Pretty Much Have Lost It

Dadof3 · 01-11-2012, 12:07 PM

Ever heard of clonazepam? recommend you get to a Doc - tell them about your marital stress and anxiety. They may put you on an antidepressant (get a good one) and maybe some clonazepam / lorezepam for the time between now and when the anti-depressant kicks in with full force.

It helped me a lot when I started dealing with my W's EA and walk-away planning half a year ago. It probably made all the difference in the world. I didn't freak out when I was on it. Just made me a "happy" little drunk.

I don't drink, smoke, or do drugs. If thats what "drunk" feels like, very interesting!

Initfortheduration · 01-11-2012, 12:10 PM

That's because you are being reactive with her. You are worried about what she is going to do. You need to be concerned about what you're going to do. When that becomes your priority (happiness, self respect, confidence), your confusion will clear.

DailyGrind · 01-11-2012, 02:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Iwant2bhappy

You need to quit doing this to yourself. Why continue to spy and be paranoid about everything?

You either need to trust her and hope things work out or just let her go. Spying is only hurting you and driving you CRAZY.

It has been over a year and you still have not found any concrete evidence, so why are you doing this to yourself?

Well..not exactly true. I found her emails to another guy...which I think I stopped. I found her talking to someone on her trips home.....someone at work. She is suddenly (after working there for 3 years) leaving about an hour later (a couple times a bit more) from work. Tonight...she said she needed to work a bit later to "clean up her office." Really??? Who works over, just to clean up their office?? That's kinda what triggered it for me.

But...you are right....the spying is what's driving me crazy. OTOH...the spying is what caught the EA beginning with the guy from DD's dance class.

DailyGrind · 01-11-2012, 03:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Iwant2bhappy

I work over to clean my office because I get so busy during the day, I need to get organized.

Maybe it is time to just call it quits. Why spend your life worrying about her having an EA or PA? Your wasting your life away. 2 years is to long to be living like that.

Fair point.
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chapparal · 01-11-2012, 03:28 PM

You said she was going to work early and leaving late a while back. Is this a regular thing now? How often? Does she still workout with the other man?

DailyGrind · 01-11-2012, 03:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by chapparal

You said she was going to work early and leaving late a while back. Is this a regular thing now? How often? Does she still workout with the other man?

I pretty much took care of the kids through the Holidays (I took a lot of time off.). She was working over quite a bit during then. But it was pretty much not the case for her to do so before. Oddly, she has not worked out AT ALL over the past three weeks. Not sure why she stopped.
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chapparal · 01-11-2012, 03:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DailyGrind

I pretty much took care of the kids through the Holidays (I took a lot of time off.). She was working over quite a bit during then. But it was pretty much not the case for her to do so before. Oddly, she has not worked out AT ALL over the past three weeks. Not sure why she stopped.
Posted via Mobile Device

Very interesting, puzzle keeps going off on different tangents.

FourtyPlus · 01-11-2012, 03:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by chapparal

Sounds like a lot and why would a co worker say "Love"?

However, a gift card for a lover? That doesn't sound right either unless it was to pay for a prepaid phone.

I'm not a Lesbian but I have co-workers to whom I'd give $100 because I know they are going through a rough time. I've done it before. Probably wouldn't sign it with "love" but then I'm not "that" close to my coworkers either.

chapparal · 01-11-2012, 03:38 PM

You never did gps her car or phone right?

Dadof3 · 01-11-2012, 03:43 PM

Chap - I think DG GPS'd her phone, but she knows about it, so its ineffective.

Halien · 01-11-2012, 03:57 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DailyGrind

Just found this piece of paper in W's lunchbag....anyone know what it might mean?:

@messaging.sprintpcs.com

On back were these numbers:
0060439575
20-0492123

Is this some form of hidden communication?
Posted via Mobile Device

First pass, it just looks like accounting distributions to me. Depends on the size of the company she works for. The first line often means high level division codes, and the second, with the 20, then dash, just looks like a specific buisiness section, then the account. In my company, it would mean that section number 20, in some division, just allocated some overtime, for example, and they need her to make a manual transaction. You said that she works in HR, so I would think that she is dealing with these regularly.

Trojan John · 01-11-2012, 03:59 PM

This isn't a marriage, it's a sitcom. It really seems as if you're addicted to the drama. So am I as I keep reading it...
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JustaJerk · 01-11-2012, 05:40 PM

Whoa! She might be a lesbian now?!

DailyGrind · 01-11-2012, 05:50 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dadof3

Chap - I think DG GPS'd her phone, but she knows about it, so its ineffective.

I don't know if she knew about it. But it wasn't really helping anything....so I removed it. It always showed her at work.....which didn't help me if WORK is where something is going on. We started counseling....so I didn't want to be dishonest that I was still spying on her....if it came up.
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chapparal · 01-11-2012, 05:59 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DailyGrind

I don't know if she knew about it. But it wasn't really helping anything....so I removed it. It always showed her at work.....which didn't help me if WORK is where something is going on. We started counseling....so I didn't want to be dishonest that I was still spying on her....if it came up.
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Good idea.