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post #451 of 646 (permalink) Old 04-17-2017, 07:15 PM
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Re: Wife still cheating. I just filed for D

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Pregnant?
Ha!

Wouldn't that be something?!?


Virginia: "Why can't you kids leave well enough alone? Everything was fine until you started digging around."

Burt: "You sound like a Scooby Doo villain."
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post #452 of 646 (permalink) Old 04-17-2017, 09:22 PM
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Re: Wife still cheating. I just filed for D

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My crazy ex easily gained over a 100 pounds after Mr. Perfect dumped her. It didn't take her much time to add the pounds on either. If she hasn't been dumped already the relationship is most likely in the tank.
My XW is now on POF..... for those of you who know me away from here.... you'll be getting a few

pics sent your way LOL!

A-Every single thing that has ever happened in your life is preparing you for a moment that is yet to come.
B-We know what we are, but know not what we may be
C-Never make the person in your present pay for the sins committed by people from your past
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post #453 of 646 (permalink) Old 04-17-2017, 10:27 PM Thread Starter
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Re: Wife still cheating. I just filed for D

I have talked to quite a few women on POF recently. It's a good confidence booster. But it is amazing how every divorced woman on there was cheated on by her husband. I have yet to meet one yet that admits to cheating herself. Something tells me they may be lying.

I have told WW at least twice over the past few months that I am done for good. But she probably believes that since I haven't said it in a couple months but have just been ignoring instead, that there is still hope.

And I doubt she is pregnant. OM has been fixed (it's a shame that I know that), and also the weight is distributed differently than it was when she was pregnant with both kids.

And her affair seems to have been a little different from the standard. She has dumped OM several times before the separation and fought a bunch. They fought like a married couple before Dday and after. So there is no telling what this crazy b$tch is going to do over the next year or the rest of oir lives for that matter.
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post #454 of 646 (permalink) Old 04-17-2017, 10:35 PM
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Re: Wife still cheating. I just filed for D

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I have talked to quite a few women on POF recently. It's a good confidence booster. But it is amazing how every divorced woman on there was cheated on by her husband. I have yet to meet one yet that admits to cheating herself. Something tells me they may be lying.

Re-writing history... heard same song n dance meself

I have told WW at least twice over the past few months that I am done for good. But she probably believes that since I haven't said it in a couple months but have just been ignoring instead, that there is still hope.

And I doubt she is pregnant. OM has been fixed (it's a shame that I know that), and also the weight is distributed differently than it was when she was pregnant with both kids.

And her affair seems to have been a little different from the standard. She has dumped OM several times before the separation and fought a bunch. They fought like a married couple before Dday and after. So there is no telling what this crazy b$tch is going to do over the next year or the rest of oir lives for that matter.
WWs hear what they want to hear. If it is not what they want to hear, they will re-write it.

So they fight a lot.... po poo-bear!

Until she snags a guy, she will convince herself you will always want her back.

She has lied to herself enough, she believes her own lies.

A-Every single thing that has ever happened in your life is preparing you for a moment that is yet to come.
B-We know what we are, but know not what we may be
C-Never make the person in your present pay for the sins committed by people from your past
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post #455 of 646 (permalink) Old 04-17-2017, 11:09 PM
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Re: Wife still cheating. I just filed for D

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WWs hear what they want to hear. If it is not what they want to hear, they will re-write it.

So they fight a lot.... po poo-bear!

Until she snags a guy, she will convince herself you will always want her back.

She has lied to herself enough, she believes her own lies.
The crazy ones always believe the ex's are obsessed with them and would never not want them back. They run a storyline in their head and anything you say is meaningless as they just warp it to fit the storyline.

Tomorrow is the most important thing in life. Comes into us at midnight very clean. It's perfect when it arrives and it puts itself in our hands. It hopes we've learned something from yesterday
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post #456 of 646 (permalink) Old 04-18-2017, 01:15 AM
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Re: Wife still cheating. I just filed for D

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The crazy ones always believe the ex's are obsessed with them and would never not want them back. They run a storyline in their head and anything you say is meaningless as they just warp it to fit the storyline.
You mean like a US Press Secretary????

A-Every single thing that has ever happened in your life is preparing you for a moment that is yet to come.
B-We know what we are, but know not what we may be
C-Never make the person in your present pay for the sins committed by people from your past
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post #457 of 646 (permalink) Old 04-19-2017, 01:06 PM
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Re: Wife still cheating. I just filed for D

When I finally divorced my ex-wife in 2012 after dealing with her crap for decades (10-year affair, denied for another 6 years, her joining a crazy cult, etc.) She apparently went all weepy and unable to do anything for weeks! According to our daughter, she was a basket case trying to say to her how much she loved me and that i was so wrong about her.

OMG. The rugsweeping and gaslighting ramped up for the end game.

I kept true to myself and moved on.

I bought a house 600 miles away from where we were and I've remarried. Most is good. However, I got an HPV-related cancer from her whoring ways infecting me.

She, of course, didn't have it progress to such a thing.

Her cheating is the gift that keeps on giving.

Regardless, I am so glad to be rid of her.

I hope you stay away from your soon to be ex-wife.

Last edited by michzz; 04-19-2017 at 01:51 PM.
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post #458 of 646 (permalink) Old 04-19-2017, 01:43 PM
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Re: Wife still cheating. I just filed for D

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When I finally divorced my ex-wife in 2012 after dealing with her crap for decades (10-year affair, denied for another 6 years, her joining a crazy cult, etc.) She apparently went all weepy and unable to do anything for weeks! According to our daughter, she was a basket case trying to say to her how much she loved me and that i was so wrong about her.

OMG. The rugsweeping and gaslighting ramped up for the end game.

I kept true to myself and moved on.

I bought a house 600 miles away from where we were and I've remarried. Most is good. However, I got an HPV-related cancer from her whoring ways infecting me.

She, of course, didn't have it progress to such a thing.

Her cheating is the gift that keeps on giving.

Regardless, I am so glad to be rid of her.

I hope you stay way from your soon to be ex-wife.
God bless you sir,
You are the epitome of strength after such abuse.
I hope your life is happy and you are good and well now.
You sure deserve peace and calmness.

'You never know how strong you are until being strong is your only choice.'
Bob Marley

“Worry does not empty tomorrow of its sorrow, it empties today of its strength.”
Corrie ten Boom,
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post #459 of 646 (permalink) Old 05-12-2017, 04:03 PM
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Re: Wife still cheating. I just filed for D

How's bout 'n update Collin?

A-Every single thing that has ever happened in your life is preparing you for a moment that is yet to come.
B-We know what we are, but know not what we may be
C-Never make the person in your present pay for the sins committed by people from your past
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post #460 of 646 (permalink) Old 05-12-2017, 05:19 PM
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Re: Wife still cheating. I just filed for D

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I have talked to quite a few women on POF recently. It's a good confidence booster. But it is amazing how every divorced woman on there was cheated on by her husband. I have yet to meet one yet that admits to cheating herself. Something tells me they may be lying.

I have told WW at least twice over the past few months that I am done for good. But she probably believes that since I haven't said it in a couple months but have just been ignoring instead, that there is still hope.

And I doubt she is pregnant. OM has been fixed (it's a shame that I know that), and also the weight is distributed differently than it was when she was pregnant with both kids.

And her affair seems to have been a little different from the standard. She has dumped OM several times before the separation and fought a bunch. They fought like a married couple before Dday and after. So there is no telling what this crazy b$tch is going to do over the next year or the rest of oir lives for that matter.
Of course those *****es do admit to it...they did no wrong...everything has been justified by their idiot best friends with statements like the following; "he was such an *******, and he's a piece of ****, you didn't deserve him treating you so badly! You gave, and gave and gave and never got **** in return...poor you, poor you...blah," and if not that exact phrase, ones disgustingly close to it. My husband and I got married in Jan 2011, I was 23, him 24. In March of 2011 he got his 4th DUI, and in CA that's a felony, with minimum 12 months of jail time, and that's NOT getting pulled over my police officer for suspicion of DUI, he DID NOT get into an accident. My husband was followed by this person who called and reported a drunk driver, despite her openly admitting she never saw him take a drink of anything at any time during her following him. Her statement said his driving patterns were not consistent, and his vehicle seemed like it was having a hard time keeping control, she said the 2 lane hwy they were traveling down had cement dividers in each side of the road due to the city widening that particular area, and the road was not as smooth as it had been in recent months. She followed him to an auto zone where he successfully, and with zero problems backed into a parking spot between 2 other vehicles, both were full size pickup trucks. My husbands truck was a 94 lifted f150, I couldn't even have made that parking spot as well as he did, even the arresting officer complemented on his park job. None of that matters,what matters is he still had alcohol in his system...you don't have to be at the legal limit of .08, you can be way below that....it's at the officers discretion and whether or not he feels you are capable of operating your vehicle to your destination safely...without being a threat to public safety....there's no way an officer would let anyone continue driving the vehicle if they pulled them over for dui suspicion, they wouldn't​ be doing their job...anyways, my husband was convicted in November 2012, they took him into custody right then, chose not to sentence him until January 2013, with 12 months in county jail, since they're more than triple their capacity, he got ˝ time, only have to serve 6 months in county. 4 months in to his, actually 7 month, sentence I cheated on my husband with a guy he had been friends with before I even met my husband, it was one time, not reacurring relationship, nothing of that sort, all that aside, break it to its rawest form, he "situation" lasted maybe a full 10 mins and that's due to me putting a stop to it midway, I immediately left, and went home...I was completely sober at the time....I had nothing to blame other than myself for my terrible judgement, as well as being incredibly selfish...i wasn't thinking of him, I was simply thinking of what I wanted, what I thought I needed. I was so angry with my husband for putting us in that situation, voluntarily, and not even a full 2 months after we got married. We don't have any kids, so i was alone just thinking all this negative **** all day, all night like a broken record playing a circus themed tune...just round and round, thinking "why? Why would he even take that chance after knowing what could happen to him, to us! Did he decide I'm not worth it? Did he decide he'd rather taking the Russian Roulette chance of loosing me? Does he really love me as much as he's led me to believe?" Before he went to jail I made multiple attempts to talk to him about how I felt we needed to make sure we were on the same level and that I didn't need anywhere near his full attention, but I didn't need a little, we knew he was going to go to jail, had time to prepare financially, as much as one can, had enough time to make sure him and I were seeing eye to eye. I told him i didn't want him to be sitting in jail regretting not spending time with me before going in, I didn't want him to have that on his mind while in there, because it'd make him go crazy as well as him writing letters and saying things he wouldn't normally say, over compensating for not taking it seriously before he went to jail, which in turn just annoy and irritate me and then things would snowball from there...my attempts on wanting to do the preventative maintenance on our just barely 2 year old marriage got shut down everytime I brought the subject up, so I just took it as his way of managing the insane levels of stress we were both under. I decided to stop pestering him about it it all. Tried to help him have his last few weeks out as stress-free as possible. As soon as he was in jail, everything that I said was going to happen, happened. We saved no $, none at all. The gas light was on in my car when I left the courthouse the day he was taking into custody. I had to borrow $ from his grandparent's to get home. As well as break it to his grandparent's that the took him into custody. I had never been depressed before that time. No family history of depression. I was so upset and felt abandoned, shoved aside for the couple of beers that were worth him taking a chance on being put in jail as well and him choosing to take a chance on loosing e while he was in jail. There's always that chance, even if you're in the perfect relationship, you go to jail, leave your woman alone, wit her thoughts and not once taking the initiative to stash some money aside to make sure Id be financially set while he was gone. One less thing for him to worry about, or that's how I looked at it. My husband got out may 30, 2013, be had a suspension something went on , never had any proof. He sits me down after being out of jail for roughly a week, and tells me that was my 1 chance to come clean about ANYTHING I felt i needed to admit to doing while he was gone. I lied and said there was nothing. Fast forward to January 2017, a week before our anniversary he tells me we need to have a serious talk either right then or within the next couple days. And that it was very important. I said "ok, anytime, just left me know when your comfortable having this talk" unaware of what he was about to say to me.....he said he wanted a divorce being he felt we were going to get one eventually, we needed to just get it done and out of the way ASAP to save us both time. And he was looking out for what was best for me , and he didn't want waste any of my time, like I'm some high powered CEO who literally has no time for anyone. All I have is time...I was doing the stay at home house wife thing, I was more involved with his 5 yr old daughter and got along better with HER mother than my husband did lol well fast forward to about late Feb-early March we had gotten into one of the many arguments we have had in the past couple months and he decides to tell me that he's giving me one last chance to come clean about anything that may or may not of happened when he was in jail. I decided to come clean, despite my original plans of never telling him something that I know is going to break his heart and completely rip up apart. He told me if i came clean he'd legitimately try to work it out and we could give our relationship a second shot. I took that opportunity to come clean like he requested, assuming he was going to keep up his end of the deal. Well, he tricked me. He had no intentions of working it out at that time, he just wanted to have personal justification as to why he was filing Divorce papers a week later. We still live together, we have 2 dogs that's are practically our children, 2 cats. We don't own our home, we have been Renting a house from his relative. He own our 3 vehicles. And have no debt at all. But i have no job, no vocational school training, so college degree, no money and no where else I can legitimately move to. I have never been close to my mother, who lives only 2 miles away. I refuse to become a burden to anyone in my family, and ask if I can move in with any of them without having a job, or money, as well the 2 cats I'd be bringing with me. He knows I have no where to go. We still sleep in the same ****ing bed! We just had amazing sex last night and the night before! AND yesterday was one of his days off, and he spent it with me, all day. He also spent the night prior with me...at our home!? I'm so confused because for the passed month or so he's been staying at different friends houses, then coming home to get clean clothes for work, and spending the least amount of time around me or the house as possible. I don't ask him where's he's been, or what he's doing or when he's coming home.. not a damn thing. I don't text or call him unless it was urgent, Even then I continue to quickly tell him the news and hang up. I've been noticing it's catching his attention and he wants to know what I am doing, and what is my attention focused on since it's not on him. Little does he know, I do his laundry, way more than he realizes, and clean up the yard outside. I guess my initial question is am I crazy for thinking he still loves me, and I feel like he truely wants to stay with me but feel like he has an image to uphold. Like I'm being made an example of? But not quite. I know he still loves me. We are too finely tuned to each other's wants, needs and thought process to not know exactly what the other is feeling and thinking.

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post #461 of 646 (permalink) Old 05-12-2017, 05:43 PM
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Re: Wife still cheating. I just filed for D

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When I finally divorced my ex-wife in 2012 after dealing with her crap for decades (10-year affair, denied for another 6 years, her joining a crazy cult, etc.) She apparently went all weepy and unable to do anything for weeks! According to our daughter, she was a basket case trying to say to her how much she loved me and that i was so wrong about her.

OMG. The rugsweeping and gaslighting ramped up for the end game.

I kept true to myself and moved on.

I bought a house 600 miles away from where we were and I've remarried. Most is good. However, I got an HPV-related cancer from her whoring ways infecting me.

She, of course, didn't have it progress to such a thing.

Her cheating is the gift that keeps on giving.

Regardless, I am so glad to be rid of her.

I hope you stay away from your soon to be ex-wife.
This sounds horrible...because it is lol I cheated on my husband one time when he went to jail for 7 months (CA dui)...it is the biggest mistake I know I will ever make in my entire life. I have never been disgusted with myself...ever, on top of being so ashamed of myself. I'm not one who gives 2 ****s about what other people think of me, let alone 1 ****, but I am still too terrified to tell my dad what I did. I have always been way closer to my dad than I am my mother. I'm my dad's mini me...and my mother used to constantly talk a bunch of **** about my dad the try to justify her bad mouthing her child's father in front of her child, hey again. My dad never bad mouthed my mom, ever. I don't know how he was able to control himself, but it is a trait I still admire most about him. Same goes for my stepmom. She is an amazing woman. She taught me how to be a great stepmom myself, she has taught me more motherly lesson that's my own mother. I am deathly afraid of what my dad will think of his youngest child, his little girl...who did the same thing to her husband that my dad's first wife did to him, different circumstances, but similar actions. At least I only did it one time, and it carried on for no more that 10 mins and that was after i stopped the situation, even though I started it completely sober....my dad's first wife was kind of sleeping around with a few different people and my dad came home and caught her and a guy in their marital bed...I mean going outside your marriage is bad enough, but ****ing jesus, there's just some lines you don't cross....like ****ing your piece of side ass in your marital bed WHEN your spouses is working locally and comes home every night, same time, or choosing to not wear a condom with your piece of side ass...that's worse than ****ing in your marital bed. In CA, your ex crazy could have seen him time, from what you have contacted from her...Physical Abuse, Spousal Abuse, Domestic Violence, and since it's a communicable disease, as well as a blood born pathogen (correct?) She would have been ****ed and no where near the way she likes. Hey man, I may be considered a ***** or a ****, but info have some morals...like 2 of them

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post #462 of 646 (permalink) Old 05-12-2017, 06:19 PM
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Re: Wife still cheating. I just filed for D

@ejamison22 paste that stuff into a new thread for yourself


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post #463 of 646 (permalink) Old 05-14-2017, 09:52 PM Thread Starter
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All this week WW has been texting wanting to get back together. She said she slept in my shirt one night, said she wants to watch me be a good father to the kids, and all this other stuff. I ignored every bit. The next day she got a little more desperate and said "I can't change what I did, but I am sorry for hurting you". She also said she told OM that she wants to be with me and told him she can't talk to him anymore.
I ignored all that too.

She kept texting all day everyday and I ignored it all except for the occasional question regarding the kids schedules. Today was mothers day and I brought the kids to drop them off at her house. She asked if I would move a pile of boxes in the yard for her because she saw a snake in them. I said no and left. She immediately texted and said I was a jerk for not helping her and also for not telling her happy mother's day. But I ignored her once again. I wanted to Tell her about everything she did to me that was way worse than what i did today.

She seemed to be happy and in a pretty good mood for having just "broke up" with OM and getting ignored by me.

As far as me though, I've been a little depressed the past few weeks. Not bad but maybe just a little like my meds aren't working as good anymore. And I haven't felt like dating anyone like I did the first few months after I filed for divorce. Not sure what has changed in me, but it's definitely not because I want her back. Maybe I just need to increase my exercise.

Last edited by collin8550; 05-14-2017 at 09:55 PM. Reason: fixed typo
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post #464 of 646 (permalink) Old 05-14-2017, 10:01 PM
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Re: Wife still cheating. I just filed for D

What's the status on the actual divorce?

Virginia: "Why can't you kids leave well enough alone? Everything was fine until you started digging around."

Burt: "You sound like a Scooby Doo villain."
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post #465 of 646 (permalink) Old 05-14-2017, 10:36 PM
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Re: Wife still cheating. I just filed for D

You handled that really well.

I would only add that if she continues texting you hour after hour, PLEASE go to the police and get a restraining order against her.
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