Deciding whether to stay with wife that emotionally cheats. - Page 2 - Talk About Marriage
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post #16 of 35 (permalink) Old 03-19-2017, 10:55 AM Thread Starter
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re: Deciding whether to stay with wife that emotionally cheats.

Obviously I'd be a fool not to cut and run but it'll really jack up the kids lives. The one year old is mine luckily. Apparently she planned on leaving before she was pregnant and that changed everything. She's finally gotten a job. Hasn't had one in over two years. Said she was going to save and leave me but it would take time. Now wants to be together now more than ever. Probably because ol dude said no chance of relationship here.


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post #17 of 35 (permalink) Old 03-19-2017, 10:57 AM Thread Starter
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re: Deciding whether to stay with wife that emotionally cheats.

Just curious. She always has accused me constantly of cheating. Maybe to make herself feel better? Seems if I cheated, I'd let her do what she wants. Humans are weird


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post #18 of 35 (permalink) Old 03-19-2017, 11:03 AM
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re: Deciding whether to stay with wife that emotionally cheats.

File for D immediately, send a strong message first, you can figure out what you want to do later, you can always delay or cancel the D

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post #19 of 35 (permalink) Old 03-19-2017, 11:05 AM
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re: Deciding whether to stay with wife that emotionally cheats.

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Just curious. She always has accused me constantly of cheating. Maybe to make herself feel better? Seems if I cheated, I'd let her do what she wants. Humans are weird


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No she is gaslighting you, typical cheater tact. Nothing about being weird, just making selfish choices without considering others, nothing weird avout that

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post #20 of 35 (permalink) Old 03-19-2017, 11:07 AM
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re: Deciding whether to stay with wife that emotionally cheats.

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Obviously I'd be a fool not to cut and run but it'll really jack up the kids lives. The one year old is mine luckily. Apparently she planned on leaving before she was pregnant and that changed everything. She's finally gotten a job. Hasn't had one in over two years. Said she was going to save and leave me but it would take time. Now wants to be together now more than ever. Probably because ol dude said no chance of relationship here.


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The 1 year old is yours regardless of who is the biological father. It's not like you are going to stop loving him. You already bonded. Unless you did a DNA check you will never be sure though.

It will pain you if he is not your son biologically but ultimately for his future health and genetics this needs to be confirmed. Protect him from genetic illness for which he might be predisposed. It could save his life one day.

Nothing your wife says can be believed.
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post #21 of 35 (permalink) Old 03-19-2017, 04:45 PM
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re: Deciding whether to stay with wife that emotionally cheats.

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Just curious. She always has accused me constantly of cheating. Maybe to make herself feel better? Seems if I cheated, I'd let her do what she wants. Humans are weird


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It is called "transference". The cheating spouse thinks that the faithful spouse is cheating because that is what the cheating spouse is doing. She is transferring her behavior to you which allows her to feel less guilty even though it is not true. It is rather common.
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post #22 of 35 (permalink) Old 03-19-2017, 04:48 PM
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re: Deciding whether to stay with wife that emotionally cheats.

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Obviously I'd be a fool not to cut and run but it'll really jack up the kids lives. The one year old is mine luckily. Apparently she planned on leaving before she was pregnant and that changed everything. She's finally gotten a job. Hasn't had one in over two years. Said she was going to save and leave me but it would take time. Now wants to be together now more than ever. Probably because ol dude said no chance of relationship here.


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No she is still going to leave the first chance she gets. For now you are just the safe Plan B. Someone to provide for and support her until she can find a way out that benefits her.
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post #23 of 35 (permalink) Old 03-19-2017, 05:07 PM
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re: Deciding whether to stay with wife that emotionally cheats.

You two always fight.
You want open Marriage.
You hit her
She hit you
She is Cheating on you from the start of your Relationship
DNA your Kids.

Again you said you want open Marriage.

Please Divorce her. You are not for each other.

I feel sorry for your Kids.
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post #24 of 35 (permalink) Old 03-20-2017, 04:48 PM Thread Starter
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Re: Deciding whether to stay with wife that emotionally cheats.


Found out she was still messaging other dude. Packed her ****. She gone! Weird. I feel relief. I guess the sadness already happened or will happen later. Anyway. Time to plan a motorcycle trip to Ecuador. Thanks for he support bros!


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post #25 of 35 (permalink) Old 03-20-2017, 04:50 PM
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Re: Deciding whether to stay with wife that emotionally cheats.

Good for you!

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post #26 of 35 (permalink) Old 03-20-2017, 04:54 PM
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Re: Deciding whether to stay with wife that emotionally cheats.

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Found out she was still messaging other dude. Packed her ****. She gone! Weird. I feel relief. I guess the sadness already happened or will happen later. Anyway. Time to plan a motorcycle trip to Ecuador. Thanks for he support bros!


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OUCH! How did you find out OP?
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post #27 of 35 (permalink) Old 03-20-2017, 04:57 PM
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Re: Deciding whether to stay with wife that emotionally cheats.

Surprised the cops arrested you if there was nothing physical.

Never admit to wrongdoing because that's what gets you.
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post #28 of 35 (permalink) Old 03-20-2017, 05:45 PM
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Re: Deciding whether to stay with wife that emotionally cheats.

Don't believe in divorce?

How about strange men sticking their penises in their wives?

Choose
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post #29 of 35 (permalink) Old 03-20-2017, 07:47 PM
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Re: Deciding whether to stay with wife that emotionally cheats.

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By February I caught her talking to what she called the guy of her dreams from high school. Confronted her and she said it's been going on half our marriage and she would end it. They apparently met up once at his house, she admitted she hoped he would come in to her but he never did.
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Said that was her only friend when I wasn't being a good husband
OK so let me get this straight. She has been having at least an emotional affair (EA) with a guy "she called the guy of her dreams from high school" for at least half of your marriage, a guy "she admitted she hoped he would come in to her" when she was at his house, a guy she feels entitled to cheat on you with when when you have a normal relationship bump and she determines that you weren't "being a good husband", and this is how she really thinks? This is textbook cheater speak. The only thing about her that is different is that she openly tells you this because she has no idea that this is not how marriage works.
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post #30 of 35 (permalink) Old 03-21-2017, 07:11 AM Thread Starter
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Re: Deciding whether to stay with wife that emotionally cheats.

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Surprised the cops arrested you if there was nothing physical.



Never admit to wrongdoing because that's what gets you.


It was kinda physical. I grabbed her phone. She came after me. I pushed her down when she ripped my shirt off. They didn't arrest me for dv because they couldn't. A warrant for traffic 10 years ago.


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