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post #106 of 115 (permalink) Old 09-21-2011, 11:34 AM
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Re: OM found murdered

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Originally Posted by morituri View Post
"I hope he divorces your sorry as* and finds himself another woman". .
Now that has happened, the karma bus did indeed run over your ex-W, Mori. Considering that you previously stated to me that you believed her to be genuinely remorseful, the above statement coming true is even more a sad reminder to your ex-W of the destruction of infidelity.

Back to the karma bus - I wouldn't be jumping for joy over this guy being murdered, and I'm glad to hear that you aren't either. There are very few people that I was "glad" to see dead. They were all related to my military service. But at the end of the day, it makes me realize how fortunate I am to be okay - something about joy over anothers death makes me feel like I'm asking for misfortune myself.

If there is anything to be glad about this situation (perhaps thankful is a better word) is that your ex-W had ended the affair over a year ago, she was not involved with him as he got into further bad sh*t , and that she is at home with family, hopefully receiving the treatment she needs to be healthy again and not anywhere near this guy when it all went down.

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post #107 of 115 (permalink) Old 09-21-2011, 11:39 AM
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Re: OM found murdered

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Originally Posted by Jellybeans View Post
Mori--I'm not surprised your ex did not tell her friend all the information. She was probably deeply ashamed by what she did.



I don't understand how some folks who say the OM and OW aren't accountable either. Granted, they did not take a vow, but like you said, they know full well that what they are doing is wrong. Again, you can't hav ea betrayal without a third party. As stated a gajillion (is that word?) times, 99% of the time, the OM and OW know the person they are engaging with is married/in a relationship. So they are aware. If they continue after the fact, then they are willfully participating in the betrayal. And even if they do not know, it is STILL an affair is the other person is married. However, none of this absolves the married person. They can either choose to shut it down so it does not happen or go through with the affair.



I have head this as well before. How for some OM, the ultimate conquest is bedding a married woman. They get off on it. It's a high.

By the same token, there are OW who operate with this in mind, too. They get a sick pleasure out of knowing they are sleeping with married men. I read recently on a website where as woman was posting that she had an A with a married man, he left his wife for her, lived with her for 2 years, and then he had gone back to his wife and she was distraught. She kept saying how she "knew" it was so very wrong but she loved him and now she felt like a loser now knowing he went back to his wife and something to the effect of "I always felt like it was a competition and I was winning since he left her to be with me...and now I feel like I lost... like she's the victorious one." Then she said how her self-esteem was totally shot and how she ultimately felt bad for the wife since it's clear he wasn't committed to her if he left her. But then how awful she felt he left her to be with his wife...he told her that he couldn't just up and leave her. And the OW said something like "I don't get why it's so hard to leave... eventually his kids will learn to love him again and their anger will die down, he will repair things with his family, his wife will get over it, and his sick father (who by the way, the wife cared for as he lived in the marital home with the wife!) can be fine on his own!!! and how leaving a house/finances behind were not that big of a deal--they were just "things" that can be replaced. Yes, she used the world "replaced."

But I digress. Entrop made some good points.

Mori--it's prob best for you not to know and the thing is, you probably will never know everything. I've recently spoken with my exH and found out all kinds of new sh!t. But he still will not tell me her name. Stupid, right? We're divorced now! He claims he can't remember. That he truly forgot and cannot remember her name at all. I told him "It's funny you can't remember the name of the woman you betrayed me with." I think it's safe to say at this point he will probably never tell me.
None of this is gender specific. Agreed.
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post #108 of 115 (permalink) Old 09-21-2011, 11:53 AM
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Re: OM found murdered

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Like someone else referenced, the Unfaithful movie with Richard Gere is a good example and that stuff really does happen IRL.
I was watching his movie the other night "Internal Affairs". He played a seriously evil dude who preyed on women. Yeah it was a movie but there are folks at the extreme end who think that way.
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post #109 of 115 (permalink) Old 09-21-2011, 12:12 PM
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Re: OM found murdered

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of course I have compassion... because he is a human... simply a man... full of flaws and faults like the rest of us...

Psalms 35:13-14

But as for me, when they were sick (in this case mind), my clothing (my own life) was sackcloth: I humbled my soul with fasting; and my prayer returned into mine own bosom. I behaved myself as though he had been my friend or brother: I bowed down heavily, as one that mourneth for his mother.

I can never ever imagine a time where I could EVER rejoice in the death of another... it is so utterly completely disrespectful to mankind and humanity...

I was immediately taken aback by the venom, utter lack of compassion, self-righteous attitudes of some posters... however I now can understand it is born of hurt and pain, ...this website is dedicated to it. I wish you all peace and healing...
Schlock! we aren't talking rejoicing here, we are talking about being satisfied that justice is done by the universe from time to time. Why is there more understanding and "compassion" for a person who knowingly sets out to hurt and humble, another? The OW in my H's life knew he was married ( big wedding ring; lots of talk about wife and fam) but it just seemed to make her more determined. She is studying to be a MC for crying out loud! If she isn't responsible for her actions then who in the hell is? Do I hold her responsible? You bet I do, and if she got hit by a bus, I would be relieved that another wife would never have to go through what I have, at her initiation. This is a selfish and hurtful person; out to prove that she can urinate in other people's corn flakes. There has been some quoting of scripture. Here is one to consider: "And the man that committeth adultery with another man's wife, even he that committeth adultery with his neighbour's wife, the adulterer and the adulteress shall surely be put to death. Leviticus 20:10." The Bible is very vindictive too and has "an utter lack of compassion" when it comes to adultery. Seducing another person's life partner is a purposeful assault on the rights and dignity of an innocent person, "compassion" for such a person is in my opinion, misplaced, especially when there is an "utter lack of compassion" for the injured spouse and family on the part of the transgressor. My H is very remorseful, he would take it all back if he could. He's told me that, over and over again, and I believe him, she on the other hand, has said "I don't care about you, or your family," , and I believe her too. Will she do this again if she gets the chance? What do you think?
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post #110 of 115 (permalink) Old 09-21-2011, 12:48 PM
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Re: OM found murdered

Oak -- It's not suprising the OW said she doesn't care about you or your family. If she did, she would not have had an affair with your husband.
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post #111 of 115 (permalink) Old 09-21-2011, 01:05 PM
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Re: OM found murdered

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Oak -- It's not suprising the OW said she doesn't care about you or your family. If she did, she would not have had an affair with your husband.
Yep, and I'm not inclined to cut her any slack.
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post #112 of 115 (permalink) Old 01-09-2012, 09:38 PM
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Re: OM found murdered

Sorry for the bump but I wonder if you spoke to your ex wife about this
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post #113 of 115 (permalink) Old 01-09-2012, 09:55 PM
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Re: OM found murdered

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How unfortunate. I would have hoped for bone cancer, rabies, brain eating amoebas
I just googled "brain eating amoebas" thinking there couldn't possibly be any such thing...

I was wrong...

http://http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Naegleria_fowleri

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post #114 of 115 (permalink) Old 04-13-2017, 08:18 PM
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Re: OM found murdered

Bump.

One of the great classic threads, authored by one of my heroes Morituri.
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post #115 of 115 (permalink) Old 04-14-2017, 11:54 AM
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Re: OM found murdered

Too bad the main stream media has become so bland that when an OM is murdered they will only make a vague statement about an estranged wife.

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