I'm not willing to tolerate anything else. But I also don't want to throw my marriage away. Up to 2 months ago, it really was the perfect marriage. I guess if he isn't willing to do that, then I will just start packing. Posted via Mobile Device
Well of course your don't want to throw away your marriage. No one does. Thing is, if he is not willing to give her up, then you need to decide whether you want to live in an open marriage or not.
Yeah, definitely no more of those. And no, I will not have an open marriage. I will not be second best. And yes, I am going to tell him who he can and cannot be friends w/. Another of his complaints last night. Posted via Mobile Device
No. He met her for that purpose, but it hadn't happened yet. We were still in the "getting to know you" stages. Then there was the kiss a couple weeks into it. But that's it. Posted via Mobile Device
We decided to find another "friend". Hubby met a woman, and right off the bat I had issues. She stayed @ our house almost constantly for a while, which quickly got old. She even worked @ my husband's business to help pay for the cost of her staying w/ us. After a few weeks of her being around, I began to have weird feelings, and was sure something was going on. Between work and then @ home, they were together more than he and I. I took my kids to a local amusement park for an overnight, and sure of my feelings, I planted 2 voice recorders. I was sorry I did. Though they didn't have sex, she did kiss him, and they had very intimate conversations. From my interpretation, she seemed to be developing feelings for him. H and I talked about all of this, and he very sincerely doesn't believe she is. I asked her what this or that comment meant, and she said she was referring to parts of her life, etc. I didn't and don't believe her. I have since got over that indiscretion, and have called off any future "activity
So...where did he meet her???? How did she end up at your house? Why was she at your house all the time??? Where does she live that she needs to be in your home at all times of the day? Did you guys have a 3some with her or not?
He met her through mutual friends on facebook originally. She ended up coming over one day to meet me, and didn't leave for about a few days til I threw a fit. I guess her family is a bunch of druggies she don't want to be around, and we are "normal" ppl. She had recently moved back from florida and is saying with her bro and sis in law. Hubby initially felt sorry for her, and we agreed that if this is someone we were going to allow into our lives, we'd rather know wut was going on with her. Drastic, I know. And no, we did not have a threesome yet. Came kinda close, but not officially. Posted via Mobile Device
i just read through your whole thread... wow! you guys really threw a monkey wrench in your marriage by inviting an unstable third person into a two person marriage. your first encounter went well because you had known this person for a long while, but to pick someone at random like that did you guys in. clearly, this girl had problems before meeting-up with you guys- didn't you guys even check her out before asking her to come over? i mean... who gets invited and decides to just crash at your house for sex, and then stay for an extended period of time without being formally invited? that should've been a red flag right there. i'm not judging you, but why would a third person bring more intimacy to a marriage made for two; i will never understand, but to each his own. how old is she, by the way. if she's young it could be that her previous family structure is keeping her from moving-on from the attention she's recieving from your husband(daddy)-- daddy issues. see what i mean.
i mean... who gets invited and decides to just crash at your house for sex, and then stay for an extended period of time without being formally invited?
I guess her family is a bunch of druggies she don't want to be around
like i said. she had issues before stumbling across your doorstep. she felt connected to you guys in some way, and doesn't want to give that up. she needs professional help. your husband stringing her along like that is cruel also. he likes the attention she's giving him. clearly, she has emotional issues dealing with neglect from her family. you said it yourself- you're normal people. she's equating physical love(sex), with emotional love(caring). these are two very seperate things. psychologically healthy adults are able to differentiate between the two. it seems this girl is not mature enough to delve into the threesome thing without being able to detach emotionally from the other partners. your hubby needs to be a man and end it before seriously hurting, not only you, but this person as well. he's being a jerk right now.
Him and her were facebook friends and communicated for a couple months before ever meeting her in person. He's very firm on knowing someone well before we go that route. She was actually very good friends in high school w/ his old best friends little bro, and that's how the connection on fb was made. According to what she said, she had a very good relationship w/ her dad, but he died 2 or 3 yrs. ago. Though she has said several times "I'm only doing what u told me to do." (He's told her before to lose his number and forget where we live, and she didn't call for almost 2 days.) At first she seemed very fine, normal, etc. But when she didn't leave, I began to wonder why. We had to tell her we are married, and need and want alone time, and u need to go home. She is 29: Posted via Mobile Device
Re: are they in the beginning of EA? 
that should've been a red flag right there. i'm not judging you, but why would a third person bring more intimacy to a marriage made for two; i will never understand, but to each his own. how old is she, by the way. if she's young it could be that her previous family structure is keeping her from moving-on from the attention she's recieving from your husband(daddy)-- daddy issues. see what i mean.
