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Coping with Infidelity Relationship recovery from the destructiveness of infidelity.

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Old 01-24-2012, 06:51 PM   #16 (permalink)
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Default Re: Will this help or make things worse?

He was fired from his job today. Bittersweet, I'm sure it's a blessing in disguise. If eel very relieved.
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Old 01-24-2012, 07:02 PM   #17 (permalink)
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Default Re: Will this help or make things worse?

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Originally Posted by stressedmomandwife View Post
He was fired from his job today. Bittersweet, I'm sure it's a blessing in disguise. If eel very relieved.
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There is a God! You need to keep an eye on him. Keep an eye on his cell phone use and go with him when he runs out on errands. If they're still in the affair, your chance of finding contact is much better right now.

He'll get another job.
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Old 01-24-2012, 07:20 PM   #18 (permalink)
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Default Re: Will this help or make things worse?

. Although I'm stressed because of our financial situation I am sooooo relieved he doesn't have to see her anymore. And of course checking our phone records daily is still a must. I don't think he will need to send her a letter, text, email or call. There is def. no need for him to break anything off anymore. Or should he?
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Old 01-24-2012, 08:47 PM   #19 (permalink)
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Default Re: Will this help or make things worse?

Yes he should, an NC letter is a most and under the current sitch, it may have been her fault that he lost his job. But thats besides the point, he needs to make it clear to you and to her and to him self that he has choosen to work and his marriage. This should be writen by him and reviewed by you and send together as a married couple.
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Old 01-24-2012, 09:14 PM   #20 (permalink)
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Default Re: Will this help or make things worse?

Did his association with this woman have anything to do with him being fired?
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Old 01-25-2012, 01:43 AM   #21 (permalink)
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Default Re: Will this help or make things worse?

I think he should do the NC letter. It is a statement to the OW that there is no returning or renewing their A. It makes it pretty clear from what I understand and everyone on her makes it pretty clear that it is a step that should be taken.

I wish we had taken that step. I am always worried that they will run into eachother and that because there was not a full on cut off in writing that she may call him or something and then it will be the end to our marriage. (I live in fear of it)

Although I am sure there are many reason the NC is important not just my take on it but I think that taking the right steps will make all the difference.
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Old 01-25-2012, 06:56 AM   #22 (permalink)
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Default Re: Will this help or make things worse?

Still needs to send it. It's kind of like drawing a line in the sand. Once it's out there it can't be taken back, could he recontact her anyway? Sure. But, then you have it as a stick and a promise with which to beat him for breaking NC. Conversely it becomes a physical written commitment for him to not recontact her. These are all additional reasons I said to not do it face to face. It needs to be a letter and he still needs to send it.
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