Heartless Cheating Wife
Well I am new here, Just found this site last night and thank god i did. last night was the first time my WW spent the night at her boyfriends, unapologetically i might add.
Here it goes.
We have been married for 8 years, together for 20. I'm 47 she is 42. We were both married before and each have a grown child form our previous marriages. We also have 2 children together, 3 & 13.
Our life seemed good, nice house, nice cars, good kids, no $ problems, families got along well. We, like every married couple fought, but nothing serious. Sometimes not enough sex, sometimes plenty.
I own my own business and she is a stay at home mom. She has always been very concerned about her looks and 1.5 yrs ago convinced me to spring for a mommy makeover (boobs, stomach, etc.)
we flew to Miami to get it done by a well known PS, stayed in a nice hotel for 10 days recovery and everything was great.
Fast forward to Christmas 2017
One of my clients invited me and my WW to their Christmas party as they do every year. This time my wife saw a man she knew and went over to talk to him for an hour or so. It was at that time she took his number/card. He works from home so it had his home address on it. One night about a week later she said she had to go to the store, turns out she went to his house, next night the same thing.
Both times came home and had sex of some sort or other. even the week previous lots and lots of sex. too much sex to be normal and when she spoke to me had an undertone of anger. secretive cell phone and ipad, etc. I had a sick feeling that something was up so it's Friday morning and I'm in the office and i look up her cell records, shows text to a number for and hour or so after she gets home and before we have sex and also first thing in the morning. I punch the number into the browser and it comes up with a name and address near my office. I am sick to my stomach but as i sit there i am saying to myself no way, no way would she ever do something like that. I say to myself, what the hell it's nearby, i'll drive over and take a look. so I do, get there and her car is in the driveway, I call her cell, no answer. call again and she answers angry, i say "what r u doing" she says she is at home cleaning up the house, I say thats funny cause i am at this location and your car is here. She hangs up, i get out of my vehicle and walk into the house. She is sitting in a chair and her AP is standing there saying this is not what it looks like we are just talking. I freak, yell some and after a few min leave disgusted, heartbroken, intent on being done and divorced.
I spend the next 3 days in a state of uncontrollable sadness. So out of it, crying non stop that i cant stay there around the kids. So 2:30 in the morning I take off and drive around for a couple days, talking to my brothers in law who are very supportive and can't understand it.
I finally come to the conclusion that if she wants to work it out i will do my part to keep the family in tact. So the day after i get back we go to MC. She tells me that she was just talking and he was a good listener and she felt a connection to him and could see it going further but wanted to save our marriage. For 2 months we are in MC. the first few weeks she is saying she needs space and we have no sex. MC is going no where and she is more secretive than ever however sex is back. I know, i can feel it's still going on. Even though the sex is back she is very distant. I tell her i think she is seeing him, she denies and says i'm crazy. My therapist tells me that if i really want to know to hire a PI, then i would know if i was right or crazy, and if crazy we could work on it.
It took 3 days to catch her and AP together. I confront her in MC and she denies, i pull out the photos and she gets angry and then breaks down crying. not admitting anything though. MC asks what i want and i say divorce, she says the same.
It has been 2 weeks since that day in MC. I spend most of my days crying uncontrollably while she walks around the house like everything is roses. She will not speak about anything regarding the A or D.
3 days ago we talked about splitting up the assets, custody, mediation. She is very manipulative, i'm seeing that now, so i don't trust anything she says. I have hired a Lawyer and he prepared the divorce papers, I have been holding off thinking mediation is the way to go but last night with her spending the night at his house without showing a bit of compassion for how that makes me feel is astounding to me. She came home at 7:30 this morning and said good morning with a smile, I mouthed FU to her, and quietly told her it would be nice if she just moved out, she will not. She is cruel and self centered and thinks she is entitled to this A. I am getting more angry as i type. Tomorrow I am filing for divorce.
Sorry for the Ramble but i need to do it.
Any help in putting this BS behind me would be greatly appreciated.