him. Ask her how it would look if you started chatting up your ex girfriends.

Be firm but nice. Let her know you have boundaries and thats a deal breaker. If she says you are controlling, tell her she can do anything she wants but when it crosses your boundaries you have to do what you have to do also.

Trust but verify always.
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Old 11-09-2012, 01:36 AM   #12 (permalink)
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Default Re: How do you track text messages?

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Originally Posted by ladyybyrd View Post
You can't get the text message itself, but you can get a list of numbers that have been text.
Yes, you can get the phone numbers from your phone provider. If yoou want to know the content of the message, you may need a sms tracker.

Last edited by henson; 11-11-2012 at 07:08 PM.
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Old 11-09-2012, 03:33 AM   #13 (permalink)
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Default Re: How do you track text messages?

If you see a sudden increase in the number if Txts to a certain number then you'll know.
My H was txtin his xOw over 60 times a day. It went from zero to 60 in a week! Then you'll know!
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Old 11-10-2012, 09:15 AM   #14 (permalink)
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Originally Posted by daisygirl 41 View Post
If you see a sudden increase in the number if Txts to a certain number then you'll know.
My H was txtin his xOw over 60 times a day. It went from zero to 60 in a week! Then you'll know!
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I agree. My wife went from 200 texts a month to 1600 a month when she started her affair and every one of them was to that one special number. If something is going on the dates/times/quantity of the texts should be a pretty good indicator even if you dont have the content.
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Old 11-10-2012, 09:32 AM   #15 (permalink)
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Default Re: How do you track text messages?

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