would you kiss or have sex in revenge?

Mommybean · 03-04-2009, 01:28 PM

What purpose does revenge have really? From everything I have read, you are just as in the wrong as he was. You both were disrespectful of your marriage...he by kissing the friend and you by playing strip poker. HOW on Earth did you think that was appropriate?
Face facts..things will NEVER go back to the way "they were", and honestly look at where THAT got you anyways. It just seems that you want to focus so much on your husbands behavior so that you DON'T have to focus on yours. If the tables were turned and he was the one acting how you are now, would his behavior cause you to try to work harder on your marriage, or would it push you farther away?
I've been cheated on. The BEST thing I realized was that *I* chose to stay and because that was my choice, I had to let the anger and fear go. It was pushing my husband away and that was SO very counterproductive to working things out.
Your life will never be the same.Get used to it. Find new friends if you need to, ones that are as respectful of the boundaries in their relationships as you NEED to be in yours in order to get things going in a positive direction.

sunflower · 03-04-2009, 02:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mommybean

What purpose does revenge have really? From everything I have read, you are just as in the wrong as he was. You both were disrespectful of your marriage...he by kissing the friend and you by playing strip poker. HOW on Earth did you think that was appropriate?
Face facts..things will NEVER go back to the way "they were", and honestly look at where THAT got you anyways. It just seems that you want to focus so much on your husbands behavior so that you DON'T have to focus on yours. If the tables were turned and he was the one acting how you are now, would his behavior cause you to try to work harder on your marriage, or would it push you farther away?
I've been cheated on. The BEST thing I realized was that *I* chose to stay and because that was my choice, I had to let the anger and fear go. It was pushing my husband away and that was SO very counterproductive to working things out.
Your life will never be the same.Get used to it. Find new friends if you need to, ones that are as respectful of the boundaries in their relationships as you NEED to be in yours in order to get things going in a positive direction.

I absolutly agree with you we were very young and stupid in how we acted I dont know why I think that what I did was not as wrong? I guess cause so many people said that it wasnt wrong that it was all in fun and games and well when you kiss someone thats differant so I tried to go off that? I dont know I know we both messed up I just hope he knows what he wants now cause I know what I want. I would hate to be heartbroken twice.

wanttobehappy · 03-11-2009, 03:03 PM

I have thought about it just so he can feel the hurt I'm feeling, but I could never do it

!! I'm not crazy!!! I think??

sunflower · 03-11-2009, 05:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by wanttobehappy

I have thought about it just so he can feel the hurt I'm feeling, but I could never do it

!! I'm not crazy!!! I think??

HA I hear ya that ummm am I crazy? lol I get that all the time and sometimes people look at me and even him looking at me I feel like they think I am losing my mind!

wanttobehappy · 03-11-2009, 05:39 PM

Dont think you are crazy just think if i did that am i crazy!! Yes I would..It would make my situation worse!

sunflower · 03-12-2009, 11:21 AM

Aint that the truth! and you get to that point and you are like I just cant not after how I felt I just cant!