Affair Sex = Unprotected Sex? - Talk About Marriage
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post #1 of 128 (permalink) Old 11-21-2011, 12:58 PM Thread Starter
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Affair Sex = Unprotected Sex?

One thing that I've noticed from reading all these stories about PAs in this forum and others, even from my ex wife's infidelity, is that a good majority of the time, affair sex means unprotected sex. It doesn't seem logical that if two people who are cheating, make all the effort to hide the affair and make their rendezvouz, but can't be bothered to use a condom? Is it the thrill of doing something taboo and sneaky? Next thing you know, someone's pregnant or an STD is passed on. What gives?
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post #2 of 128 (permalink) Old 11-21-2011, 01:02 PM
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Re: Affair Sex = Unprotected Sex?

it's the one thing I could never confirm or rule out as my wife claims it was always oral due to the fact he never brought a condom

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post #3 of 128 (permalink) Old 11-21-2011, 01:19 PM
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Re: Affair Sex = Unprotected Sex?

Mine admitted he didn't use one for most of it... grossed me OUT. And he has herpes... he gave it to me and the OW was fool enough to take the risk of a married man giving it to her.

He said he couldn't 'do it' with the condom.... ugh
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post #4 of 128 (permalink) Old 11-21-2011, 01:46 PM
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Re: Affair Sex = Unprotected Sex?

My ex didn't use condoms because he has had a vasectomy. No, I did not flat ask him if he used condoms but I'm sure he did not after I found out he had told the ow of that time, he "could try" to help her have the baby she wanted.

"said woman, take it slow, it'll work itself out fine. All we need is just a little patience."-Gun N Roses
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post #5 of 128 (permalink) Old 11-21-2011, 01:57 PM
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Re: Affair Sex = Unprotected Sex?

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Originally Posted by Almostrecovered View Post
my wife claims it was always oral due to the fact he never brought a condom
Whew! Good to hear since we all know you can't get an STD from oral sex.

Sorry AR!

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post #6 of 128 (permalink) Old 11-21-2011, 01:57 PM
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Re: Affair Sex = Unprotected Sex?

I think most people involved in an affair aren't thinking clearly to begin with and this is just another example. I know that people in an affair aren't thinking about their spouse so the idea of passing a STD along to their faithful spouse never crosses their mind.
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post #7 of 128 (permalink) Old 11-21-2011, 02:00 PM
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Re: Affair Sex = Unprotected Sex?

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Whew! Good to hear since we all know you can't get an STD from oral sex.

Sorry AR!
I was tested for that reason alone, but she said she was thinking more of getting pregnant than STD's

was basically our biggest fight post dday was about std's and getting tested

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post #8 of 128 (permalink) Old 11-21-2011, 02:17 PM
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Re: Affair Sex = Unprotected Sex?

Rubbers are a function of reality. In the fantasy world, such things to not exist.
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post #9 of 128 (permalink) Old 11-21-2011, 02:23 PM
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Re: Affair Sex = Unprotected Sex?

One poster on another board , repeatedly, brings up the fact that semen contains certain properties that cause women to get sort of high or addicted or feel good etc. If that is true, perhaps that is why they go after semen.
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post #10 of 128 (permalink) Old 11-21-2011, 02:26 PM
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Re: Affair Sex = Unprotected Sex?

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One poster on another board , repeatedly, brings up the fact that semen contains certain properties that cause women to get sort of high or addicted or feel good etc. If that is true, perhaps that is why they go after semen.

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Semen contains hormones including testosterone, estrogen, prolactin, luteinizing hormone and prostaglandins, and some of these are absorbed through the walls of the vagina and are known to elevate mood.

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post #11 of 128 (permalink) Old 11-21-2011, 05:07 PM
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Re: Affair Sex = Unprotected Sex?

Wife's foray into PA was unprotected. In her texts to OM leading up to it, she told him she was "safe" (from pregnancy) because of her tubal libation when our son was born (or, as she put it, she's been "fixed"). Considering OM had a history of sticking it in anything that would let him, I'm astounded she wasn't concerned about STD's.
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post #12 of 128 (permalink) Old 11-21-2011, 05:37 PM
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Re: Affair Sex = Unprotected Sex?

A_R Hypothetically would it matter if it indeed turns out that she had a PA? Sorry..
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post #13 of 128 (permalink) Old 11-21-2011, 05:42 PM
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Re: Affair Sex = Unprotected Sex?

She did have a pa
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post #14 of 128 (permalink) Old 11-21-2011, 06:18 PM
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Re: Affair Sex = Unprotected Sex?

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Rubbers are a function of reality. In the fantasy world, such things to not exist.


Cheaters are like drunks who choose to drive their cars risking not only their lives but the lives of innocent people as well. The difference is that drunks get hauled off to jail/prison while cheaters get off scott free.

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post #15 of 128 (permalink) Old 11-21-2011, 08:11 PM
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Re: Affair Sex = Unprotected Sex?

I agree with what is being said here. Like several others, my WW also had unprotected sex with her AP; in MC, she mentioned that they started with a condom but the both of them discarded it shortly afterwards (yeah, a real winner I picked). She said that he was safe because she knew him from high school and he's married but according to her, he's slept around on his wife long before the two of them started hooking up. Let's just say that I had to get myself tested twice. Let's also just say that I will never marry again...
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