i'm new here and got some good advice.just wondering how you other post found out your spouse was cheating ?
Well I kinda knew and had asked the right questions but got smokescreened. Brain damaged after hypoxia and in this state of mind opened his seldom-used Outlook account on the old computer of his I'd started using after mine broke, thinking it was my Outlook account, and looking for his mom's email address since he asked me to email her specifically as he was deployed.
Found an email he'd sent her the same day he'd typed a 'fake' one as a 'demo' and had emailed it to her to show me how he corresponded with her. I figured out that if she'd received the fake email and the real email the same day, that he would have either told her about the deceit and the reason for the extra 'fake/demo' email or that she would already have known why this happened or he could just talk to her about it in person to explain it.
Of course, he denied everything. So did she.
Funny she was still denying it until I sent her H another email she'd sent my stbxh back in 2002, well before I was even back in the picture (he was single, she was married). I can easily see that I was a superfluous wife, selected to provide sexual and domestic benefits as well as lining his pockets and building home equity for him while he deployed (soldiers only gets housing benefits while deployed if married). Can we say, FRAUD? Of all kinds.
By the time I left, I think he was realizing that he could have had it all, even better than what was on his own game plan. But, too late! I don't stay in marriages where people lie to me in order to use me for their own purposes. I prefer invitations to be part of someone's life, on the up and up.