used one

are there any examples of NC letter txt or email?
Oh and she will need several

used one

is it possible for someone to be addicted to this behavior?

sigma1299

Just so you know my perspective before I answer I was the cheater - and yes. More than you could ever believe until you watch it first hand. It can literally be like a drug addiction I'm sorry to say. It can be so strong that it literally hurts physically to quit. There are examples of NC letters, someone will post one shortly for you.

Sorry you're here...

Eli-Zor

No Contact Letter
Posted via Mobile Device

used one

ty and i"m sorry for u and the ones you hurt also. Thats not said with any malice. We havent been married long at all. I gave her all my email passwords and she gave me many of hers. She has about ten email accts and only gave me a few. I found a bunch of txt from others on there from after we met and they continue. I talked with her about them and she tried to deny at first but then she started to realize all that i knew. She internalized it and spoke of not deserving me and hating herself and said I should walk away and forget about her....as an aside she and her sister were sexually abused by her uncle when they were 13. She has serious self esteem issues I feel.

sigma1299

I didn't read any malice into it - I, together with my AP, hurt a lot of people - ourselves included. Owning what I did was a huge part of reconciling with my wife and myself. IMO really taking ownership is a cornerstone of remorse and both are absolutely necessary if there is any chance of real reconciliation. FWIW - I have some pretty deep seated self esteem issues also and I believe they played a part in my susceptibility to an affair so you may be onto something there. Getting her to see, understand and acknowledge that would be a huge step in the right direction. Are either the two of you or her individually in any counseling? It may really help.

used one

been married less than 2 wks

CH

2 weeks only and you need more than 1 NC letter.

Annulment. Don't matter if she was previously abused, cheating is cheating. It's like the drunk driver who kills others, it's not their fault because their father/mother/uncle or 3rd cousin was a drunk and that made them pre-disposed to be an alcoholic.

She had a choice, low self esteem or not. If you want to try and R, annul the marriage and let her work her ass off trying to get you back.

the guy

Yes it is a addictive behavior.
If left un addressed it can become a life style.
Check out marriagebuilders.com..its another good site with alot of helpful stuff.

As far as NC letters go, thats a good start, but your chick has to want to change and do the things that will make her a healthier women. You cant control her, it is up to her, to own all of this and take the step to make the perrminate changes in her life that will make her the person she wants to be.

You have nothing to do with her emotional baggage, and until she takes the steps in unloading this baggage you are in for a long haul.

You can't change someone, they can only change them selves.

Just my $0.02

In my case, my wife would have needed 20 NC letters. The guy I caught her with was texted " I want to work on my marriage, I will not be contacting you any more. Please do not try to contact me I will not reply"

As far as all the other guys, she was the one that initiated the contact, so when she stopped calling them they stopped calling her. There were a couple of guys that tried contacting her months after d day but she never responded and they faded away.