Do Cheaters prefer Married or Single Partners? - Talk About Marriage
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post #1 of 54 (permalink) Old 01-13-2017, 12:16 AM Thread Starter
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Do Cheaters prefer Married or Single Partners?

This question came up at a lively discussion over the holidays with some military buddies. Seems (at least in our group) that most cheating spouses either preferred or just ended up with a married OM/OW. I just wonder is this the norm for non-military types as well, or does it make any difference?

There are some pros/cons either way (not forgetting that cheating in and of itself is a big Con) for the WS to consider. For our group it was considered a pro if married because the OM/OW was less likely to get clingy, fall in love, or want to stay over all the time.


The success of marriage comes not in finding the “right” person, but in the ability of both partners to adjust to the real person they inevitably realize they married - John Fischer

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post #2 of 54 (permalink) Old 01-13-2017, 12:23 AM
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Do Cheaters prefer Married or Single Partners?

Wow. What a fun party!

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post #3 of 54 (permalink) Old 01-13-2017, 01:55 AM
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Cool Re: Do Cheaters prefer Married or Single Partners?

I truly believe that the only prerequisite that cheaters primarily care for in a cheating partner is not necessarily whether they're single or married, but much rather the ease in which they get this newfound cheating partner of theirs to preeminently drop their drawers to the carpet!

I do believe that my RSXW is extremely qualified to answer that question and should be able to offer more than relevant testimony!

"To love another person is to see the face of God!" - Jean Valjean from Les Miserables

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post #4 of 54 (permalink) Old 01-13-2017, 02:04 AM
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Re: Do Cheaters prefer Married or Single Partners?

Who would have thought that being in the military would have a down side.Married of course,less going out for drinks or meals in case of being recognised.
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post #5 of 54 (permalink) Old 01-13-2017, 04:11 AM
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Re: Do Cheaters prefer Married or Single Partners?

There was a cheater who posted here called The Bishop.

He was 'honest' here and reported that he chose to hit on married women for a variety of clinical reasons.

Less likely to be looking for a permanent partner, probably STD free and unlikely to want to leave their spouse. And if she got pregnant he could blame the husband. He told his APs that he was fixed, but he wasn't.

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post #6 of 54 (permalink) Old 01-13-2017, 05:36 AM
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Re: Do Cheaters prefer Married or Single Partners?

I would have to assume that the more attractive choice would be a married affair partner.

The playing field is much more equal as both stand to lose their marriages, families and financial holdings. A single affair partner doesn't have all that on the line so they might be more demanding as far as wanting their married AP to leave, or wanting more time with them, etc.
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post #7 of 54 (permalink) Old 01-13-2017, 08:58 AM
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Re: Do Cheaters prefer Married or Single Partners?

I think it is environment and convenience so, I do not know. So, if they work or interact with singles it will be an unmarried partner or vice versa. I just don't believe it is as logical as some of the current responses. There wouldn't be the phenomena of affairing down or huge age gaps, if logic entered the equation.
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post #8 of 54 (permalink) Old 01-13-2017, 09:24 AM
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Re: Do Cheaters prefer Married or Single Partners?

It seems we give far too much credit to cheaters. However, it is common for people to convey onto others their thought process even when the others are not capable of it. To suggest that cheaters put so much thought into their partner selection suggests that they are capable of that much thought which is negated by how little thought goes into how their family, spouse and life will be forever catastrophically altered by their actions.
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post #9 of 54 (permalink) Old 01-13-2017, 09:58 AM
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Re: Do Cheaters prefer Married or Single Partners?

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Originally Posted by NoChoice View Post
It seems we give far too much credit to cheaters. However, it is common for people to convey onto others their thought process even when the others are not capable of it. To suggest that cheaters put so much thought into their partner selection suggests that they are capable of that much thought which is negated by how little thought goes into how their family, spouse and life will be forever catastrophically altered by their actions.
I agree with you 100%. I am a serial wayward, who also has other male friends that are also serial waywards. Its an ugly truth but the reality is male cheaters don't really care as long as they get what they want out of it. I never really agreed with the post from that player (Bishop?) that people keep repeating around here. Certainly not saying that guys that relentlessly pursue married women don't exist, but it isn't the norm. There is no point to that. Serial cheaters don't exactly have long checklist. Basically two things on it. Is she attractive, and is she interested? Marital status isn't something that is on that checklist. If she isn't interested they won't waste anymore time on her. Simple as that.
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post #10 of 54 (permalink) Old 01-13-2017, 10:00 AM
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Re: Do Cheaters prefer Married or Single Partners?

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There was a cheater who posted here called The Bishop.
Wow Matt, I remember that dirt bag. I call him this because I have wondered how many families he broke up. It really pissed me off just to view his threads.

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post #11 of 54 (permalink) Old 01-13-2017, 10:20 AM
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Re: Do Cheaters prefer Married or Single Partners?

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I agree with you 100%. I am a serial wayward, who also has other male friends that are also serial waywards. Its an ugly truth but the reality is male cheaters don't really care as long as they get what they want out of it. I never really agreed with the post from that player (Bishop?) that people keep repeating around here. Certainly not saying that guys that relentlessly pursue married women don't exist, but it isn't the norm. There is no point to that. Serial cheaters don't exactly have long checklist. Basically two things on it. Is she attractive, and is she interested? Marital status isn't something that is on that checklist. If she isn't interested they won't waste anymore time on her. Simple as that.
I applaud your honesty, sir. As I see it there are two main things that cheaters look for and they are penis and vagina. All else falls somewhere behind in importance with empathetic feelings for those they are betraying being close to, if not in, last place.

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post #12 of 54 (permalink) Old 01-13-2017, 12:37 PM
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Re: Do Cheaters prefer Married or Single Partners?

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Wow Matt, I remember that dirt bag. I call him this because I have wondered how many families he broke up. It really pissed me off just to view his threads.
At least he realised that he had a problem.

He was receiving psychiatric help I think.

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post #13 of 54 (permalink) Old 01-13-2017, 12:46 PM
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Re: Do Cheaters prefer Married or Single Partners?

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I never really agreed with the post from that player (Bishop?) that people keep repeating around here.
Pretty sure he was a fictional character.... Hardcore cheaters don't give a sh!t about marital status. They're sociopaths not psychopaths.

“When someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time.” - Maya Angelou
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post #14 of 54 (permalink) Old 01-13-2017, 01:23 PM
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Re: Do Cheaters prefer Married or Single Partners?

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Pretty sure he was a fictional character.... Hardcore cheaters don't give a sh!t about marital status. They're sociopaths not psychopaths.
That's the reason why I kind of doubted he was real, or if he was real that he was exaggerating. The post read like a betrayed husbands nightmare scenario. You had all of these "innocent" wives that probably would never had cheated had it not been for his "game". It was a frightening post because it played on the insecurity that a lot of people have, that their well meaning spouse can be seduced away by a player or bad boy. The fact that he had done it to multiple wives made it all the more disturbing. I guess I saw it as a post purely made for shock value. But...I didn't really believe it.
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post #15 of 54 (permalink) Old 01-13-2017, 01:32 PM
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Re: Do Cheaters prefer Married or Single Partners?

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Originally Posted by NoChoice View Post
It seems we give far too much credit to cheaters. However, it is common for people to convey onto others their thought process even when the others are not capable of it. To suggest that cheaters put so much thought into their partner selection suggests that they are capable of that much thought which is negated by how little thought goes into how their family, spouse and life will be forever catastrophically altered by their actions.
Maybe, maybe not. I think the subconscious does a lot of deciding for us.
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