There is a chance that he decided to friend request the both of you, but could only find your wife. This happens to me often, I’ll go looking for someone specific on facebook and for some reason, I cannot find them. For instance, when I lived in another city 15+ years ago, I had a gay make best friend. We worked together and spent a lot of time together shopping, tanning, getting our hair done, going to lunch, etc. He was the best “girlfriend” I’d ever had! I kept in touch with him for years after I moved back to my home town, then it started dwindling down as long distance contact goes, phone number changes, etc. I looked high and low for him on facebook and could never find him. I mean, I didn’t try constantly, just here and there over the years. I finally found him about a year ago. (this is not a real name, but a similar variation) He always went by Cliff. And he was named after his dad and grandfather, so when he would write his name, he would write Cliff Jones III. When I finally found him, he was listed as Clifford Jones 3. That simple variation was enough to not be able to find him for years.
So there is a SLIGHT chance that he didn’t request you because he couldn’t find you – for some reason. Facebook can be weird like that. How many friends does this guy have? Is he a friend hoarder? Or is his facebook more ‘intimate’. I have friends who work in sales who will friend request ANYONE they interact with on a sales basis. I have quite a few friends who sell cell phones and sell cars. All of them are like that, new customer – they send a friend request. I’ve also noticed that, at least around here, people running for offices are sending out friend requests left and right. I recently became friends with the guy running for county prosecutor. I received a friend request from his opponent as well. I actually received about 5 requests this weekend, all from people running for different offices here in town. I only accepted the one from the guy running for county prosecutor – because he was the prosecuting attorney on the case I sat jury for a few years back – attempted murder – and I have ridiculous respect for him, he did an AMAZING job, and his opponent is a psycho nut job.
However, it could be very possible this guy wants to bang your wife. If he does, I’m sure you’ll start to see signs soon.
The part that bothers me about this is NOT that he friend requested your wife – it’s her REACTION to it. That’s your problem.