So last night I learned that the EA my husband had that I thought was a few months at best lasted well over a year! Holy God. Does it ever end? Today I am deciding rather or not I want the details. The real details. Not just when or how long or why but what they said to each other, What is special about her etc..... I want to know but I can never un hear it. What to do?
I pushed for details , did he ever buy the condoms, when did they meet , what positons, was there oral involved? At the time I needed to know but when we did start having sex again all I could think of was them, as a result I banned certain positions as I could nt face it and now even climbing over him to get out of bed in the mornings is a trigger cos I know she loved going on top - so maybe ask for a few details - take time to absorb them then go back for more info if you need to?
I pushed for details , did he ever buy the condoms, when did they meet , what positons, was there oral involved? At the time I needed to know but when we did start having sex again all I could think of was them, as a result I banned certain positions as I could nt face it and now even climbing over him to get out of bed in the mornings is a trigger cos I know she loved going on top - so maybe ask for a few details - take time to absorb them then go back for more info if you need to?
Forget what she liked. Get on top and reclaim the territory. My WS told me she got on top once with the OM (yea right). At the beginning of R when ever she did this I had to tell her to stop. For some reason this was something new, in that my WS wanted to do this right away (get on top). Maybe TMI, but in the past it was something we did along the way, but now it has started out as her primary first move. Still makes me question it and starts some mind movies but I am trying to get over it.
Don't know if this helps you but I do not want to live the rest of my life making my decisions on what they did or did not do. I am dealing with enough stuff that I am avoiding due to they did this or that and I had to suck up some things. They had sex in my car. I wanted to burn it. But I got over it by calling it the **** mobile and I will get rid of it sometime this year. Heck the dude made my wife moan so what do I do there?
It sucks but try to work through it the best you can.
__________________
This kind of cosmic dumbassery occupies a temporal plane of ineptitude and lack of reason so profound a Zen master could spend a lifetime meditating upon its philosophical consequences.”
Canttrustu this is one of my Q's on the list I have for my MC this Monday! (he/she will die when I walk in with a list-ha) I want "think" I want to know because it may help to make me really KNOW if he is done or not.
Kissing is what my H was caught doing and I recall me so freaking angry because we used to always kiss-lots-then the last few years we just stopped. I did, however, say over and over I missed kissing and wanted to kiss and his excuse was that he dips (I didn't realize he was checked out already). BUT now when we kiss I give in BC I refuse to let the OW win...
Forget what she liked. Get on top and reclaim the territory. My WS told me she got on top once with the OM (yea right). At the beginning of R when ever she did this I had to tell her to stop. For some reason this was something new, in that my WS wanted to do this right away (get on top). Maybe TMI, but in the past it was something we did along the way, but now it has started out as her primary first move. Still makes me question it and starts some mind movies but I am trying to get over it.
Thanks for that - you re right ! Why shouls I let that b!tch control my sex life . I think some times you re so close to the situation you can t see outside the box! So glad I found this site
Forget what she liked. Get on top and reclaim the territory. My WS told me she got on top once with the OM (yea right). At the beginning of R when ever she did this I had to tell her to stop. For some reason this was something new, in that my WS wanted to do this right away (get on top). Maybe TMI, but in the past it was something we did along the way, but now it has started out as her primary first move. Still makes me question it and starts some mind movies but I am trying to get over it.
Don't know if this helps you but I do not want to live the rest of my life making my decisions on what they did or did not do. I am dealing with enough stuff that I am avoiding due to they did this or that and I had to suck up some things. They had sex in my car. I wanted to burn it. But I got over it by calling it the **** mobile and I will get rid of it sometime this year. Heck the dude made my wife moan so what do I do there?
It sucks but try to work through it the best you can.
Thorn! Did she tell you that he made her moan????OMG!!
this year long affair was with a co-worker, or someone he had direct access to on a daily basis?
Don't know how long or how many drips of trickle truth it will take... But, it happened. 2 adults with daily access to one another having an emotional affair for over a year but not going physical?... No, Sorry.
It would take an incredible amount of convincing for me to even consider the possiblity it didnt happen. Honestly. I just can't fathom enough evidence existing to convince me of that. No chance in my mind, zero. zip.
Heck the dude made my wife moan so what do I do there?
UMMMMMM you make her moan louder!
When were together, I make sure she is REALLY REALLY satisfied! I figure (at least in my mind) that I'll be dammed if someone else is gonna get the pleasure of being the best!.
this year long affair was with a co-worker, or someone he had direct access to on a daily basis?
Don't know how long or how many drips of trickle truth it will take... But, it happened. 2 adults with daily access to one another having an emotional affair for over a year but not going physical?... No, Sorry.
It would take an incredible amount of convincing for me to even consider the possiblity it didnt happen. Honestly. I just can't fathom enough evidence existing to convince me of that. No chance in my mind, zero. zip.
I'm really sorry.
I know where youre comin from pit. I wouldnt either but I do know someone they work with and she pretty much verifies my husbands story. Believe me when I say my head is not up my a$$ and my eyes are wide open here. I have eyes on him at work and if he leaves that building w/her I will know.
Thorn! Did she tell you that he made her moan????OMG!!
She did not have to tell me. She did tell me that he said she had a nice wet pus** and she said to him fuc* me oh please fuc* me and it turned her on. maybe TMI but if my wife said that to me I wouldn't last 10 seconds.
On December the 13th I told her to tell me everything or I was leaving her. I got most of her story that night and ended up in the E.R. because I drank a bottle or more of bourbon. I remember having two bottles and one was empty and the other one was hit pretty good. I can't remember the last time I was that drunk but I remember everything she said. I remember in the E. R. I could not even speak I was in such pain, curled up in a ball and my WS had to do all the talking as I was passing out. Funny how they treat a drunk. You feel like you are dying and they are not in a hurry because they know you are not dying, they deal with it all the time.
__________________
This kind of cosmic dumbassery occupies a temporal plane of ineptitude and lack of reason so profound a Zen master could spend a lifetime meditating upon its philosophical consequences.”
Thor I am sooo sorry you had to hear that crap. I couldnt handle it. Not that much detail. I dont want that much. IF he had sex with her( he says no, I think I believe him) I would throw up hearing that stuff about him with her. Just knowing he shared his personal thoughts is killin' me.
this year long affair was with a co-worker, or someone he had direct access to on a daily basis?
Don't know how long or how many drips of trickle truth it will take... But, it happened. 2 adults with daily access to one another having an emotional affair for over a year but not going physical?... No, Sorry.
It would take an incredible amount of convincing for me to even consider the possiblity it didnt happen. Honestly. I just can't fathom enough evidence existing to convince me of that. No chance in my mind, zero. zip.
21Likes
Do I want the details??? 
