Re: Not your typical
I now have a better understanding of how things are there. So, this OM must have known for a while that your wife gets kind of sexually reckless without remembering much afterwards time to time due to her drug use. It would not be difficult to pick up on such things and he just took advantage of it. Also, because of her such history, you are not 100% sure how much to blame the OM even for the makeout session they had that night.
You know, this kind of blackout of memory loss during drinking with or without drug, once it starts, tend to get worse and worse. I used to drink, I used to have my memory intact even while heavily toxicated, but once I experienced blackout, it started to occur more and more readily everytime I drank. And, it is a scary experience not remembering what I said or did the next morning. So, I stopped drinking altogether, except some wine and beer once in a while.
First of all, your wife must stop drinking. She cannot trust herself let alone you as her husband. Secondly, the OM couple must be cut off from your social network. He knew how your wife was and he took advantage of her. Although she may have been influenced by the drug and alcohol and lost her inhibition, but he certainly was fully aware of what he was doing. Actually, I have suspicion, he was kind of looking for something with your wife all along. They might have talked about sneaking together to do something like this before you guys went to bed.
The weird thing is that although you cannot remember things said and done during blackout the next day, while in blackout you do sort of talk, scheme, and act out with awareness of surroundings, although drunk. Although she may not remember the next day, she and OM could have schemed together this secret midnight rendezvous before she even went to bed with you. People often become this total different persona while in this blackout period. As if drug-induced split personality of some kind.