Okay so before we drown, stone or sufficate the cat, send it over! We used to have 4 and lost one last year. She was my husband's favorite. Come to think of it, he's allergic to cats. LOL, maybe that's why you're getting flak from me.
I'm guessing over the last few years a lot of the fun guy you used to be has been disappearing. The 180 should be helping bring that person back.
Many people think you are not supposed to talk/interact with your WW but that is not what it is about. For example, you have said before,the two of you were already basically doing the 180.
As a matter of fact, you should probably work into just talking to her whether or not she joins in or not. After work, men supposedly need 15/20 min to relax before starting in on family life. Not sure about women. But start a monologue if you have to.
You can talk to her/kids without demanding her participation. Just show her your interested. Make nice comments, clean up after the cat, get her car washed and be happy.
By the way in 27 yrs the only pets I was on board with were my 2 huge German Shepherds (RIP). All the birds, gerbils, cats, cats, and more cats, and more animals were always going to be someone elses responsibility including our latest mini schnauz. Guess who gets almost all the hard,nasty,clean up, burial, work.
I did teach my daughter how to get a dead possum out of the fish pond and into a garbage bag without touching it. She seems to be permanately scarred though she did have the courage to do it. The possum taught me to build a way out of the fish pond for wayward animals. LOL
Anyway, at this point you need to find a way to cheer up/lighten up and be fun to be around no matter how things are going to turn out. Good humor IS contagious.
I would be willing to bet money that if Daily stopped calling the cat names and stopped pushing it away, his wife would start cleaning up cat barf and she might just be so taken by Daily's grand gesture that she starts opening up about a lot of things (that's me assuming she doesn't have an affair, I absolutely believe she's just very unhappy in her marriage and it can be fixed).
I might be totally wrong but we'll never know unless Daily gives it a try.
You do realize that you are talking about a purely hypothetical situation involving a person who is modelled after nothing more than a gender stereotype? This is exactly the same scenario that some of these men on this site encounter when a poster responds by telling them that their saintly, emotionally healthy hypothetical wife only cheated because they obviously had to be failing miserably at meeting her emotional needs.
Why don't we take a step back and talk about what we really know about DG's wife? Recognize that he is the only one who can provide input on what she is like. Hasn't he said that this woman has really never managed to have a relationship that encompassed healthy communication? Maybe you can help DG?
I don't remember everything you've said about her, but based on what I do remember, her normal style seemed to be described as a person who tentatively initiated, but backed off at the first sign of awkwardness. If so, there is a need for a different approach from simply cleaning up cat puke. Call me naive, but it seems that a healthy marriage involves two people who share a responsibility to initiate communication. Over time, it may break down when one person saves the resentment and backs off. The replies here are suggesting that this is where your wife is. It really seems, however, that she forgot about the communication part and just started out with the resentment part. Either way, only DG can provide something that is not a hypothetical straw man.
I never got the idea you mistreated it, on the other hand, you should have said "NO" to getting it. I think you thought it would have made her happier and perhaps change her tune with you a bit.
Well...she got it just before we married. I couldn't say no....I love her. And, to be honest....there were definitely times I played with it. But...it just wasn't my cup of tea. Really...I never MINDED it so much, until about 3 years ago...when it started retching all over the place. Stepped in that crap too often for my liking. Still...I never insisted she get rid of it, or anything. I just found it irritating. I don't really see the cat as much of an issue. I was just puzzled she brought it up on her list.