Re: WW Posted on Another Site. Not Sure How to Proceed
I get the complicated feelings associated with a long term relationship. Saying it's complicated is a freaking understatement. Being cheated on sure doesn't make a person feel loved though. It's a blatant disregard actually. The casting aside of a partner that's put themselves out there by taking vows, forgoing others, intertwining finances, having children together, building a future, raising those children, leaning on and being leaned upon. It's willingly risking all of that plus not caring about your spouse's sexual health, personal health if the AP is a bunny boiler, your children's emotional well being, your finances or future plans, all while knowingly emotionally crushing your spouse. Giving them a burden to lug around forever - D or R. All for quickie car sex in parking lots and stupid conversations that amount to work gossip or meaningless platitudes. The risk/reward ratio just isn't there. It's betting it all for what seems to be something temporary and stupid.
The aftermath sucks. It's enduring years of crap afterwards - rages, emotional tirades, thousands of dollars in counselling, lost sleep, loss of security, tons of mental energy applied to "fix" this stupid choice. I am leaning towards D. The amount of people impacted by the dissolution of a long term marriage is shocking. Cheating is just absurdly stupid.