04-21-2011, 08:49 PM
Join Date: Mar 2011
| | Re: A (formerly) beautiful thing....
We attended MC on Monday, and a 45 minute session became two long hours. In a period of 2 hours, the MC looked at my wife and said "I'm confused. You just said X, but now your saying Y. It sounds like you may be very passive-aggressive at a minimum." the MC was blown away at the behavior of my wife. I just kept my mouth shut for most of the time.
that being said, I have now made my choice. As I was sitting there in MC session, it suddenly became very clear to me. There is absolutely no helping this person or this marriage. She is stuck on some odd "let's just forget the past and focus only on how we move forward" rationale. She doesn't realize that she is only HALF CORRECT. For me, there is no moving forward without knowing the FULL truth of how much I was betrayed. She would rather keep that part of the story a hiccup in our ten years together.
I am getting a divorce. I am moving to my new career, new state, all of it, ALONE. I have not yet decided if I will fight for full custody. Time will tell.
I am now taking complete control of my own life back. And it feels pretty good.
I have told her this. She wants to "separate" first, and see if we can work it out like that. I told her- "you don't understand: Separation does NOT mean you get to frolic with OM while I work. So I won't put myself through that-because I know that is what you will end up doing anyway."
Anyway, I'll keep writing on here to vent, and ask for advice. I still feel terribly sad for having to leave my daughter's daily life soon, but I will be a better Father in the end for it anyway.