tarheel68

I have a question for others ,,, myself im in second marriage and have been comepletly faithful in this marriage . In my first marriage i had an affair and quite honestly couldnt live with the guilt even though our marriage had alot of issues . Question: How long did it take you to break it off with the other man/woman and how many chances did your spouse give you after you promised to stop having contact with the other person,,


Reason i ask, My wife has had an affair and even after she told me she would have no other contact with this guy ,i caught her lying . This affair was only found out less than 2 weeks ago and i know it is hard to break ties with someone you have grown to have feelings for and i am trying to be understanding but i want that chapter closed .

Im not at fault in this situation, i have neglected my wifes pleas for more time and understanding of her needs ..We have communicated alot in the past 2 weeks and we both have said we want to work it out . I want to be the husband she wants and we are going to start with a councellor tommorow

So if i could get some input from everyone ,,would be greatly appreciated

mommy22

I held off on responding to this one in hopes you'd get some more responses. It's different from my situation in that I broke off the relationship prior to my confession.

It's been a short while since you posted this. How are things?

IMO, she needs to sever all ties immediately. It's a choice she has to make and she can't string you along. She must be willing to give it her all and you must be willing to fill in those missing pieces where she felt neglected.

Hopefully, your counselor has given you both some objective insight as well.

draconis

I never cheated ever, but have help people through it on both sides.

For your marriage to work she needs to cut all ties now. She might mourn for a bit just like losing any relationship, but her contact with TOM is poisoning your marriage

draconis

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