SWEETP76

I recently caught my 39 yo husband of 14 years sexting AGAIN!!! Over the course of the last few years this is the 2nd time I can actually prove he did it. The first time I forgave him, because I felt i was to blame, maybe I wasn't giving him what he needed. He was texting a girl he had sex with years before we were married. Damn that myspace. This time it was with a 22 year old, that he met through pur childrens football team. Since the first incident I have had serious trust issue, so yes... I spy! In April I noticed he posted a craiglist ad looking for some one to sext with. I gave him the ultimatum at that time... If it happens again, I'm gone! Well it happened again, he has been sexting with this girl for over 2 months even on the day I was delivering our 3rd child. His excuse is he doesn't know why he does it, it means nothing. Well to me it means everything, this is cheating in my opinion, these 2 idiots are both married! He tells me he loves me and that I am his world, but I can't fully believe that. He is a liar and a cheater in my opinion. I feel disrespected, and I can no longer trust him. Not to mention I have to look this chick in the face and know that my husband has had intimate exchanges with her. I want to leave him.... Any advise??????

2nd_t!me iz_best

i would tell her husband then seriously think about leaving.
are you sure it was only sexting with his ex or this time?
it is cheating.
if he likes sexting so much, why couldnt he have done it with you?

sigma1299

I think you're completely right to feel the way you do, including wanting to leave him. There are several here with experience and who know what they're talking about that I know will chime in quickly. Fool me once shame on you - fool me twice shame on me and there won't be a third time. It'd be almost impossible for me to reconcile with someone who cheated on me twice and it is undeniably cheating.

Good Luck.

Runs like Dog

Jesus Christ don't people have anything better to do with their time?

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lovestruckout

My current situation started with texting, which led to sexting, which led to lewd pictures which my wife was sending to a man she works with.

Totally unacceptable, and I think this electronic world we live in has made it much easier to have affairs. The people involved in the affairs think it's innocent since there is no psychical contact, but to that I say horse sh!t.

Watch as the rate of people being exposed in affairs continues to skyrocket due to the ease of being able to engage.

SWEETP76

No I'm not sure he hasn't done more, the ex is in Colorado, this new girl he does see regular at football practice and such, which I couldn't attend do to bed rest and since her husband is on deployment it would be an easy connection.

lovestruckout

So true. Get a god damn hobby.

SWEETP76

I love how they maintain that it doesn't mean anything... If the shoe was on the other foot, I'm sure it would mean plenty!

Jellybeans

Why do you have to look the chick in the face? Do you see her regularly or something?

yes, he is a cheater. So follow through on your ultimatum that you gave him in April.

SWEETP76

Her family is affiliated with the football team my kids play on. So now she's there regularly. I can't stop supporting my kids sporting events and I'm not the type to hide from people either.

PHTlump

You told him it would be over. I think you either separate or admit you were bluffing and it will take more than 2/3 sexting partners to make you leave.

It's possible that separation will bring him back to reality. You can always reconcile at a later date. I would contact a lawyer and file for separation.

As for football, pull your kids out. They won't like it, but it's your husband's fault. Tell them that the separation will make it too hard to get them to practice/games on time.

Jellybeans

IF she is married tell her husband about the sexting. Do so without letting her or your husband know beforehand.

Gabriel

PHTLump's post is awesome. Yeah, let the parents figure out how to tell the kids why they aren't in football anymore.

"Well, daddy was saying naughty sexy things to Kid's mom, so now you can't play football anymore."

Ha!

Almostrecovered

there's a big difference between one who makes a mistake and engages in appropriate behavior and then realizes they were wrong and makes steps to correct it and one who is a serial cheater who makes excuses and never does what they need to do

your husband falls into the second category, it wouldn't surprise me if he has done much much more than what you have found

he had his second chance and refused to do what he needed to, show him you weren't making empty threats

SWEETP76

UPDATE: After breaking him down emotionally, I demand to know what all the text/sext about and he told me that a lot of their exchanges were about their families and how much the loved us... I don't understand how you can say such things and then have the audacity to have sexual conversations. Apparently they discussed her likes and dislikes sexually yet he says they agreed that they would never act on them. He says its started with a text about a dream she had about him "cumming" over to fix her garbage disposal. Sounds like a bad soap opera to me! He says he was never aroused by her and that these exchanges were nothing compared to what him and his ex had sexted about a couple of years ago which he confesses were pretty bad. Even though he cried a lot and maintains he was very wrong he still says "it wasn't that bad". I disagree!
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