Her claiming it to be ONS doesn't make sense. If it was she would have told you right after it or after she realized she was pregnant, not on the 8th month.
As other's suggested, get legal advise ASAP and kick her arse to the curb.
I'd recommend taking at least one more paternity test just to be sure that the first one is valid. My friend, you have your hands full. If your wife is truly repentant and shows contrition, and you still truly love her and offer her forgiveness, then you must decide if you want to raise that child with her and claim it as your own. You would, in my book, be "the man" for doing that. But you and her would have to submit to a lot of marriage and individual counseling in order to see it through.
If that is not an option, then you'll have to cut your losses with her and move on. I'd try to talk to a pastor or a counselor ASAP. And then if necessary, get with an attorney to see what options you have. An annulment might be in order rather than a divorce, at least in this case. Best of luck to you, my friend!
I'd recommend taking at least one more paternity test just to be sure that the first one is valid. My friend, you have your hands full. If your wife is truly repentant and shows contrition, and you still truly love her and offer her forgiveness, then you must decide if you want to raise that child with her and claim it as your own. You would, in my book, be "the man" for doing that. But you and her would have to submit to a lot of marriage and individual counseling in order to see it through.
If that is not an option, then you'll have to cut your losses with her and move on. I'd try to talk to a pastor or a counselor ASAP. And then if necessary, get with an attorney to see what options you have. An annulment might be in order rather than a divorce, at least in this case. Best of luck to you, my friend!
That takes some really big cajones. There was a chance my wife was pregnant from her ONS, and I was considering it because we had 7 years of good history and two kids and I'm a pretty forgiving person. But after such a short marriage? And no kids? What's the compelling reason to stay and put yourself through all that hard work and anguish?
Raising another mans child for the next 18 years. It's one thing if she was preg before you were together, and MANY men have a hard time doing that. But a child that is a trigger/reminder of your wifes betrayal?! I don't think I could do it. I'm so sorry for you but if you could muster up the strength to leave her ..and please get a lawyer, in some states just by being the husband...you are financially responsible.
i'm all for inflicting as much pain as possible.. show everyone the test results, mom,dad,sis,bro,hell even the preacher that married you. wanna cover all your bases so she can't accuse you of just running off. then dump the ho.
?? adoption would give the baby two loving parents, instead of one lying, cheating, mother and a father no one knows.
There are literally thousands of healthy, rational people who want to adopt babies because they can't have their own.
Having two adoptive parents, even if they later on divorce, improves the baby's lot by giving him/her not only economic advantages but psychological ones as well. But most women who give birth form such a strong emotional bond with their baby that giving him/her up for adoption is excruciatingly painful.
OP, it is HER child and her responsibility. Your love for her is not enough when she had no respect for you and destroyed your trust in her. Even without the pregnancy, the marriage is dying. Wake up and smell the coffee.
I have been married for a couple of years now. We had been trying for a baby ever since we got married. After 15 months of trying, my wife finally announced she was pregnant. We were over the moon. We both were really excited about the arrival, telling everyone our good news along with scan photos. Life was great.
Anyway, when she was 8 months pregnant, my wife told me that she had had a one night stand "ages ago". She had been very drunk, and on various medication at the time. When I pressed her to tell me when it was, it turned out to be 8 months previously. She told me that it had been unprotected sex, although she had used the morning after pill. She was sure the baby was mine because we had had sex a couple of times at the right time. Anyway, I asked for a prenatal paternity test and found out (9 days before the baby was born) that it wasn't mine. That was the single worst moment of my life.
I love my wife dearly, and she loves me too and is devastated at what she has done. She has also offered to give the baby up for adoption, as she would rather live without the baby than live without me.
You were trying for a baby for one &half years, she had a ONS and got pregnant immediately. Surely she know that there was a chance for the OM to be the father of her child. your wife who loves you soooo much, who loves you more than her child, who cant live without you lied to you about the real possibility of OM being the father, Didnt ever mentioned about her cheating to you. Made you believe that its your baby. Dont you feel her lying and cheating for this long and making you a fool for this long is more painful and hurting than her ONS. Her love for you is for her convenience and fear of loosing her meal ticket.
Dont you feel her the most selfish women to give away her child whom she carried on her womb for 9 months to be with you? Do you believe that she really intended for that, IMO it was only a way of hooking you on her hook to make you believe that she is in love with you, actually she is not that much in love with you, else she should have told you about her cheating on next day, she should have gone for the option of abortion as she very well know the fact that raising some one child especially she got from cheating her husband is painful for her husband for rest of your life.
Do you believe her story of ONS, i don't think that what she told you is even a fraction of truth. It may have been a affair, may be ging now also under your nose.
If you don't want to raise someones child and look back your life with resent and pain for rest of your life, this is your chance to move away from her its a gods gift for you to live a normal peaceful life with some other women who love you and bear your own child. To live your life with happiness and meaning. take this chance you wont get this chance again, if you make any delay you will be paying CS for another 18yrs and she may be living with someone else.
Holy sh!t, divorce divorce divorce! You were thrown a hail Mary since you can prove pre-birth the child is NOT yours. Absolutely do NOT sign anything showing that you accept you are the father- not the birth certificate, *nothing.* TELL NO ONE after it is born that you are the father. Get a lawyer NOW before you get stuck paying child support for a kid that isn't yours for 18 years.
If she wants support for her kid, she had better hope she knows who the father is. I highly doubt it was a ONS. She hid it from you for 8 months, how could you possibly trust anything she says about the details?
Also, in case I wasn't clear enough... do NOT reconcile, divorce! If you stay who knows how many other men's children you will raise for her.
Just divorce, do not push for adoption. The child is innocent here, he deserves to have at least a mother.
What?
Adoption to a loving home where the baby is truly wanted and has a chance to be raised in a healthy marriage and family is not a punishent to the baby.
Adoption is in the best interests of the child, and I am in favor of that. Adoptive parents love their children.
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Re: Devastating Situation - What would you do? 
