I'm running away like he did, am i doing the right thing tho?
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Navigation »Talk About Marriage »Focused Topics »Coping with Infidelity » I'm running away like he did, am i doing the right thing tho?

Coping with Infidelity Relationship recovery from the destructiveness of infidelity.

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Old 02-18-2012, 02:31 PM   #1 (permalink)
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Default I'm running away like he did, am i doing the right thing tho?

H and i have been seperated and living apart for 2 months now.

He told me he had a ONS while away, then said it was not true he had said it to hurt me a while after, its a long story and a huge mess, i have posted most of the sorry story on another thread.

I love my H deeply and miss him every second, but he can't take responsibility, he blames issues he has with anger on me, he wont accept he needs help, he needs to change in order for a R to work.

I am estranged from most of my family and the ones that are around dont treat me well, i am ignored by the people i live with, which wasnt a problem before i lost my H and my contract at work was axed (work finishes @ the end of this month) due to company cuts.

Everything has gotten to me a bit since christmas and i have been diagnosed with anxiety disorder and severe depression, the doctor has signed me off work.

So I've been existing mostly in my bed going round and round in circles with H, and today i snapped i went online and booked myself 3 weeks in The Algarve alone.

Now im freaking out a bit, i have travelled alone in the past but never stayed away alone, i plan to just vanish without a word to anyone especially H.

Am i crazy for doing this?
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Old 02-18-2012, 03:19 PM   #2 (permalink)
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Default Re: I'm running away like he did, am i doing the right thing tho?

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So I've been existing mostly in my bed going round and round in circles with H, and today i snapped i went online and booked myself 3 weeks in The Algarve alone.

Now im freaking out a bit, i have travelled alone in the past but never stayed away alone, i plan to just vanish without a word to anyone especially H.

Am i crazy for doing this?
Actually, I`m a bit envious.

The thought of just disappearing without a trace for 3 weeks sounds very empowering for some reason.

Don`t know if it`s right for you or not in your situation.
Only you can know.
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Old 02-18-2012, 03:31 PM   #3 (permalink)
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Default Re: I'm running away like he did, am i doing the right thing tho?

To be honest it has made me feel empowered, i guess i am seeking some sort of reassurance its strange for me not to have my husband to bounce ideas off and to approve/disapprove.

He will defintley disapprove of this but only for selfish reasons, i cant help thinking i would rather be miserable and alone in the sun on the beach with a spa than miserable and alone in sub zero temps and hassle from every direction!
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Old 02-18-2012, 03:34 PM   #4 (permalink)
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Default Re: I'm running away like he did, am i doing the right thing tho?

Ya me too. Sounds like a great time to work on yrself with no outside influences

Good Luck
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Old 02-18-2012, 03:39 PM   #5 (permalink)
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Default Re: I'm running away like he did, am i doing the right thing tho?

thanks guys, im feeling better about my decision already.

Bit nervous! better load up my kindle i fly out friday eeeeeek
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Old 02-18-2012, 03:44 PM   #6 (permalink)
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Default Re: I'm running away like he did, am i doing the right thing tho?

I've been following your story and I think its a great idea.
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Old 02-18-2012, 03:51 PM   #7 (permalink)
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Default Re: I'm running away like he did, am i doing the right thing tho?

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.... i cant help thinking i would rather be miserable and alone in the sun on the beach with a spa than miserable and alone in sub zero temps and hassle from every direction!
I`ve got to say when you put it that way it doesn`t sound like a bad thing for any situation.

Think about for a few days, you can always cancel but if there is no one else who would worry for three weeks don`t let your husband stand in the way.
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Old 02-18-2012, 04:14 PM   #8 (permalink)
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Default Re: I'm running away like he did, am i doing the right thing tho?

I think it sounds wonderful, and being away with no distractions will give you the time for yourself that you probably need....DO IT FOR THOSE OF US THAT CAN'T!!!!!! lol
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Old 02-18-2012, 04:24 PM   #9 (permalink)
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Default Re: I'm running away like he did, am i doing the right thing tho?

I will be blowing off a few days i supposed to be in work before my contract ends but i couldnt care less will just go sick, thats the most irresponsible thing about it i can think of.

SS you are a sweetheart, i am certainly going, god bless this forum i was freaking out a bit before i posted, but now im booking yoga classes and a good few hours horse riding time, i love riding and have always dreamed of riding on a beach - i will be riding in the surf this time next week :-)

H will go mad i will get accused of all sorts, the more the better i say, maybe then he might be halfway there to knowing how he has made me feel, and i will come back looking and hopefully feeling great - have lost so much weight so quickly since split its toning time!
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