In the short term, expressing anger is actually healthy but in the long run it can be toxic and will poison the person's life and those closest to him.
Lighten up Francis. You know you're just venting and you know it.
Many times a newly betrayed comes on here and they are in their own fog of denial & disbelief, they often need that verbal 2x4 like a splsh of cold water on the face to shake them out of it. You're supposed to get mad t the situation you're in.
What you did was spoil your wife, and I suspect that she's a spoiled princess who either does not work or works very little. Noe you realize that you were not being a good husband by catering to her every whim. Horseback riding and playing WoW all the time? While you are busting your ass earning a living and she
disrespects you and the marriage. You're supposed to c0ckblock another man from your wife. It's called protecting your marriage. Too many men are like you, so terrified of being seen as being controlling that they end up going to the other extreme and become doormats.
Whether you want to R or not, use this as a learning experience. Posted via Mobile Device
I want to thank you all for your abrasiveness and poking fun at my situation.
That being said, I have poured over what you said and taken it to heart. Last night when I got home, I grabbed her phone while she was talking to her WOW buddy and told him to come pick her cheating ass up. then I grabbed her keys took the key off and shoved her and her crutches out the door. (she got injured while horseback riding.) She is now sleeping at her mother's apt. and capt. wonderful still hasn't come to rescue her.
Dude. Folks were trying to just wake you up. It is not about losing your temper to the point of uncontrolle rage. It is not about physically hurting your wife. It is about calmly and firmly asserting your self. Asserting your boundaries.
Now if you have tossed the WOW guy out physically I would say good on ya.
Frankly you did pretty good. I think that telling him to pick her cheating @ss was not all that bad as far as she had taken this.
It is hard to tell from your post how much force you used. Maybe you just hastened her out the door.
Horseback? WoW? She has too much time on her hands.
Time to get your life back on track. Calm down. Actually I have pruposely in my life left my self somewhat exposed to certain people. My wife for one. Just to see if if they would take advantage. I do that at work as well. Burn me once, shame on you. Burn me twice shame on me. It is ok to be a caring and loving person. It is ok to go the extra mile sometimes for those you care about. If they are worth anything they will respect you.
If they do not respect you ... cut them out of your life. The people we invite into our hearts we have to trust. Trust is earned.
Dude. Folks were trying to just wake you up. It is not about losing your temper to the point of uncontrolle rage. It is not about physically hurting your wife. It is about calmly and firmly asserting your self. Asserting your boundaries.
Now if you have tossed the WOW guy out physically I would say good on ya.
Frankly you did pretty good. I think that telling him to pick her cheating @ss was not all that bad as far as she had taken this.
It is hard to tell from your post how much force you used. Maybe you just hastened her out the door.
Horseback? WoW? She has too much time on her hands.
Time to get your life back on track. Calm down. Actually I have pruposely in my life left my self somewhat exposed to certain people. My wife for one. Just to see if if they would take advantage. I do that at work as well. Burn me once, shame on you. Burn me twice shame on me. It is ok to be a caring and loving person. It is ok to go the extra mile sometimes for those you care about. If they are worth anything they will respect you.
If they do not respect you ... cut them out of your life. The people we invite into our hearts we have to trust. Trust is earned.
no I just made her walk outside and locked her out. As for the Wow and horseback riding, she hasn't played wow for quite some time, and I took her horseback riding for valentines.
We used to play wow together with people from my work. I brought the ass hat into our lives and this is how my faith and trust are repaid. **** both of them. She was let go from her job yesterday because she missed 24 days of work this year.
Now I'm going to strike hard and fast. I shut off her phone and I'm going to throw her clothes outside in the a pile. Posted via Mobile Device
Lighten up Francis. You know you're just venting and you know it.
Many times a newly betrayed comes on here and they are in their own fog of denial & disbelief, they often need that verbal 2x4 like a splsh of cold water on the face to shake them out of it. You're supposed to get mad t the situation you're in.
What you did was spoil your wife, and I suspect that she's a spoiled princess who either does not work or works very little. Noe you realize that you were not being a good husband by catering to her every whim. Horseback riding and playing WoW all the time? While you are busting your ass earning a living and she
disrespects you and the marriage. You're supposed to c0ckblock another man from your wife. It's called protecting your marriage. Too many men are like you, so terrified of being seen as being controlling that they end up going to the other extreme and become doormats.
Whether you want to R or not, use this as a learning experience. Posted via Mobile Device
That frigging WOW is a curse, I wished to H@ll I'd never let in our house, my wife hooked up with OM from WOW as well. It makes me laugh to look at the guy, unbelievable...
no I just made her walk outside and locked her out. As for the Wow and horseback riding, she hasn't played wow for quite some time, and I took her horseback riding for valentines.
We used to play wow together with people from my work. I brought the ass hat into our lives and this is how my faith and trust are repaid. **** both of them. She was let go from her job yesterday because she missed 24 days of work this year.
Now I'm going to strike hard and fast. I shut off her phone and I'm going to throw her clothes outside in the a pile. Posted via Mobile Device
Ok, glad you did not physically rough her up. When emotions are high there can be unintended consequences. Now again if the OM was there then you would have every right to give him a beaten.
Missed 24 days from work ... wow. I wonder what she did instead?
She missed so many days of work when she got sick for a week due her doctor not giving her the right antibiotic for a sinus infection and then her right knee is jacked up and from cheerleading as a teen, then she had 2 surgeries and now her knee is still swollen from horseback riding.
But these are not my issues anymore. I hope she ends up homeless and alone for the rest of her life. people like here need to be punished. As for the guy, well, there is no reason to beat him up really. It really isn't his job to make sure a woman remains faithful or not. The burden is on the one who made the commitment.
So her phone is now shut off, her clothes are at her mom's, I took the wedding ring I gave her and flattened it with a hammer and threw the diamond into the desert. I also burned our wedding pics. I contacted an attorney on Friday as well.
I did leaver her the flattened ring for her sentimental values though.
It's 4am here in AZ. I miss her so much, and I love her even more. I feel weak and sad. I just keep asking myself, "why am I not enough, why am I not worth the time and effort, why do my mistakes bear such dire consequences." Other men can cheat on and beat their wives/gf, be criminals, be controlling, diabolic, jobless, lazy, weak, unskilled, sloppy, ignorant, obese, smoke, excessively drink alcohol, and rude. Me, I'm a martial artist, an Iraq vet, I have a full time job, I care, and I'm honest and open. My biggest problem is I'm 5'2", but I can protect myself and others from harm. Sure I have my faults like anyone else but I'm really not that bad. It's only when I have been taken advantage of that I go demonic. I can have a very bad temper but not to the point of hurting people.
I really do hate myself for failing at yet another relationship. I not strong enough, tall enough, rich enough, good looking enough or just not enough of something I haven't found yet. I guess I need to read more, get fatter, meaner, uglier or something. Maybe there is just no hope for me. Perhaps I truly do not belong with the human race. If this wasn't an apt, I would smash every mirror here. I hate looking at myself. I just want to cry like a child and give up. I won't bleed like that though, I have my hatred of her to keep me strong enough to survive.
But why does it always have to be this way? Why are they always ready to ditch me the first time a new **** shows up and so eager to try to hurt me as bad as possible. You'd think women just want me dead.
I feel like Alex DeLarge listening to Beethoven after "the Ludovico Technique", and if I were in a second story apartment, I would probably throw myself out a window. I really do hate dating and I don't want to go through it again.
We could have been happy together if she just had some backbone, inner strength, faith in us, a sense of right right and wrong, foresight, or just some goddamned common sense.
Your hurting, I suggest you step back and breathe. Go to the doctor for some help to keep you calm and rational . Don't make any more big decisions about your marriage until you have full control of yourself and given yourself some time to think through the process. She may still decide to come back and work on the relationship. Posted via Mobile Device
You're married to a selfish, silly woman with a sense of entitlement. And like someone said before, you allowed her to get this way by not agreeing to, and enforcing, boundaries in your marriage.
Just take care of you for now. You are hurting and that is normal. Get to a doctor and get some meds if you need them.
Don't rush into things right now, take your time to process.
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Re: Am I being hasty and cruel? 
