Taking our own advice
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Navigation »Talk About Marriage »Focused Topics »Coping with Infidelity » Taking our own advice

Coping with Infidelity Relationship recovery from the destructiveness of infidelity.

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Old 11-19-2011, 11:37 AM   #1 (permalink)
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Default Taking our own advice

How many times have we dished out advice to others and yet we've failed to take it ourselves when it comes to our own situation?
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Old 11-19-2011, 11:41 AM   #2 (permalink)
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Default Re: Taking our own advice

YEP! ALL THE TIME! Although I am learning to do this...
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Old 11-19-2011, 11:42 AM   #3 (permalink)
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I am trying!
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Old 11-19-2011, 11:46 AM   #4 (permalink)
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Default Re: Taking our own advice

lol hmmm...
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Old 11-19-2011, 11:48 AM   #5 (permalink)
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Default Re: Taking our own advice

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Originally Posted by lisa3girls View Post
I am trying!
me 2
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Old 11-19-2011, 11:56 AM   #6 (permalink)
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Default Re: Taking our own advice

I honestly try to refrain from giving actual advice. I tend to try and stick to words of encouragement. If there is a thread that deals with something that I feel I actually can help with, then I will post. (usually where I read that someone's SO sounds a lot like I was/am) re my BPD.

There is a poster on here that she and I have eerily similar stories and we just BBM each other. Another poster sent her my way I assume in the hopes of me being able to help her. She and I vent to one another which is why I rarely even post on here.
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Old 11-19-2011, 12:02 PM   #7 (permalink)
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Default Re: Taking our own advice

Not possible.
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Old 11-19-2011, 12:56 PM   #8 (permalink)
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Default Re: Taking our own advice

Not me. This is her last chance and she knows it. I don't care, I WILL pull the trigger on D. I've been divorced before so I know I will survive. Financial devastation will result, so what. And she knows I'm dead serious. It's only money. I check the keyloggers every once in a while, so with the VARs. This is my second go around and I will not be played EVER again. I pick up her phone whenever I want to, she's an open book. Been waiting for her to screw up R, but so far she hasn't. Got give her credit for going all out in her effort. Because even now, I don't feel the same spark for her, maybe one day. If I had to, I will kick her to the curb today if I find anything out, and it wont matter how remorseful she is. Just faking it til I make it.

Now halftime is over and gotta get back to the game, we're at Michigan today!
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Old 11-19-2011, 02:15 PM   #9 (permalink)
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Originally Posted by brokendown View Post
You should get divorced. Monday morning.
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Old 11-19-2011, 02:27 PM   #10 (permalink)
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Default Re: Taking our own advice

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It's just funny to me.
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Old 11-19-2011, 02:51 PM   #11 (permalink)
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Default Re: Taking our own advice

It's easier said than done. I know what advice I'd give myself if I weren't me, the objectivity is there, but my emotions rule me, unfortunately. I'm either really optimistic or in denial about my situation. Can't we all just get along? lol
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Old 11-19-2011, 03:02 PM   #12 (permalink)
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Default Re: Taking our own advice

I actually think that I am pretty good with giving advice and doing what I would advise.
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Old 11-19-2011, 03:05 PM   #13 (permalink)
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Default Re: Taking our own advice

I spent yet another long, honest post to try to help Brokendown - spent 15 minutes typing only for her to pull the thread a second time so my message was for nothing.

Sorry - that was your last shot at meaningful, productive advice from me. You are now toxic to TAM. Just leave. You don't want to hear anything from any of us anyway, and now you're just attacking people.

LordMayhem is a legendary voice on this forum - so your comments sound that much more ridiculous directed at him. He has helped dozens of posters with incredible, thoughtful advice, myself included.
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Old 11-19-2011, 03:09 PM   #14 (permalink)
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Default Re: Taking our own advice

I give advice based on my own mistakes and things that I did that worked, what else can I do but share my experience?
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Old 11-19-2011, 03:27 PM   #15 (permalink)
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Default Re: Taking our own advice

But I think you caused it to end by threadjacking.

.....anyway, I do think that people sometimes forget their own advice. I know I have for sure. Then again, every single situation has nuances that make it unique, even if most of the advice seemingly applies.
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