08-08-2011, 10:23 AM
Join Date: Aug 2011
| | Almost 1 year out from D-Day-what a year! Have hope it will get better!!
I am new to this forum; my husband has been on since May and has gotten so much help from all of you- thank you for that! A little history... We were the fairy tale to most everyone who knew us! We met on a blind date in HS, dated 7 years going to different colleges far apart, lived in home town 1 year before we got engaged, now married 13.5 years. He was and thankfully still is my best friend! I believed we had a great marriage. We had our daughter last summer(second child) and I was so happy! I had no idea what was about to hit me. One night, his phone chimed with a text; I looked over (was sitting in his lap) and casually asked who it was. He freaked out and grabbed it; he didn't know at the time how to hide text preview! When he sat down to tell me it was the last thing I thought could be going on- naive, I know! I fell apart!!! He had an EA with old girlfriend who found him on FB for 7 weeks! They told each other ILY-killed me to read! I felt like my whole world was blown apart- so numb! He told me everything which I really appreciate now. It has been such a tough year, but I have become a stronger person in so many ways. I am more confident now, crazy, I know! We communicate now, flirt again, and make time for each other! We didn't realize we weren't working on our marriage anymore at all! I now view this experience as a blessing in disguise. We wouldn't be where we are had it not happened. It was and still is very hard, but we have a deeper, stronger love as a result! I am lucky that it only lasted 7 weeks with no physical contact, but the emotional connection was hard to deal with too!! He has struggled with this all terribly-paid a huge emotional price, but he is also healing! The talk about it being a drug has helped us both to understand his actions and feelings. I know we will continue to have good and bad days! He just sent me a text that he got a call from a blocked number with no vm. It is OW b'day today; sure it was her-she won't let go! It is a process, but we are winning!! The good thing is we have trust! I know he loves me and will continue to struggle with the whole event, and I believe that he feels like he can really confide in me about all of it. He has also realized just how much I love him through my actions in dealing with it! Please know it can work if you love each other and are willing to work to regain trust! I am nervous about d-day, lots of emotions wrapped up in it- and OW is crazy
I am confident we will get past it all together and continue to make our marriage better. Good luck to all of you who are unfortunately beginning the process of rebuilding! I wish I had the benefit of this site a year ago! I know I will continue to use it for strength and encouragement! Posted via Mobile Device