Some citizens do call the cops to stand by why they retrieve their property from the residence. They were there to keep the peace. It normal procedure and happens all the time. She most likely said that she fears she will be hurt or something. Cops get called to do this all the time. Its a pain in the ass.
Lordmayhem is correct. I actually texted W's father prior to them coming over and asked that he let me know if they planned to so I could have an officer stand by to prevent any false accusations. She is accusing me of physical assault on her and trying to use old bruises that she had told me came from working out at gym but I suspect may have come from rough play with OM. She also told cops during both incidents yesterday that I had assaulted her and made threats to kill her and she feared for her life and life of my son! NONE of which is true!
Brief update. Without going into too much detail, simply bc I think W may know about this blog, which is why I deleted original (I don't know if she screenshot it, but if not, I didn't want her to have access to my playbook, so to speak!) the light at the end of the tunnel is getting brighter! I still hurt that my wife broke her vows and is in an affair, but strangely, I think the worst of the pain from that is past me now. I'm still hurt that she has my daughter and that she may somehow take my son as well, but I will deal with that as I can. For now I can only focus on things I can control. I have done some detective work on my own, and think I may have some physical proof of the affair! I should know within the next 48 hours if I do. If it happens like I hope and pray it will, it should be the final nail I need to have the upper hand in a divorce and custody trial! Even if it turns out to be nothing, I still have the other evidence that may be enough by itself, but this final piece should dispel any doubts or arguments her atty may make! Keep your fingers crossed and wish me luck!
Talked to my manager at work today and she told me that they will be able to accomodate any schedule changes that I might need to make in the event I do end up with custody of my kids. Currently I work a weird 13 hour a day schedule that keeps me at work all day Sat, Sun and Mon. I've worked it for over 3 years bc it meant I could take care of my son who isn't in kindergarten yet. It saved my wife and I about $700/month, but also meant that I missed out on at least two opportunities I've had to enter a special training program that is required in order to be promoted, bc it required a flexible schedule.
I sacrificed my career for our family and it allowed my wife's career to flourish. If I were a woman and she the man, that in itself is cause for requesting alimony. Don't know how courts view it when its the other way around though. It still seems that courts tend to favor women over men in these types of cases, but its much better than it was even 10 years ago!
I'm trying to stay positive. Its hard sometimes, but I'm trying to let go of things I can't control and focus on what I CAN do!
Did get some good news on the financial front. My budget for a car and atty is double what I thought it might be! I could still use more, but at least I know now that I've got enough to start the ball rolling without having to sell a kidney!
Make sure she is paying her share of household bills. Good luck and work out often. Its great for the mental aspect as well as the physical.
She's already said that if and when she moves out, she isn't paying anything towards the household! She says her atty said she doesn't have to. I don't know if her atty really said that or not, but I'll be bringing that up to my atty when we meet.
One thing working in my favor, she is lying to EVERYONE about this. She has a habit of setting things in her mind so that not only tells a different version of the reality, but actually seems to BELIEVE what she is saying! I have a hard time believing that she has told her atty she is actually having an affair. More than likely she has simply told him that she wants a divorce bc I'm not the perfect husband. I'm also certain, based on the lies she's told the police and others, that she is telling her atty that I'm abusive or a threat to her or our children. Ironically, in all of our years together, the only times there has been any physical assault, its been her hitting me. (Or trying to run me and my son over with the car the other day!) I have a feeling that when everything comes out in court, her atty is going to be doing a lot of damage control on the fly!
It still seems that courts tend to favor women over men in these types of cases, but its much better than it was even 10 years ago!!
In my state there is a simple table that you enter in both incomes, the number of children, who has them what percentage of the time, a few other things, and then it computes who owes who. One party will try to argue why they shouldn't have to pay that much. An attorney can answer all of that.
And you are the luckiest guy in the world living in NC. Adultry is a big NO NO in North Carolina. She could be in deep **** if you can prove it.
She's already said that if and when she moves out, she isn't paying anything towards the household! She says her atty said she doesn't have to. I don't know if her atty really said that or not, but I'll be bringing that up to my atty when we meet.
One thing working in my favor, she is lying to EVERYONE about this. She has a habit of setting things in her mind so that not only tells a different version of the reality, but actually seems to BELIEVE what she is saying! I have a hard time believing that she has told her atty she is actually having an affair. More than likely she has simply told him that she wants a divorce bc I'm not the perfect husband. I'm also certain, based on the lies she's told the police and others, that she is telling her atty that I'm abusive or a threat to her or our children. Ironically, in all of our years together, the only times there has been any physical assault, its been her hitting me. (Or trying to run me and my son over with the car the other day!) I have a feeling that when everything comes out in court, her atty is going to be doing a lot of damage control on the fly!
She's either lying or she hasn't even seen an attorney. She can't just bail on her responsibilities.
Don't remember her trying to run you all over. You should be keeping notes, recording everything on video or var. Apply for a RO. The more you have the more you will get. Get counseling for you and kids, meds, line up family and friends as allies.
She's already said that if and when she moves out, she isn't paying anything towards the household! She says her atty said she doesn't have to. I don't know if her atty really said that or not, but I'll be bringing that up to my atty when we meet.
My friend's divorce attorney advised him that his wife is liable for half the mortgage since she moved out a year ago, and they're gonna go after her for it.
Welcome to the world of divorce and custody---just protect yourself, stick to your guns, and make sure you have a BULLDOG, for an atty.
You very likely can get joint custody, pay no alimony, and just split the assets, make sure she pays her fair share of the upkeep until your D. is final, if that's the way you decide to go
One thing working in my favor, she is lying to EVERYONE about this. She has a habit of setting things in her mind so that not only tells a different version of the reality, but actually seems to BELIEVE what she is saying! I have a hard time believing that she has told her atty she is actually having an affair.
Playing armchair psychiatrist here, but she sounds like she is bipolar. Maybe you just need to proceed as though she is. Luckily (how can I say that?), my wife has a spectrum bipolar condition that is just on the depressive spectrum, but one of our biggest issues is the 'little' fantasies that become her reality. When you deal with custody and visitation, watch yourself, even based on what you've said so far. Explain bruises on the kids to family members, so it doesn't begin to support a new charge of hers. Recognize that her lawyers reality in the divorce will be different from the truth, so encourage your lawyer to speak to him about major issues, if possible, because most lawyers do not like the idea of being played the fool. And most importantly, based on what you've already told us about her, recognize that her parents and friends could potentially have a completely different view of you than you think. I'm not talking about just how they will automatically take her side, but that when the affair first began, she could've begun to feed them doses of her lies. If they've 'known' that you were an abusive father for many months, her recent actions can seem quite justified.
She is definitely bi-polar, as is her mother. Hoping that little gene skips my daughter!
I will be fighting for full physical custody of my children. I have no problem with my wife having access to our kids, but I don't want her to have them living with her at any time while the OM may be there visiting, spending night, or moving in! Also, with her irrational behaviors, I don't trust her around the kids. Not that I think she would hurt them, but I do think she will tell them lies about me to try to get sympathy from them or paint me in a bad light. Of course, now that I think about it, if she thought she was going to lose the kids, who knows what she might do? You see stuff in the news all the time about women snapping and hurting their kids. But I'm not going to play that game. I have to believe her love for our kids is greater than her need to hurt me.
Found out today that she has taken her Facebook account off. I'm wondering if I should go ahead and post anything there about what's going on? Also maybe a link to OM's page? Maybe I should wait to talk to atty before I do anything. Its so hard to wait, bc I want to lash out, but I know that may not be the best thing. I don't want a small taste of revenge and lose sight of the main goal, which is to have my children in a safe, loving, LOYAL home! I want to teach them good morals, self respect, and a sense of honor.
Found out today that she has taken her Facebook account off. I'm wondering if I should go ahead and post anything there about what's going on? Also maybe a link to OM's page? Maybe I should wait to talk to atty before I do anything. Its so hard to wait, bc I want to lash out, but I know that may not be the best thing.
She may have just blocked you, in which case it will appear to not even exist. Create a new page and you can see it if she still has it. Or get someone else to see if it's still up. Posted via Mobile Device
Re: Wife having a PA 
