Hurt, go dark except for the kids. She seems to be over dramatic and in need of too much attention. The best thing you can fo for you, and the thing which will get to her most, is your pulling that away.
As much as I want you to be happy, realize that the kids are hers too and she will have time with them. Except for her outbursts and act against you, she hadn't done anything to anyone else. So your not going to get exclusive control and you aren't going to get her declared incompetent etc.
So get that atnny at find a path through this. You will need to give her access to your son, and she will have to give you access to your daughter. They are kids nit bargaining chips.
Be armed with knowledge, facts, good advice, and strategy. Know that she will trash talk you to your kids. She will and you can't stop her. At this point divorce his to get her out of your life do you can begin to heal. It is not to punish her. The punishment will come when she finds the OM throwing her under the bus to save his own butt at home and the office. Posted via Mobile Device
She's already said that if and when she moves out, she isn't paying anything towards the household! She says her atty said she doesn't have to. I don't know if her atty really said that or not, but I'll be bringing that up to my atty when we meet.
One thing working in my favor, she is lying to EVERYONE about this. She has a habit of setting things in her mind so that not only tells a different version of the reality, but actually seems to BELIEVE what she is saying! I have a hard time believing that she has told her atty she is actually having an affair. More than likely she has simply told him that she wants a divorce bc I'm not the perfect husband. I'm also certain, based on the lies she's told the police and others, that she is telling her atty that I'm abusive or a threat to her or our children. Ironically, in all of our years together, the only times there has been any physical assault, its been her hitting me. (Or trying to run me and my son over with the car the other day!) I have a feeling that when everything comes out in court, her atty is going to be doing a lot of damage control on the fly!
I am not sure how it works in NC but I do know in Michigan the spouse that stays in the house can go after status quo with the person who leaves the house. By doing this it forces the spouse who is leaving to take care of whatever share of the bills they where before they left until the divorce is final. It is something that needs to be filed for quickly after the spouse leaves the home.
She may have just blocked you, in which case it will appear to not even exist. Create a new page and you can see it if she still has it. Or get someone else to see if it's still up. Posted via Mobile Device
Hurt, go dark except for the kids. She seems to be over dramatic and in need of too much attention. The best thing you can fo for you, and the thing which will get to her most, is your pulling that away.
As much as I want you to be happy, realize that the kids are hers too and she will have time with them. Except for her outbursts and act against you, she hadn't done anything to anyone else. So your not going to get exclusive control and you aren't going to get her declared incompetent etc.
So get that atnny at find a path through this. You will need to give her access to your son, and she will have to give you access to your daughter. They are kids nit bargaining chips.
Be armed with knowledge, facts, good advice, and strategy. Know that she will trash talk you to your kids. She will and you can't stop her. At this point divorce his to get her out of your life do you can begin to heal. It is not to punish her. The punishment will come when she finds the OM throwing her under the bus to save his own butt at home and the office. Posted via Mobile Device
I disagree. She tried to run him over with their 5 year old in his arms. Posted via Mobile Device
1. My insider talked to some people at the office today. It appears her story of the OM telling the entire office I contacted him was a lie. Assuming that her story of getting pulled into HR were a lie as well.
2. Their lunch trips to the gym seem to last 2-3 hours on some days. Since the office is right across the street from the gym, and my wife's normal workout is usually only an hour, I'm left to wonder where they are and what they are doing the other 1-2 hours they are gone.
3. My wife's business trip to Chicago for the NACS convention should have ended on Tuesday. Everyone else in the office that attended left Chicago on Tuesday. Guess who the only two people are that stayed an extra night? Yep, you got it! My W and the OM! It should be easy to subpoena their business expense reports from work, I should think.
Still waiting on my "smoking gun" info to come in. I should have an answer within the next hour or two. Keep your fingers crossed!
Got the call I've been waiting for. Its not quite the slam dunk that I had hoped, but it does give me physical evidence of them together on multiple occasions outside of work when she had lied to me about what she was doing. I also have a witness who saw them hugging and kissing! Was hoping for a little bit more, but with what I already have, it may be enough.
Now I just need to wait and see what my attorney says on Wednesday.
Yeah, I've already decided that wouldn't be a good idea, as much as I might enjoy it.
I've come to the conclusion that my marriage is over. I don't want my wife back, and would not take her back if she came crawling and begging. My sole focus now is getting my kids and securing financial support from W to care for them.
There is no way your wife or the OM told the truth at work.
Don't wait for your attorney. This fantasy will die very quickly if follow the steps required to break this affair.
You do an exposure to his wife , their co-workers, her parents and his parents . Regardless if you think the marriage is over his wife may not and I am certain going forward you do not want your children in contact with this man.
At the same time send letters to the Chairman , Head of HR, his Manager and hers, therein you state they are using company time and resources to conduct their affair.
A sample of a company letter from the MB site
Quote:
To Whom It May Concern:
This letter is to bring a matter to your attention that may be a violation of your Company's Code of Conduct and/or other policies, procedures and business ethics.
WS and WS are involved in an extramarital affair that is taking place, in the workplace. Aside from the potential sexual harassment claims and any other future legal dilemmas that this situation may present, it also involves the inappropriate use of company resources and assets. WS and WS are using company time and company resources to further their affair. If you check the call histories on their office and cell phones along with their workstation computers and the interoffice instant messaging service, you will find the two of them are spending an inordinate amount of what should be productive work time to further their sexual relationship.
I have retained legal counsel to help guide me through this process and I expect that this will be handled with the upmost care and discretion. If you have any questions, please call me at xxx-xxxx. Otherwise, I will anticipate a response from you once you have investigated these concerns and taken appropriate corrective action.
-BS
cc: [Director of Gen’l Counsel, Legal]
[VP Senior Manager of Security]
Step back and wait for the fallout.
Once exposed focus on you and the children.
A flag for you, if you sit back and wait for your attorney you will lose the initiative. The attorney's focus is to protect you financially secure your children and try get you primary custody.
If you have evidence it is not slander , people do not get prosecuted for exposing affairs , imagine if he was stupid enough to try that . He would be in court with your wife having to admit to cheating , waywards don't want publicity . Posted via Mobile Device
There is no way your wife or the OM told the truth at work.
Don't wait for your attorney. This fantasy will die very quickly if follow the steps required to break this affair.
You do an exposure to his wife , their co-workers, her parents and his parents . Regardless if you think the marriage is over his wife may not and I am certain going forward you do not want your children in contact with this man.
At the same time send letters to the Chairman , Head of HR, his Manager and hers, therein you state they are using company time and resources to conduct their affair.
A sample of a company letter from the MB site
Step back and wait for the fallout.
Once exposed focus on you and the children.
A flag for you, if you sit back and wait for your attorney you will lose the initiative. The attorney's focus is to protect you financially secure your children and try get you primary custody.
Posted via Mobile Device
Other Man has played you and your wife for fools. Just because you don't want your wife back doesn't mean you reward OM with a free ride. Affairs SHOULD have consequences. He's borken up two familes just so he could get in bed with your wife. Bring this sh!t crashing down on him.
The judge isn't going to be fair but that doesn't mean you can't be. Let him have it.
Look at what he's done to your children, enough said.
If you have evidence it is not slander , people do not get prosecuted for exposing affairs , imagine if he was stupid enough to try that . He would be in court with your wife having to admit to cheating , waywards don't want publicity . Posted via Mobile Device
Re: Wife having a PA 
