Not many folks are going to jump at the chance to start seeing a legally married person. And who can blame them? Many of these 'married' spouses are still holding a torch for their stbx and just might choose to reconcile at the last minute before finalizing their divorce, it happens often you know. The single person takes a big risk having his/her heart broken.
I agree with this. I would also wonder about a someone who was comfortable dating a married person.
Judge says, "you cheated, you only get 20% of the assets"?
Sorry, but there is no legal way to split marital assets unevenly based on infidelity, unless a prenup is involved.
And even then that deals with assets accumulated BEFORE marriage, which a spouse isn't entitled to anyway.
the lawyers battle it out, but yes they consider infidelity when it comes to division of assets in those states, and some even have alienation of affection civil suits (but rarely pursued as it is hard to prove and win any sizable award from the jury and expensive to do)
the lawyers battle it out, but yes they consider infidelity when it comes to division of assets in those states, and some even have alienation of affection civil suits (but rarely pursued as it is hard to prove and win any sizable award from the jury and expensive to do)
Lawyers can battle it out to get their clients more than they are entitled to in any state.
All one lawyer would have to do is not agree and get a judge to rule on the splitting of assets, and infidelity will play absolutely no part in the division of said assets.
As to the bolded part, how? Again, attorneys battle it out all the time. But if there is a statute that defines the division of marital assets based on infidelity, please provide a citation.
Yes, alienation of affection laws do exist. But that is to punish the OM/OW, has nothing to do with marital assets. Not only that, its an outdated law that nobody takes seriously.
Having said that I WISH there was a state that had clear statutes on unevenly dividing marital assets in the even of infidelity. I think thats the way it should be.
The party seeking the no fault divorce does not need to prove that the other party violated his or her vows and any allegations of infidelity are irrelevant to the question of whether the couple may be legally divorced. However, the court may consider infidelity as it pertains to specific matters of the divorce settlement, such as:
· Child Custody: often the question of moral fitness to be a parent arises in divorce cases involving contested child custody. While discreet infidelity may not in and of itself influence child custody arrangements, a parent who is unfaithful and exposes his or her children to the infidelity or who neglects his or her children because of the infidelity may have a difficult time gaining custody of the children in a divorce proceeding absent the other parent’s consent.
· Division of Marital Property: in equitable distribution states there is an assumption that marital property will be divided equally at the time of divorce. However, if one spouse spent money on gifts, trips, and other expenses related to his or her infidelity then the Court may find that the just and equitable division of the marital property involves providing more of the marital assets to the spouse who did not spend the couple’s money being unfaithful with another person.
· Alimony: while each state allows couples to obtain a no fault divorce, some of the no fault states have statutes that allow adultery to be considered in determining the alimony. They reconcile this position by reasoning that infidelity is irrelevant to whether the couple can get divorced but may be relevant in determining the specific elements of the divorce settlement such as alimony.
Legally, in my jurisdiction (all of Canada), the ruling of adultery is simply held as one or both partners having consentual sexual intercourse with someone other than their spouse while not living separate and apart. So to me it seems regardless of any agreements or legal documents, its the actual living arrangements that defines whether sexual intercourse outside the marriage is to be considered adultery. And even if one partner did commit adultery there is practically no teeth to the law anyhow, so legal issue it is pretty much irrelavent, except it may serve to expedite the divorce decree.
Morally, each person has to make their own call. For me, when my W cheated and chose to not work on the marriage I realized it was over, and so the paperwork is really not important to me at all... when I got to the point of taking my ring off I considered myself a free man, meaning from that point on all my decisions were to be made with myself as the first priority and no longer my marriage. That didn't mean free reign to become an a-hole or be disrespectful to anyone... I knew I had to grieve for some time before inviting any new women into my heart, but to me being honest to myself, and thus any woman I would show an interest in, was morally the most important step to my relationship status.
Emotionally, I was cut deep, the crisis lasted a few months but I survived that stage. However I now have permanent scars that I believe will never go away, but like physical scars I am learning to wear my scars proudly. Emotional recovery from separation or divorce is unique to everyone, and I believe like a curve that gradually tapers to some limit.
With these in factors, as well as trying to overcome my own fears and anxieties, I decided to start dating and meeting new people and women, and realize that I am not as whole as I can be but doing the right thing for myself, even though my divorce, or even legal separation, hasn't even been before the courts yet (and personally it doesn't really bother me all that much, though I would prefer to have all that behind me by now - it just takes time)
However, if one spouse spent money on gifts, trips, and other expenses related to his or her infidelity then the Court may find that the just and equitable division of the marital property involves providing more of the marital assets to the spouse who did not spend the couple’s money being unfaithful with another person.
The above is most certainly true. But this isn't really dividing assets unevenly for the sake that one person is a cheater. Half of the money spent on an affair partner's belongs to the betrayed spouse. The cheater doesn't get to spend the BS's part of the money as they see fit.
If the WS didn't spend anything, of substance anyway, on the affair partner, infidelity doesn't have any other bearing on splitting of assets other than what the BS was already entitled to.
Re: When is it Ok to see other people? 
