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post #181 of 613 (permalink) Old 03-03-2017, 11:26 PM
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Re: Not sure what to do - Positive HPV test

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Originally Posted by FortheRecord;She did say several times that [B
no one other than me and her doctor's have ever touched her genitals... her specific words.[/B] Later in the conversation, I mentioned the troubles we'd had all those years ago and I specifically said that if something had happened there, I would want to know and that I would forgive her...
At the end of the conversation she offered, and I agreed, that we would agree to trust each other and not discuss it further until the results came back.
It's interesting that she would use those words. Of course she could be telling the absolute truth and still have cheated.

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post #182 of 613 (permalink) Old 03-04-2017, 06:41 AM
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Re: Not sure what to do - Positive HPV test

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It's interesting that she would use those words. Of course she could be telling the absolute truth and still have cheated.

( Bill and Monica )
Yes because she may have touched his genitals, and/or given him oral sex and still be telling the truth as above.
If you haven't cheated, you say I have never cheated, not that 'no one else has touched my genitals' That's just weird.
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post #183 of 613 (permalink) Old 03-04-2017, 08:32 AM
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Re: Not sure what to do - Positive HPV test

Before the long knives come out with accusations of cheating, I think the first thing you must do OP is to wait and see what the results of the second test is before even beginning to consider the worst. HPV tests generate many false positives. You may be creating huge issues in your own mind and/or be allowing the choir of cheated spouses to create them for you. I would disengage from the group until the second test results come back and then decide how to move forward. Please do not allow others to taint what you describe as a currently happy marriage.

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post #184 of 613 (permalink) Old 03-04-2017, 09:10 AM
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Re: Not sure what to do - Positive HPV test

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post #185 of 613 (permalink) Old 03-04-2017, 04:41 PM
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Re: Not sure what to do - Positive HPV test

My friend you really need to ask yourself what do you want from your Marriage.
You just said that you would be OK with your wife cheating on you and your Family.

You never saw evidence about her STD. She told you she was infected,blamed you a little bit,yelled at you and now she refuses to talk about it or any other problem. She told you "leave it for a while".

Your good friend is her Doctor so pay him a visit. Ask him questions about your wife. You deserve to know.

Then what about your kids ? Maybe one of them is infected.

She is lying to you because you let her walk all over you.
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post #186 of 613 (permalink) Old 03-04-2017, 06:36 PM
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Re: Not sure what to do - Positive HPV test

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Originally Posted by Tatsuhiko View Post
You're suggesting that it doesn't really matter to you if she was unfaithful. But you've come to us, it seems, to resolve the question of whether she was unfaithful. So does the infidelity matter to you or not?

What is your goal? If you've already forgiven her and just want some honesty from her, that makes perfect sense. But if the potential act of infidelity is still eating away at you, you've got to address that. It's very hard to forgive someone without knowing what you're forgiving.
Exactly. Plus, look where his mind went at the thought of an STD. It went right to the unresolved locked door incident years ago.
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post #187 of 613 (permalink) Old 03-04-2017, 11:00 PM
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Re: Not sure what to do - Positive HPV test

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My friend you really need to ask yourself what do you want from your Marriage.
You just said that you would be OK with your wife cheating on you and your Family.

You never saw evidence about her STD. She told you she was infected,blamed you a little bit,yelled at you and now she refuses to talk about it or any other problem. She told you "leave it for a while".

Your good friend is her Doctor so pay him a visit. Ask him questions about your wife. You deserve to know.

Then what about your kids ? Maybe one of them is infected.

She is lying to you because you let her walk all over you.
Doctors aren't allowed to share a patients details with another person.
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post #188 of 613 (permalink) Old 03-04-2017, 11:31 PM
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Re: Not sure what to do - Positive HPV test

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Doctors aren't allowed to share a patients details with another person.
I think they would be if she gave permission. (I don't know how the law works in the US). However I wouldn't go there, at least not now.

The doctor is looking into some potentially serious health issues here, and I personally think that takes priority over investigating an old infidelity. It's crucial that she be able to discuss matters honestly with her doctor, not withholding information because she knows her husband will find out.
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post #189 of 613 (permalink) Old 03-05-2017, 12:59 AM
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Re: Not sure what to do - Positive HPV test

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Doctors aren't allowed to share a patients details with another person.
If the patient signs a HIPPA form allowing the Doctor to discuss their medical history with another person then the Doctor or his staff can answer any questions a third party has.

I know this because my Dad had cancer and the doctors would not discuss the specifics with me until Dad signed the HIPPA release naming me as a person he wished to have access to medical records.
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post #190 of 613 (permalink) Old 03-05-2017, 01:02 AM
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Re: Not sure what to do - Positive HPV test

I too thought her choice of "no one touched her genitals" was a weird choice of words.

That leaves open the possibility of oral and anal.

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post #191 of 613 (permalink) Old 03-05-2017, 01:56 AM
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Re: Not sure what to do - Positive HPV test

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Originally Posted by TDSC60 View Post
I too thought her choice of "no one touched her genitals" was a weird choice of words.

That leaves open the possibility of oral and anal.
She was being very cute when she said that. He took one meaning, she meant something else.

“The time's gone by for sentiment and all that foolery. Mercy's all very well but after all it's justice that clinches the bargain.”


“The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing.”

Last edited by Malaise; 03-05-2017 at 02:18 AM.
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post #192 of 613 (permalink) Old 03-05-2017, 10:20 AM
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Re: Not sure what to do - Positive HPV test

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Doctors aren't allowed to share a patients details with another person.
Sure they can under the proper circumstances and with approval. The doctor will ask who he is if she says no or asks him to leave he has his answer. At least that has been the way it was with every visit my wife attended and vice versa. Heck, as I did when my wife was texting her friend, I went back to see all of her medical records. Yes, it was very controlling and I did not care.
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post #193 of 613 (permalink) Old 03-05-2017, 10:25 AM
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Re: Not sure what to do - Positive HPV test

She contracted the STD behind the locked door.

1. Her careful wording about no one has touched her genitals
2. Her not accusing you of cheating (because she knew how she caught it)
3. Her being surprised that the door was locked? If you weren't home, why would the door need to be closed at all if the kids were in a different part of the house? This is at the very least extremely poor boundaries.

He was laughing at you not for your reaction, but because your wife was sucking his ****.

Sorry
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post #194 of 613 (permalink) Old 03-05-2017, 11:24 AM
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Re: Not sure what to do - Positive HPV test

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Originally Posted by phillybeffandswiss View Post
Sure they can under the proper circumstances and with approval. The doctor will ask who he is if she says no or asks him to leave he has his answer. At least that has been the way it was with every visit my wife attended and vice versa. Heck, as I did when my wife was texting her friend, I went back to see all of her medical records. Yes, it was very controlling and I did not care.
Where I live in the uk they wont even give test results if you are the spouse.Its all confidential.
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post #195 of 613 (permalink) Old 03-05-2017, 11:55 AM
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Re: Not sure what to do - Positive HPV test

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Originally Posted by Diana7 View Post
Where I live in the uk they wont even give test results if you are the spouse.Its all confidential.
GMC | Confidentiality: disclosures about serious communicable diseases: Guidance
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