Originally Posted by the guy
I think it says alot, it was a big risk she took in owning up. I suggest you keep an eye on her and if her action and change in life style dictated that she is willing to learn healthier behaviors and understanding what she did and how to prevent it then there is a faith that one can have that infidelity can be overcome.
Trust through validation is the path you can take to work this out, but some may argue that becoming a mamber of the cheater police is not worth it.
It sound like you now know exactly what you are going to forgive her for with her confession so thats a start. The big trick is forgiving her and that she gets the help that will prevent her from doing this unhealthy behavior again.
they guy, I've read your other threads and OMG i think i screwed-up all this time. I TOO HAVE TREATED MY WIFE ONLY AS A BOOTY CALL AND SHE MAY HAVE ACTED ACCORDINGLY.
She was very submissive on the first year of our marriage. She easily gets jealous when other women talk to me or I do the same. I didn't listen to her when she talks. God, i think i pushed her to do those things. She easily gives in to my requests (even when we were just courting) and asks me after if this is only (sex) what I want from her to which I reply no when I was partly lying. And I get cold to her when she doesn't.
Up to now, after I learned what she did and want to separate, I still fvck her without fail. Was that all I wanted from her? She may have felt that way all this years. I really have disrespected her by doing that. I never treated her as a person, as a wife. I only get nice when I want action. I go to work, fvck her in the evening without asking how's her day, then sleep.
I've never seen the situation from this angle. All I've seen is what she did and never what I did.
The guy, it's been almost a month since DDay and your threads had somehow shown me things I NEVER saw before. I'm still seeing new things about our relationship as days go by and that's good.
But I don't know what I'd do now.