Re: Really? Again!
Some people can face the reality of a dead relationship and just put everyone out of their misery. There are epic threads here and on other sites where the BS simply said 'no' and walked away into a new life. It was painful, but they come back to tell us that they did the right thing.
And then there are most of us, who can't cut the cord until our hearts are aligned with our heads. We think we can't do the hard thing, which is find the courage to end it. We are simply too fearful.
I get this. I have made plenty of decisions in my life that in retrospect I think were fueled by fear. What is true for me, though, is that living endlessly in the fear is harder than just making the decision and getting on with my life.
Otherwise, you are taking this to the bitter end when you are finally literally disgusted by him and happy to move on. At this point, your heart isn’t afraid anymore, but what have you done to your life? Life is not forever. By this time, you’ve eaten up years of potential happiness and contentment with the pain of living with a liar.
I think you can decide now to file and go or you can keep hemming and hawing. The end result is the same – you are no longer living with the husband who is unable to honor you
In-house separation? Waiting endlessly to get the famous ducks in a row? I certainly understand the issues of finances and logistics, but often these are excuses to continue to live in the fear.
What I most wish for you now is courage. As the famous Chumplady says, ‘Dump a cheater, gain a life.’ So very, very true. Why are you living in continuous pain because of him? Dump him decisively now.