09-25-2011, 02:07 PM
Join Date: Aug 2010
| | Re: An idea for those who are reconciling.
That is a great idea and when we refreshed our wedding ring, I still have a hard time putting it on.
I wore it all through the vow renewal day, and keep it on for most of the week while we were in Vegas, but after a very succeesful R I feel like the purdon of wearing it has lost its meaning.
Yes the "purdon" it has always annoyed me, I would play with it all the time. and it just bugged me.
As I have had a pretty easy time of it (the R) , my wife has done all the heavy lifting and the only struggle I have is maintaining the healthy behaviors *I* need to stay in this /or any relationship.
I find my self reverting back to booty call type intimacy and indifferent emotions that lead to my marital wows long ago.
I know that the wedding ring should have some significance but I just see it as it is just as important as the new behaviors we both need to exhibit.
Not to take any thing away from your thread and yes it (the rings be refreshed) was a significant jesture at the time I still wish see never cheated....I'd still be waering it as it irritaaded my diget.
I bet your 1st question is have I truelly forgiven her? Yes I have forgiven her but the ring still just buggs the hell out of my finger.LOL
I guess my only point is that along with jestures and significant objects there has to be a overwhelming behavioral change by both spouses that reflect a succesful R.
As far as the rings go they were beat up after 20 years and now they look great, they most likely will stay that way as they both sit in the dresser draw...only to be taken out on special occasions.