No I think people who experience shame can change. It takes something very powerful to change them though.
It's not just cheating, from what I see they are just not really good at being spouses. They are self-centered with poor boundaries, impulse control and the lot. They need a lot of work to change, if they even want to. Then you have to waste all this time with them learning to just be productive spouses, like years and years. While also dealing with all the fallout and living with your trigger. Is it really worth the effort? You don't think you could meet and fall in love with someone else? In your case you kid will still have it's father, that doesn't change.
Also personally I would never trust someone who said they cheated because of poor circumstances. One sure fact of life is circumstances change. Just because you are happily married today doesn't mean you won't be tomorrow. If you are not cheating because you are happy or your circumstances are great that is really not the right reasons.
I?d say that can be false. I?m an amazing wife short of what I did 4 years ago for 30 seconds. I cook dinner roughly 5 nights a week, almost every time what he would prefer to eat. He?s diabetic, I cater my menu to him and make sure he has things he?s supposed to eat. I do all of the grocery shopping, couponing, carrying in and putting away. I do all of the cleaning, all of the laundry, all of the running of the kids. I pay all of the bills, budget all of the money. I take care of the dogs, buy all of their food, take them to the vet, take them on walks and car rides, give them their baths. I pick up his medication and his insulin. If I?m out driving around running errands and he texts and says he wants something, I?ll stop and get it, even if it?s out of the way. Sometimes, I?ll drive it all the way home and go back out to finish my stuff just so he can have what he needs. If he plops his foot on my lap, he gets a foot rub. He gets back rubs several nights a week. He doesn?t leave the couch on weekends while I work from sun up to sun down on household chores. I work overtime at my primary job and have a second job to help pay the bills. If he mentions he wants something, he gets it. I shower him with affection, non stop. I hug him 2-3 times a day, kiss him more than that and sex is at his fingertips any time he wants it ? 5-7 times a week. If we go on a date, we do what HE wants, even for my birthday. We finally got to go on our first vacation last year. We went where he wanted to go. I give him random gifts just because. I tell him please and thank you for everything and I tell him I appreciate the things that he does. I?ve extended more forgiveness to this man than any one person ever should. I?m decent looking, I?m in good shape. I get along with his friends, he?s never told he ?can?t? do something like hang out with the guys. He does ?guy stuff 3-4 times a week, every week? I could go on, and on and on. Not everyone who cheats is a sh*tty spouse.