Thanks, snerg, for your advice & encouragement. At the ripe old age of 42, I think it's too late to seriously change my physique
I'm quite a bit older than you and I lift almost daily
There's a guy at the guy I go to that is 74 and he still competes in power lifting tournaments across the country.
Age is only a mental block for change
You can change at any age. You have to make the effort.
Change starts when you take the first step.
and I just don't have the time, energy, or motivation.
These are excuses. Stop making them
Even going to a gym for 15 minutes and just starting is a great first step.
Getting yourself to the gym will not only help you physically, but it help you mentally.
If you're friendly, a gym is a neat place to just meet people and talk for as much or little as you want (getting that small human contact is great for mental health).
I am just very tired these days.
1) Get tested for depression. I would be very surprised if you aren't at least a bit depressed
2) Get Testosterone levels checked. You would be amazed how being tired all the time is linked to LowT.
I've asked a few times now and I still don't know what a "180" is.
Google the 180.
It's a process for you to detach from your spouse so you can start to heal. it is not a method to get the cheater back!
Regarding 9 and the "Just Let Them Go" essay, I've asked her if she wanted to go with the OM. She denies that and says she wants to stay with me.
You're misunderstanding Just Let Them GO.
Please reread it.
It's not about you asking her if she wants to be with the OM.
She has already decided that.
It's about you freeing yourself from the bonds of a cheating spouse.