crazyconfused

Question for all those who are farther down the road than I am..

Did you cheater try to come back? I ask for a couple of reasons. for myself, as i have put in my other post, if she does i want to be prepared and not put into the FOG again...and two, as several threads have been devoted to, cheating effects both the WS and BS and both seem to follow a script. Is this something i should be prepared for. I am interested in hearing your stories, your triumphs and failures. i think we are all here to heal and learn, and i hope that like me, listening to others will help others learn.

AppleDucklings

Mine did. He left me back in 2003 for a skuzzy. Then he came back in 2005, and I took him back. We stayed together until April 2011, when found out he had more skuzzies. He had 3 in the last 8 months of our marriage. So, I divorced him. It's been almost 6 months now since the divorce. He's not once been sorry for what he did. Although there is a part of me that wishes he would want to come back just so I can laugh in his face.

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"said woman, take it slow, it'll work itself out fine. All we need is just a little patience."-Gun N Roses

lordmayhem

Nope. My ex wife left and never looked back, not even once.

But it all depends on your situation. But you, as the BS, must ALWAYS be prepared for them not coming back. It's part of the 180.

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Welcome TAM CWI newbies- please read this
Betrayed Spouse Bill of Rights
The Betrayed Spouse Script
Just Let Them Go

sadcalifornian

My XWW left me and served me with D papers. 8 months later, she wanted to come back home. During our meeting at this nice Thai restaurant, I told her no and she started sobbing. Boy, it was embarassing with everyone around us wondering WTH was going on.

Lon

I doubt my x will look back, though I did anticipate for a little while she may, possibly even in the near future, however I have already chosen that R is not an option for me (I would always feel like less than #1). Today we made a few decisions about our child for the holidays and such, and after she texted something like "yay look at us be good coparents" and it just made me shake my head, so disappointed with her choices particularly leaving and cuasing us to have to "co-parent" in the first place - I would so rather both of us be in my child's life EVERY DAY, not just some 50/50 split. She sees it as a win-win somehow, what an idiot.

Almostrecovered

many try to come back

the real questions are-

do you really want them back?
and will the cheater do what's needed to atone and heal the marriage?

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Newbies please read this
My story

ArmyofJuan

Mine did, 3 times (3 months gone then 6 months false R, 6 weeks gone then 5 weeks false R, then 4 months gone and almost 3 years actual R). Move in with the OM twice. Each time she left she said it was over for good and couldn't see how it would ever work out between us. She wasn't very smart but they never are in these situations.

Of course how smart was I taking her back?