Christianity calls for enormous strength from its followers and is not a faith for the selfish but a faith of giving based in part on strength. Sokillme, you are so right when you said “no one deserves that kind of sacrifice” However, Christianity has a form of love and sacrifice that is extremely rare and that form is called grace, an act that is not based on what you deserve. One of the most powerful verses on the Christian Bible is below:
8 For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this is not from yourselves, it is the gift of God— 9 not by works, so that no one can boast.
That kind of grace is what is encouraged in the Christian faith and goes against some of the human logic and some of the world system. Grace is a very great calling for the BS and also very hard to accept and you see that with people that have committed infidelity/betrayal (WS) and have a hard time accepting forgiveness of themselves and the forgiveness from the BS.
Sokillme, I am not telling you and others this so that you think that I am some great Christian. I am telling you this because it seems that Drifting-on is attempting to, or has given, his wife grace. If that is what Drifting-on is doing then I take my hat off to him as he has done something that I would not do.
In the Christian world some have defined mercy and grace like this:
Mercy is NOT giving a person what they fully deserve
Grace is GIVING a person what they do not deserve
I really don't like to have religious conversations on here for a few reason. Partly because I don't want to chase away people who need help and the point of the board is not about proselytizing. Also because I don't think I am the greatest example, especially when it comes to this subject. I am much more an old testament kind of guy when it comes to adultery. But I will for this post because I had actually come to some of the same thinking, so if you are not interested in a religious theosophical discussion bear with me. I actually had this exact thought the other day thinking about his story, he is a very good picture of Christ love for the sinner. I get it. I would not agree that this is necessary or required to stay married though like some Christians would, but that is a side note. And if it was required then it wouldn't be Grace anyway. But I digress.
Drifting on I am gonna be a little harsh in these next comments, not about you but about your situation, so forgive me and don't read it if you think it will offend you as I have nothing but respect for your sacrifice, but as I have told you before I have very mixed feelings about your situation. Yours is the most disturbing of all the stories on here, not just for what happened but also for how you had handled it. How much admiration I have for your strength and sacrifice but also how much it pains me to see you do it.
So anyway I see this story as a good picture of Christ too, however this insight was not the happy thought for me you might think and how it probably is for you. I led to a lot of dissonance for me. Being the type of Christian who always loves the idea of the freely given gift of salvation and understanding this story as the picture of grace, it's interesting to me that I find no joy or positive from this story at all, though I do respect his sacrifice. I can only see this story as a tragedy. If they go on to have 50 wonderful years together I would still think it is a tragedy, because he had to suffer such an indignity and she debased herself so. The imbalance of justice is too much for me. So this leads me to my another difficult thought. Is the story of salvation really a tragedy? Maybe it is. Now that is an whole other discussion for another board.
But even more disturbing for me was my next thought. So if he is like Christ then we are his wife in this analogy. Boy that's some cold water.
One thing this story has done for me though has given me a clear understanding of what sin and our separation from God must be like for God. It's is much more profound then eating an apple when you think of it this way. I am not a Creationist in the sense that I think the creation story in the old testament is God's allegorical way of telling finite man about himself and creation. (let there be light) sounds like the big bang to me, so forth. Anyway the apple thing never really got me emotionally, but thinking of it this way really hits home. God was like the working man who does everything for is wife, and 'man' was like the wife who goes out and screws (I really want to use the F word because it gets better at what it was but I won't as I might offend) screws her coworker because he was texting her how hot she is. Ouch.
Now to really get dark, just when you thought I couldn't get darker. Even now as I think of it this way, if I were Jesus, I would have been like nope, I'm out. Then just ascend after laying waste to the whole planet. That's not right. Gonna need to do some praying about that. Maybe it's cause man is the only date in town. Kidding. Anyway see what I mean about not being the best example. Still better then the women who posted on here today basically using Corinthians as a commandment from God to this abused wife that she must let her husband rape her. Talk about bad testimony.
Anyway pray for me.