For context, working_together is a repentant disloyal spouse trying to repair her marriage. Humble Married Man is an unrepentant cheater who does not intend to tell his wife.
Thanks for the info. Nice to meet you two, now if more of you folks would just meet up with each other from the get-go, it would save the rest of us a lot of trouble in the long run, don't you think?
elizabeth: "today everything looks the same but its like overnight everything has changed"
-are you fan of the classic 1978 (best) version of Invasion of the body snatchers?
"that not my wife, that not my wife"
Those pod people made a big impression on me when I was a kid. They look like they should but they're not what you think. Now I don't look much like Donald but wifey does look more than a bit like Brooke, so the metaphor does play at least half-well here at home.
I think it only says something from the time of the infidelity, generally. In the case of a lie from day 1, it would be the whole marriage.
Friend, if you have a crystal ball, you tell me please where you got it and do they take Diners Club. The point is that you can't know when it started. You can't know how many it was. All of a sudden there's a lot you can't know, and all that horsepucky about lie detectors and truth serum won't help you one bit, those things don't really work accurately and a conscienceless liar won't register on them anyway.
It's not just about playing hide-the-sausage with other folks, it's everything about her. You give her free run to look into every corner of you with a 6-cell maglight, while on her side of the fence, she gives you the 2-dollar tour that she's carefully prepared, and says that's the whole house. Then you find out there's been a secret staircase behind the kitchen the whole time, and God only knows what's down in that root cellar or if you even want to look after what she's pulled.
Matthew 19:9. In the bible it gives you permission to get a big D. Forgiveness can still be given even if you can't stay married.
I was basically ready to forgive the day after I found out. But she says that some the things I want to forgive her for, she didn't do. I mean, if you're going to get full absolution, you grab it and move on, wouldn't you think? Only banana dictators and Mafia dons usually get that, and she's turning it down. Go figure.