He has shown you who he is over and over again. Believe him. What is up with the lawyer stuff? Where is he moving to?
Keep brushing Dobie's teeth
Nothing on the lawyer stuff so far. First one I spoke with wanted $1,150 upfront and I don't have that kind of extra around. I contacted 2 lawyers yesterday that according to the websites work sliding scale fees but I have yet to hear back from either of them.
He is moving to the city where his job is, which is an hour away. I will be happy to have him an hour away. He should hopefully be moving next week!
I'm looking Jellybeans, I am looking. Lawyers just really want a thing known as money and I have none as I am trying to pay off 2 months worth of bills that my H neglected to pay.
He's been at the house all day today. We talked about getting the house bills transferred into my name, we talked about when he would be officially moving out. Then, I do not know what came over me but I stood there and told him all about how much I hate him. I told him how he disgusts me and I just let me emotions flow. He stood there and he did acknowledge the fact that he is an @sshole but still as I looked into his eyes, I could there was no remorse. I stood there and sobbed like a baby, letting him know how much I hated him for what he did and then, without knowing why, it's like my legs controlled me, I walked over to him and I wrapped my arms around him. He hugged me back and he held me while I sobbed some more. I then dried my eyes, I looked him in the eyes and I told him he was free, that I had released him. I told him if he wanted to pursure her, to pursue her. I was not going to wait for him, I had not only freed him, but I freed myself and I had officially released myself of any cords that tied myself to this marriage. I gave him a kiss on his lips, I said "good bye" and I walked away. Well, about an hour passes and he asks me if I would go with him to take the kids and the dog with the really clean teeth (hehe) to the park with him. I said no. He said "I want you to go" So, I went. We spent maybe an hour at the park and came home. I went back to my room to use my computer and he came back to the room too and was telling me about some stuff with his job. He then put our daughter to bed and he left the house. He's been gone about an hour now. I feel kind of indifferent about him being gone right now. I would bet my grandma he's off with "her" right now. The thought of him being with her before always killed me, tonight I kinda feel like whatever. I did not like being around him so much today. I found myself starting to "feel" for him. This is why NC is a must. I told him once he moved out, I did not want to see him. I said being that we do have children together, I know there will be times when I do have to see you but those times can be few and far between. I told him that when he comes to pick up the kids, I will send them outside, there would be no need for him to come inside and likewise when he brings them home. No need to come in. The other day, I placed our wedding rings in a box, sealed it shut with tape and wrote on the box "R.I.P. Marriage May 21, 1997 - April 3, 2011 May you rest in peace" When we are officially divorced, I'm going to bury the box, I'm going to grieve, and say good bye. A funeral for my marriage. I think it will be a hard day but I also think it will be good therapy for me in a way.
I am sorry Apple, I looked at my rings yesterday and cried. I wanted to write a note to him saying, Here is the ring you gave me, give it back to me when you are ready to be my husband again, put my ring in it and leave it in his truck when he was at work, I thought better of it, and just let it lie. He is on the couch as I write this, and I am not saying a word to him unless he speaks to me first.
Good for you, Apple. You did the right thing. But I wouldn't have gone to the park with him. I know, it's hard. But you are detaching. You can do this!
I put my wedding rings into my jewelry box. I also took out all kinds of old rings and stuff I'm going to go sell for scrap gold money. I have this feeling that H came and took his original wedding band last week when he got the rest of his stuff so he could sell it to have spending money for the week with his OW. I'm selling my promise ring and ILU ring and MOM ring. But I'll hold onto my wedding band and engagement ring for now. SO sad.
don't sell your mothers ring!!! lol, unless MOM stands for something else.
No, it's just a channel set diamond band that says mom on the inside. But he gave it to me. And I don't wear it. And almost every piece of jewelry from him makes me sad.
ahhh, I see. I only have 3 pieces of jewelry he has given me, my wedding ring, a necklace for our 10 yr anniversary, and a locket he gave me shortly after we got together, everytime I look at them I choke up.
My H's cousin stole my wedding band when we were married 4 years. He was an alcholic, stole it when I had removed it, placed it in my jewelry box and went to do house chores (dishes and such).
the next thing i knew it was gone. Wish i had it now so I could have at least sold it.
Apple, I read your park story. It was like a soap opera. You expressed hatred, hugged him, kissed him then went to the park with him. What did he do to deserve you, a caring, selfless, beautiful MILF of a woman, going to the park with him? Hm?
Slept with an OW. Awesome. I'm going to find a woman I like, sleep with her again and again because I know that when I get home, my wife will still be there for me. That is exactly what your husband is thinking.
Apple, I'm begging you. Do a COMPLETE 180 or divorce him like yesterday...
Apple, I read your park story. It was like a soap opera. You expressed hatred, hugged him, kissed him then went to the park with him. What did he do to deserve you, a caring, selfless, beautiful MILF of a woman, going to the park with him? Hm?
Slept with an OW. Awesome. I'm going to find a woman I like, sleep with her again and again because I know that when I get home, my wife will still be there for me. That is exactly what your husband is thinking.
Apple, I'm begging you. Do a COMPLETE 180 or divorce him like yesterday...
If he is thinking this way, then why is he talking about how he wants a divorce?
And he doesnt deserve me. I was good to him. I was not perfect, I had my moments but I never cheated, I never made him feel unworthy of me. This is his loss, right?
it's hard to 180 a person you live with, but her H is moving out!!!! I did pretty good on mine last night and this morning, although right now it is coming across as angry silence, I guess to some degree it is a little, but it'll get better by tonight. Last night my H slept on the couch, cuz he probably figured I was pissed. I made him get up and come to bed cuz he took the alarm clock downstairs and I needed to be up at 6, and was afraid that he would hit snooze and I would get up late. I didn't say a whole lot this morning either, told me he got on fb last night and didn't do anything he shouldn't do. I said, none of my business not my problem, carry on with or talk to whoever you want, none of my business. I know now I shouldn't have thrown in the carrying on comment, slipped out before i could stop it. He didn't say goodbye when he left, I wonder if I struck a nerve, selfish me kind of hopes it did. Well, regardless Apple, the first few days of a 180 there is bound to be some slip ups right?
Re: "Just a friend" needs to go away already 
