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post #61 of 383 (permalink) Old 12-02-2016, 12:51 PM
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Wife still cheating. I just filed for D

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Originally Posted by collin8550 View Post
From what I've learned in all my spying before I left, I don't think it's likely OM will dump her. She has dumped him 3 times already and he whined and got mad and stalked her. But she eventually returned. And he already divorced his wife to be with her after WW tried to dump him the first time. So he has nothing to lose. He can have her when he wants and be talking to other girls (or wives) while she dumps him for a couple weeks at a time.


Then move on and never look back. Protect your assets and the kids.

BTW it probably boosts her ego greatly that he divorced to be with her. When she finds out he is seeing other women her world will completely crash.

With that info, the others are right. You must divorce her or continue the divorce process (if you ever want to take her back). She will never respect anything less.

If he is a stalker IMO he has done this before with other women.

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post #62 of 383 (permalink) Old 12-02-2016, 01:06 PM
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Re: Wife still cheating. I just filed for D

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Originally Posted by collin8550 View Post
From what I've learned in all my spying before I left, I don't think it's likely OM will dump her. She has dumped him 3 times already and he whined and got mad and stalked her. But she eventually returned. And he already divorced his wife to be with her after WW tried to dump him the first time. So he has nothing to lose. He can have her when he wants and be talking to other girls (or wives) while she dumps him for a couple weeks at a time.
So, in other words, you are willfully ignoring the FACT she wants to treat you like he treated his ex-wife?

Yes, I see the hyperbole and implication he wore her down and manipulated her back into the relationships. Once, maybe, three times no. She broke up with him three times, chemical dependency my rear end, at this point she made her choice and it wasn't you. You filed for divorce and it wasn't you. You exposed and it still wasn't you. So, you work it out because she hasn't shook off her depedency, then you have a rough patch and runs back to him. What are you going to do then?
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post #63 of 383 (permalink) Old 12-02-2016, 01:23 PM Thread Starter
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Re: Wife still cheating. I just filed for D

He did cheat on his wife before with at least one other girl that I am aware of. I discussed that with WW right after D-day, but she had an excuse for him and said he wouldn't do that to her. I think her excuse was that his wife was so jealous and hard to get along with all the time that it drove him to it.

OM did stalk and whine and cry and threaten to kill himself the times she dumped him, but I don't know if that "wore her down" or she just missed the "high" and wanted it back.

I feel kind of sorry for her getting herself into this mess and I feel bad about how her life is going to turn out if she continues on this path. I can easily see her broke and trashy and just bouncing from one failed relationship to another for the rest of her life. And I feel bad for my kids that they won't have a mother they can be proud of. And I'm sure she will run across an abuser or child molester eventually.

But she did it to herself and it's not my responsibility anymore. I will try to keep the kids safe and away from any bad men she may eventually bring around, but that's about all I can do.
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post #64 of 383 (permalink) Old 12-02-2016, 01:33 PM
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Re: Wife still cheating. I just filed for D

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Originally Posted by blueinbr View Post
Then move on and never look back. Protect your assets and the kids.

BTW it probably boosts her ego greatly that he divorced to be with her. When she finds out he is seeing other women her world will completely crash.

With that info, the others are right. You must divorce her or continue the divorce process (if you ever want to take her back). She will never respect anything less.

If he is a stalker IMO he has done this before with other women.
This is so good, I quoted it for truth! QFT!!

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post #65 of 383 (permalink) Old 12-02-2016, 01:42 PM
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Re: Wife still cheating. I just filed for D

I've been gone from this board awhile, but I moonshotted back in to say this:

Divorce her and move on!

Unrepentant cheating wives are not even worth the hassle at all.

Meh!
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post #66 of 383 (permalink) Old 12-02-2016, 02:15 PM
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Re: Wife still cheating. I just filed for D

Quote:
Originally Posted by collin8550 View Post
From what I've learned in all my spying before I left, I don't think it's likely OM will dump her. She has dumped him 3 times already and he whined and got mad and stalked her. But she eventually returned. And he already divorced his wife to be with her after WW tried to dump him the first time. So he has nothing to lose. He can have her when he wants and be talking to other girls (or wives) while she dumps him for a couple weeks at a time.
Who cares?

Let them have each other.

Virginia: "Why can't you kids leave well enough alone? Everything was fine until you started digging around."

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post #67 of 383 (permalink) Old 12-03-2016, 04:33 AM
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Thing about people when they are cheaters, they are also liars. He's seeing other women? Sure. And your we doesn't really know why got divorced. Likely she did the D to him... So he took that freedom to bang any women.

It's foolish for a cheater to think another cheater is honest or trustworthy. Like when I was against my son to be near the POSOM while with his mom. She said "I trust him" I kinda laughed and angrily told her how the F should I trust either of them.

So yeah, your wife is deep in the fog. She has to break up with him and mean it. Give her that book I told you about... But continue the divorce.

Reason why that book is handy, is that it's written by a professional and talks about what the WS is feeling and how it's not real... Vs you. Who don't know how it feels.
Hell, I don't either. Just an idea.
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post #68 of 383 (permalink) Old 12-03-2016, 08:10 AM
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Re: Wife still cheating. I just filed for D

Seems like several pages are missing from the beginning of this thread...

Anyone else seeing that?

Virginia: "Why can't you kids leave well enough alone? Everything was fine until you started digging around."

Burt: "You sound like a Scooby Doo villain."
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post #69 of 383 (permalink) Old 12-03-2016, 08:23 AM
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Re: Wife still cheating. I just filed for D

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Seems like several pages are missing from the beginning of this thread...

Anyone else seeing that?
Yep, and can't get past page 434 in the meme thread in Social either.

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post #70 of 383 (permalink) Old 12-03-2016, 11:08 AM
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Re: Wife still cheating. I just filed for D

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Yep, and can't get past page 434 in the meme thread in Social either.
Usually a sign that someone has been not just banned, but also had their account removed and posts deleted. The Banned Members thread was useful for figuring out who it was.

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post #71 of 383 (permalink) Old 12-03-2016, 11:26 AM
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Re: Wife still cheating. I just filed for D

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Originally Posted by GusPolinski View Post
Seems like several pages are missing from the beginning of this thread...



Anyone else seeing that?


Yep. Viewing from Tapatalk and it shows first post is from @Affaircare and she is listed as OP.
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post #72 of 383 (permalink) Old 12-03-2016, 11:46 AM
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Re: Wife still cheating. I just filed for D

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Yep. Viewing from Tapatalk and it shows first post is from @Affaircare and she is listed as OP.
That's what I see also on a PC.
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post #73 of 383 (permalink) Old 12-03-2016, 11:54 AM
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Re: Wife still cheating. I just filed for D

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Usually a sign that someone has been not just banned, but also had their account removed and posts deleted. The Banned Members thread was useful for figuring out who it was.
I don't think so in this case. I'm having problems on multiple threads, including the same problem on the memes thread. I've also gotten database errors a few times trying to load. I think it's a site issue.

Kind of funny looking at this thread and it showed Affaircare as the thread starter. If Affaircare has a wife she needs a shave.

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Your marriage reminds me of a guy dragging a dead whale across the beach.
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post #74 of 383 (permalink) Old 12-03-2016, 12:01 PM
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Re: Wife still cheating. I just filed for D

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I don't think so in this case. I'm having problems on multiple threads, including the same problem on the memes thread. I've also gotten database errors a few times trying to load. I think it's a site issue.



Kind of funny looking at this thread and it showed Affaircare as the thread starter. If Affaircare has a wife she needs a shave.


Affaircare is a she.
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post #75 of 383 (permalink) Old 12-03-2016, 12:09 PM
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Re: Wife still cheating. I just filed for D

@Aftercare can you at least post the OP into the new post #1? The thread is kind of creepy... like some distopia where people disappear and nothing is left behind


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