No contact with OM/OW.

Numb in Ohio · 04-12-2012, 10:44 PM

I had not joined TAM on first confrontation. So my H called her his first day back out on the road. He told me that he told her that they couldn't talk anymore because "I" was not comfortable with it.... WTH!! Not that it was wrong.... but that "I" didn't accept them talking???

Joined TAM before finding out about second woman,,, so I emailed her.... didn't have him have any part of it...

Hunger · 04-13-2012, 01:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Morrigan

I tried to break it off with the OM so many times. I just couldn't do it. Every time I said never again and the next day I went back to him. That's why I told Beowulf. I needed his help because I was weak. Best decision I have ever made.

Yup same here and I kept tattling on myself which tortured my husband. I would make contact for a few days which would build up an immense amount of guilt and confusion that I had to tell my husband. I felt like if I told my husband than it would make it easier for me to keep NC but nope. I would repeat the same cycle three times before I knew there was no possible way I could have my cake and eat it too which was EXACTLY what I was doing. My conscious wore on me daily when I had contact. I am still having a difficult time feeling romantic love for my husband, but I know for a fact that as long as I keep doing what I am doing that at least my head will be clear to make any decisions that need to be made. I feel like I am becoming an expert at affairs...... craziness.

Hunger · 04-13-2012, 01:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Morrigan

Hunger and Leslie, you apologized too! Why did we do that? That's something I still don't understand and I did it. What were we apologizing for?

Pshhhh. Beats me. In an affair fog anything can happen although it makes absolutely no sense.

Hunger · 04-13-2012, 02:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sigma1299

Not a female thing. I did to. I was apologizing to her for being one half of such a horrible thing she was a part of, she couldn't have had an affair with me without me. And, for not being man enough to not let it happen, for not being a better person, for the pain I caused her. I actually carried some guilt about it for a while. Ironically enough she told me not to apologize, that she was a big girl and she never apologized to me.

Yeah I guess I felt like I was leading him on considering he never reached and and only wanted me to do what made me happy yet I kept contacting him. :/ I felt bad that I put him in that situation; but now I dont because he could have stopped answering my phone calls.

Hunger · 04-13-2012, 02:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CantSitStill

I stopped contact a bunch of times..told him I needed to work on my marriage, he complied every time and there I was texting him again a couple days later..When I confessed to Calvin the OM must've gotten scared.. He stopped texting and talking, he ignored me which actually helped because it made me angry then not wanna talk to him ever again.
Posted via Mobile Device

Good he has a reason to be scared. :-)

CantSitStill · 04-13-2012, 02:06 PM

I guess I'm the only one here that did not apologize..all I cared about was me and what I was getting from him..Didn't feel sorry for the OM at all. At first I wondered what he was doing or thinking, even looked up his fb after no contact out of curiousity but now I have no desire to even know anything going on in his life..
Posted via Mobile Device

sigma1299 · 04-13-2012, 02:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DownUnder

Sigma, i truly wish you can speak to my husband....*sigh*

But i know that he is not gonna listen right now....even if someone talk to him until they are blue in the face he wouldn't have listen

Your right. No one can make him listen - he's got to want to. If you think there is anything I can offer or do to help please let me know. Hoping for the best for you.

Sig.