Basically I lied because I didn't want to hear her mouth about another woman getting me a discount on plane tickets for superbowl weekend. Fiance' always came off as the jealous (possible violent type) so I took a chance and lied. I was wrong. I admitted I was wrong and owned up to it.
Actually she doesn't know my friend. To be honest the only reason my friend got involved was that we were getting the tickets the friday before the Superbowl and everything was sky high. I sent a mass email out to a group of friends to see if they had any discounts or cheaper options and she responded.
Simple transaction- She gave me the rate, my cousin called her and gave her the card number, and she sent both of us the itinerary. I actually hadn't spoken to her since I started dating my fiance just to keep peace.
I owned up to it and showed her the emails
So, you knew, or at least suspected, that a female friend *would* be a problem, and lied. Ok, that should have been a big red flag on your relationship at THAT point... that she is so jealous that you even having someone you consider to be a friend of the opposite sex would cause friction. But that is one thing.
You owned up to what you did. When did you tell her the truth, though? The way it was initially presented, it seemed she thought one thing, then it came out that it was something else. You get that, right? How long after did you come clean about it?
Honestly, regardless of how it all played out, you two are definitely not ready to marry. I'm not saying you could never marry her, but she has a lot to deal with, as you stated that the ex has some kind of hold over her. You knew that for how lobg, though? That should have told you, too, that she really isn't ready to marry... at least, not you, anyway.
IF you choose to stay in this relationship, you definitely need to do a LOT of talking about boundaries. You should see a counselor to help with this, too. Again, this is IF you choose to stay together. If not, I think you both could still benefit from counseling on your own.
If you choose to split, so be it. Just learn from this, and don't lie to the next one. No matter how jealous you think she may get. Telling the truth will SHOW you her true colors... which is what you want!
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