How does the sand taste bremik? I told you so..... - Page 3 - Talk About Marriage
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post #31 of 535 (permalink) Old 04-02-2017, 08:11 PM
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Re: How does the sand taste bremik? I told you so.....

Have you confronted her with what you found on her phone?

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post #32 of 535 (permalink) Old 04-02-2017, 08:31 PM
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Re: How does the sand taste bremik? I told you so.....

2x4 warning!

I'd rather live in a tent then hang around so those two can just disrespect me further.

When is enough is enough? Stop making it easy for her. Grab your balls and pull the rip cord. Let her figure the rest out.

The person who is willing to walk away wins!

"In any moment of decision, the best thing you can do is the right thing, the next best thing is the wrong thing, and the worst thing you can do is nothing." T.R.


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Last edited by anchorwatch; 04-02-2017 at 09:18 PM.
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post #33 of 535 (permalink) Old 04-02-2017, 08:32 PM
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Re: How does the sand taste bremik? I told you so.....

@bremik, any action is action, no matter how small. Just keep in action and don't be stagnant. When you make consistent progress then the journey seems less bleak and the goal seems closer.

"If you deliberately plan on being less than you are capable of being, then I warn you that you'll be unhappy for the rest of your life."

~ Abraham Maslow
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post #34 of 535 (permalink) Old 04-02-2017, 09:15 PM Thread Starter
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Re: How does the sand taste bremik? I told you so.....

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OP,
Are your children of sufficient age to help with the farm? It would do them a world of good to see and experience hard work in their youth. It teaches many lessons and builds character. They are not learning any of the sort from your wife's behavior in fact, she is most probably a very large negative influence on them. It may be prudent, and about time, to leave her to her sex talking, partying, conflict avoiding MARRIED male friends. Your is the life of an adult, hers a child, the two do not mix well in man and wife relationships.

I do honestly believe that a person of your character, compassion and understanding can do much, much better.
Our children are 20 18 and 16. They do help on the farm. Thank you for your comment. The financial side is my number one hurdle
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post #35 of 535 (permalink) Old 04-02-2017, 09:17 PM Thread Starter
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Re: How does the sand taste bremik? I told you so.....

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2x4 warning!

I'd rather live in a tent then hang around so those two clowns can just disrespect me further.

When is enough is enough? Stop making it easy for her. Grab your balls and pull the rip cord. Let her figure the rest out.

The person who is willing to walk away wins!
That may be what I have to do is live in a tent
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post #36 of 535 (permalink) Old 04-02-2017, 09:19 PM Thread Starter
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Re: How does the sand taste bremik? I told you so.....

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Have you confronted her with what you found on her phone?
I didn't specifically say I found it on her phone but I did let her know that I knew she had been communicating with him and I wanted to know how he got her new number
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post #37 of 535 (permalink) Old 04-02-2017, 09:21 PM Thread Starter
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Re: How does the sand taste bremik? I told you so.....

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Lots of guys think that but that could just be your fear and emotions running your mind rather than logic and common sense.

Remember she only gets half of everything, and yeah you'll be paying through the nose in child and spousal support if the marriage was long term and you make a lot more than her and you've got young kids, but it's not forever.

Before you decide you will be financially ruined, do some research and like the other poster said, seek a few attorney consults, and determine if those fears are valid. Odds are you're looking at a worse than worst case scenario. I was in your position once. Thought my divorce would completely bury me financially but it was so bad that I just said "screw it I'm doing this let the chips fall where they may". It's all behind me now and I'm just fine.
My financial concerns are very real not a "woe is me" type deal. I wanted to separate originally but couldn't figure out how to do it financially
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post #38 of 535 (permalink) Old 04-02-2017, 09:21 PM
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What was her response. Let me guess. More lies or trickle truth?
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post #39 of 535 (permalink) Old 04-02-2017, 09:22 PM
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Re: How does the sand taste bremik? I told you so.....

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That may be what I have to do is live in a tent
At least you'll be able to live your life free of a Judas and her clown.

"In any moment of decision, the best thing you can do is the right thing, the next best thing is the wrong thing, and the worst thing you can do is nothing." T.R.


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post #40 of 535 (permalink) Old 04-02-2017, 09:26 PM Thread Starter
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Re: How does the sand taste bremik? I told you so.....

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Or just research the divorce laws in your area.

Most have formulas to calculate child and spousal support so you can get an idea of how much you'll be paying for how long.
It's not the alimony I am worried about it is the loss of income. I work off farm too, she works and we milk and cash is less than tight. Her job is the insurance provider and largest net income so big loss. She should actually live better living off her income only instead of the farm robbing money from it

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post #41 of 535 (permalink) Old 04-02-2017, 09:45 PM Thread Starter
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Re: How does the sand taste bremik? I told you so.....

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What was her response. Let me guess. More lies or trickle truth?
Both. She acted like she hadn't talked to him except for work and had no idea how he got her number. Then tried to tell me I was going in circles and she was working hard to be transparent. And why couldn't I just get past this stuff?
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post #42 of 535 (permalink) Old 04-02-2017, 10:10 PM
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Re: How does the sand taste bremik? I told you so.....

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Both. She acted like she hadn't talked to him except for work and had no idea how he got her number. Then tried to tell me I was going in circles and she was working hard to be transparent. And why couldn't I just get past this stuff?
Did you keep the evidence?
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post #43 of 535 (permalink) Old 04-02-2017, 10:46 PM
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Re: How does the sand taste bremik? I told you so.....

There is an Irish saying... "when mistrust comes in, love goes out".

Willing deception has few recourses and dictates attention... and many disappointments.

Her willingness to hide his contact isn't done in a silo, she knows the storm that will come doing this but has risked it anyways.

That is what troubles me the most as I looked back through your sharing.

You know what your values are... addressing them may take courage, but you will stand tall in these words once spoken.

Show her the power of honest conversation.

नमस्ते 🙏
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post #44 of 535 (permalink) Old 04-02-2017, 10:48 PM
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Re: How does the sand taste bremik? I told you so.....

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Our children are 20 18 and 16. They do help on the farm. Thank you for your comment. The financial side is my number one hurdle
Honestly, more 2x4's, my ire wouldn't be focused on the financial side. You wasted nearly a decade and you have no clue how many times she brought him home to you. Yes, I self edited my comment because it was going to be extremely vulgar. Still, you understand what I am saying.

Check your state laws on infidelity, alimony, child support and college support. Sit down with a lawyer and see what you can do. This is 2017 and don't give me the, "but she's a woman" claptrap I hear from many men. If a woman deserves alimony, in many cases I do agree, she should get support. Same goes for men. If she is the primary bread winner, don't play the chivalrous card for a woman who treated you with ZERO respect.
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post #45 of 535 (permalink) Old 04-03-2017, 12:06 AM
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Re: How does the sand taste bremik? I told you so.....

Bremik, I have been following your threads since day one. I felt I needed to pipe in with my tuppence:



This is NOT a marriage - not by any stretch of anyone's imagination. She continues to freewheel doing whatever she wants and then sweet talks you and turns on the sex to keep you on hook. She will lie, deceive - pretty much do anything she has to. And she probably knows that you are dependent on her financially.


Make no mistake that she has had and is probably still having sex with others especially the scumb@gs you have mentioned (Jay, Dave, Mike and God knows who else). And the killer is she doesn't care what it does to you (deep down you know she does this and deep down she knows you know). She knows you will do nothing about it.


So the question is how long you are willing to tolerate this despicable, disrespectful behaviour. And at what cost to you and your well being? SELL THE DAMN FARM, get a regular job and move into a smaller house and get on with your life. Cut this cancer completely out of your life. You love your "illusion" (your vision of what you think she is - not what she really is). If you had a good look at what she really is you would be terrified. Stop this now. Lawyer up and get the D underway. Lay down your demands one final time and proceed with the split. Then watch her R actions - not words and not her trying to have sex with you.


Wake up, dump the farm and get on with your life!

This is my quest, to follow that star
No matter how hopeless, no matter how far
To fight for the right, without question or pause
To be willing to march into Hell, for a Heavenly cause
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