What do you do when someone is cheating?
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Old 08-08-2011, 12:21 PM   #1 (permalink)
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Default What do you do when someone is cheating?

Months ago I discovered by boyfriend was cheating on me. No one confessed his sins and everyone we hung out with knew. How come no one told me? Eventually I asked his cousin's girlfriend point blank and she said, "I was sworn to secrecy."

Now I am curious, what determines whether or not you tell someone their mate is cheating? And if your mate was cheating, would you want to know?

You can either answer via this survey: To Tell or Not to Tell
or you can just answer the questions below. Thanks in advance for replying.

1a. You discover that your friend's mate is cheating on your close friend. What do you do?
A) Talk to the cheater? What would you tell him or her?
B) Tell the person that is getting cheated on? What would you say?
C) Do nothing? Why?

CAREFUL! 1a and 1b. ARE TWO DIFFERENT QUESTIONS. READ THEM CAREFULLY!

1b. You discover that your friend is cheating on his or her mate. What do you do?
A) Talk to the cheater? What would you tell him or her?
B) Tell the person that is getting cheated on? What would you say?
C) Do nothing? Why?

2. If your significant other was cheating on you, would you want someone to tell you?

3. Anything you want to share?

4. Are you male or female

I guess the relationship could have ended worse. I could have gotten pregnant or I could have been strung along for longer time. I'll count my blessing even though I miss the jerk.
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Old 08-08-2011, 12:27 PM   #2 (permalink)
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Default Re: What do you do when someone is cheating?

1a.
B
Say, "Friend, your SO is cheating on you." and provide proof

1b.
A
"Friend, I know you are cheating on your SO and you need to tell them about and cut off the cheating. Iwill not have any part of the affair/cheating."

2. Yes

3. Betrayal sucks

4. Female
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Old 08-08-2011, 12:35 PM   #3 (permalink)
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Default Re: What do you do when someone is cheating?

Cheaters are POS, people that enable cheaters are POS.
Scorched earth policy here, f~ck them all let God sort it out.
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Old 08-08-2011, 01:00 PM   #4 (permalink)
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Default Re: What do you do when someone is cheating?

1a.
2 answers
A) I know you are cheating on your partner and you need to tell them. If you do not I will.
B) If the cheater doesn't fess up then I would say 'Your partner is cheating on you. Let me buy you a beer'.


1b.
A) Tell my friend what they are doing is wrong and hurtful. Help them get to the place to become honest and push them there until they tell the truth.


2. Yes.

3. What Jellybeans said.

4. Female
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Old 08-08-2011, 01:26 PM   #5 (permalink)
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Default Re: What do you do when someone is cheating?

I'm with the guy - people who watch you suffer and walk into fire when they could have helped are called enemies not friends. If I had a cheating friend I'd tell him to get his sh!t together and if he didn't I'd tell his spouse (and pull back on my friendship with him). If I knew a friend's spouse was cheating on him, I'd outright tell him.

I think before I was cheated on my answers would have been less certain, but now I am crystal clear on it.
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Old 08-08-2011, 01:33 PM   #6 (permalink)
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Default Re: What do you do when someone is cheating?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Lon View Post
I'm with the guy - people who watch you suffer and walk into fire when they could have helped are called enemies not friends. If I had a cheating friend I'd tell him to get his sh!t together and if he didn't I'd tell his spouse (and pull back on my friendship with him). If I knew a friend's spouse was cheating on him, I'd outright tell him.

I think before I was cheated on my answers would have been less certain, but now I am crystal clear on it.


After 25 years together, none of his (and I thought my friends as well) had the cojones to tell me. It was the SO of one of his friends that respected me enough to tell me the straight out truth. She understood because she had gone through the same thing.
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