sirdano

Sound like he needs a job change.

AE86freak

He made a horrible choice by not trying to get into a carrer that would have him home with his family at the end of the day. All men are in danger of cheating on their wives so the best thing to do is avoid odvious situtations that will make cheating more likely to happen.

ninnie

Thank you for posting the link, Chapparal. We both read it and it helped a lot. Its good to know that what I am going thru is pretty well par for the course. My husband understands what I am feeling and how to help me thru it. He now realizes that he can not justify what he did by trying to blame me or saying he was lonely. He messed up and has to take ownership of that. You helped us and its good to see it came from a fellow "hick" from Ky !!

chapparal

You are more than welcome, Go Cats

ing

In this case I am glad you shared this site with your husband, please learn from the painful experiences that have been shared. Good people can make bad decisions and if YOU are willing to forgive, in time you can have a stronger marriage. It will take time though and much love and care from your husband.
I would continue MC to work through this. It is very hard to do as a couple without some professional help.
Again, good luck to both of you and when you hit a bump in the road [which you will] feel free to come back and vent

ninnie

things really had been going well. he were able to talk it out quite a bit but today we changed counselors and just going thru it all to catch her up was so painful. he finally told me 2 days ago that he had bought condoms and was basically looking to get laid. he still says that never happened but just because the opportunity was not there. couple of the girls were with friends and he went to one girls house but it was a pig sty and he would not have sex there. everytime
i think its getting better, it gets worse. at the end of my rope. I keep saying
I want to work it out but get angry that I have to do all this work when
was the wife I was supposed to be,
.

Lone Star

I'm sorry you are here. One thing that stuck out for me was he is a recovering alcoholic, but yet he was in bars? Is that correct?

ninnie

yes. he says he wasn't drinking. I actually believe that more than when he says no sex happened. He always has been able to go to bars with no problems with drinking. wish he had been drinking. maybe I could accept the whole thing better if he had been drunk, but this was deliberate and well planned.