loveless25

I have a friend whom i have never met but we've been friends for 4years over d internet. B4 I met my bf we were kind of close and flirtatious. Since I met my bf I stopped the flirting and made it clear we were only friends and we couldnt cross that line. Well Ive been with my bf for 2 yrs 8 months. Hes cheated and hurt me a lot but we have a small child and he stopped cheating, got off his butt and got a high paying job, and now he is working on getting us a house. Well he recently started this job and Igot that gut feeling something is wrong... (he stopped drinking and doing drugs marijauna) for abot 8 months. Anyway he was acting sneaky and coming home late. I come to find out he recently bagan drinking again which landed his ass in jail. it was dismissed. During this time I turn to my friend. We talked about stuff but not my relationship. My bf promised again not to drink or cheat which I dont think he is cheating but he lies a lot! about small things! for what Idk! he lies about where hes at what hes doing etc etc. I have his phone bill account nothing suspicious. I have his e mail password. I have his bank account info everything down to his crdit cards. I can track him. Thats how I know hes lying about where hes at. then he comes home n tells d truth... idk what to think! He confuses me! Im getting tired of the lies and broken promises and I just sick of him making the same mistakes! I talk to my friend almost everyday he makes me laugh and hes a good guy. I dont want anything to happen between us. I love my bf and everything but Im feelin a lil detached. I find myself thinking of my friend. I could never cheat. Is this the beginning of an emotional affair? Should I play it safe n stop talking to my friend? when I try to tell my bf Im upset about his lies and upset about well just whatever. He changes d subject n wont talk to me. I can cry and beg for him to talk to me but he wont listen. I ask why he wont just talk to me and he says its not my life and he doesnt need to tell me anything. He says he loves me and he wants to marry me but how can I marry a man who wont talk to me. My friend is always willing to listen and give advice. Im starting to feel closer to him like when I have a bad I wana talk to him instead... Am I starting an emotional affair?
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AppleDucklings

You're not in a good relationship. It will only become more toxic as time goes on. You should get out now. Dump him and take care of you and your baby.

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"said woman, take it slow, it'll work itself out fine. All we need is just a little patience."-Gun N Roses

HerToo

I agree with apple. And yes, you are close to having an EA. End your relationship the right way before starting a new one.

madwoman

Marriage has it's ups and downs. When your spouse disapoints you, it makes it easier to get distracted with someone who does not have a stake in your relationship.

You are using the EA as crutch. Of course he's more attractive, you don't have the baggage with him yet.

Hook up with him and you will.

Take this as a warning that your not happy right now. but that in itself is not a reason to discard your man.

If you can get through the tough points your relationship will be stronger, your character will be stronger.

If you don't want to stay with him, then prepare to depart BEFORE IT TURNS PHYSICAL!

Evaluate carefully, make your choice, then act. Be mature and purposeful. Cheating starts with emotional detachment.