If the realtionship continues the cheater always gets the best deal..
So there is a wonderful post on SI/Wayward from a person 5 years out. She basically says her life is great, really not even a word about the pain she caused her husband. The affairs happened and they suck. Not much more, basically I was really a crazy person when I did all this.
I have been reading a lot of these blogs for a while now, not sure why. I think because for me as a person who hates injustice the injustice of it all really is an eye opener. It's kind of like a car crash type of thing. I have come to the conclusion the when you really look at it people who have affairs almost always get the best deal out of it. I mean REALLY get the best deal. This being said only if the couple stays together, but maybe even if the leave. I think most are not even capable of even understanding the hurt they have caused. It's sad but it is really true, if you don't have much of a conscience why not have an affair. Even society doesn't frown on you now a days. Your spouse will be upset but hell they will get over it, at least enough to stop hassling you about it. Really it is only painful for a while and only a long term personal problem if you have some shame, which if you are going to do this you really don't have much to begin with.
I guess I always knew this, I mean cheaters very often win in sports. But man is it evident. It's just so much worse when you use other peoples emotion to get your victories. One of the reasons I believe in God is because I think I would truly go insane if I had to live in a world and think it was without justice. My sister told me once that she believes Hell is having to relive the pain you caused others from there point of view. I hope she is right.
Anyway go read the post, especially if you are thinking of R, it gives you a good perspective of the kind of people who do this. I am sure in her mind this is a lovely post, there is obviously no shame (at least from mine). I wonder what her husband thinks of it. From her perspective it was the catalyst that lead to her happiness. All on his emotional back. There really are Vampires in this world, and too many of them.