But you aren't an impartial observer.
Your opinion seems to be that the only valid reaction to cheating is divorce and that no one should ever stay with a cheater.
And that is not an impartial view point.
Posted via Mobile Device
It may not be impartial, but IMHO it is a healthy POV, and I say that as someone 9 years out in a R that is probably much better than most.
Sure, there are situations where a R is justified and preferable to the alternative, but I have come to realize that those are truly the exceptions and should not be considered as the rule. Although by all measurable accounts, our R would be defined as a success, I am still haunted by things I can never "un-know", along with nagging doubts about things I still don't know.
Some people either have much better coping skills than me or they are just much more skilled at self-deception, which I believe best describes most self-proclaimed successful R's.
I also come to this issue with the experience of being cheated on and D'ing and being cheated on and R'ing and I can truthfully report that "I" recovered quicker and healthier by taking the D route. OMMV, but IMHO, not by much.